Unorthodox Un-Christmas

Our flight was scheduled to depart at 7:30pm in the evening tonight. Given that we had seen most of Belgrade's sights yesterday, we slept a bit later this morning, then strolled down Knez Mihailova, Belgrade's main pedestrian shopping street.

We were a bit confused as to why there were so few Christmas decorations on this promenade- after all, one of the reasons for coming to Serbia, aside from getting country #80 on my passport, was to see Belgrade's Christmas decorations and Christmas markets. I love Christmas markets! The magical mix of chalets, mulled wine, Santa, and Christmas music is enough to make me tolerate winter. For a few hours, at least.

So imagine our disappointment to discover that Serbia's Orthodox Church celebrates Christmas not on December 25, but on January 7- and the Christmas markets don't get set up for another week.

Well poop.

We did find one "Christmas market" on Knez Mihailova, however. I use quotation marks because the "market" was in front of a US-style shopping center, and 100% sponsored by Coca-Cola, in what I can only describe as the least Serbian Christmas experience possible. But the "market" did offer the only outdoor Christmas tree on display (though to be clear, the tree was FAKE), so we took a quick selfie with Santa and the tree, and quickly departed.

Last night we had a Serbian dinner at the modern, elegant Iva New Balkan Cuisine; today we had reservations for a very old-school Serbian dining experience. Dva Jelena ("Two Deer"), located on Belgrade's famous Skadarlija Street, has been serving hearty, heavy Serbian game dishes since 1832. Over the decades, celebrities from Jimmy Carter to Jaime Oliver to Margaret Thatcher have dined here.

Dva Jelena's dark, wood-paneled interior resembles a hunting lodge, and its formal, tuxedo'ed waiters appear to have been working there for a VERY long time. We were seated in the center of the restaurant, and given heavy leather-bound menus.

To start, we ordered cheese-stuffed red peppers and pork cracklings with cornbread, alongside a jug of red Serbian wine. For our main lunch dishes, we were told to order Serbian game; Matt ordered srneći gulaš (venison goulash), and I opted for pileći medaljoni (cheese and ham-stuffed chicken, rolled in bacon).

To be clear, this was neither "elevated" nor "light" cuisine. But all of it was fantastic- simply but perfectly prepared.

For dessert, we split a pita sa višnjama (sour cherry strudel) with glasses of rakija, Balkan fruit brandy that is better referred to as "possibly toxic firewater."

Our lunch lasted well over two hours, which left us just enough time to catch the 4pm bus to Nikola Tesla Airport for our 7:30pm flight home. The joke was on us, though, because within five minutes of boarding the airport bus, WizzAir helpfully texted me of yet another hourlong delay. (Which eventually became a two-hour delay. Thanks, WizzAir.)

So that was our 48 hours in Serbia, and passport stamp #80! #81 is coming very soon...Read more