Yerevan

The marshrutka driver from Tbilisi to Yerevan was definitely Armenian; very responsible on the Georgian side of the border, he reverted to his native, preferred driving style (aggressive, erratic, anti-gravity) as soon as we crossed onto his home soil. It’s no wonder that written on the back of every Armenian bus is the exhortation: BRAKE!

Armenia is the first (and only) country we're visiting this year with orange on the flag. A monumental milestone. We stayed 3 days in the capital, Yerevan, which was just enough time to get a measure of the country and see some of the main sights, including the Garni Temple, the Geghard Monastery, Symphony of Stones, Ararat Cognac Museum, and the Armenian Genocide Memorial.

Like the two other Caucasus countries we've already visited, Armenians are adamant that:
1) They have the most unique culture
2) They have the longest history of wine-making
3) They are the most oppressed nation in the region

In fact, Armenia does score pretty highly on all three counts. Firstly, they do have a unique culture, with their own alphabet, an extremely difficult-to-learn language, decent food, and beautiful landscapes. Both Kim K and Cher are Armenian, which tells you everything you need to know about their enthusiasm for plastic surgery, fillers, and Botox. Our walking tour guide proudly told us how Armenians had invented everything from ATMs to automatic gearboxes to US Dollars to the prophet Noah to Frank Sinatra. Impressive if true! We also bought some last minute tickets to watch a ballet at the cavernous Armenian National Opera House, which was... an experience to be remembered. The ballet, Cipollino, is about a little onion who rebels against the oppression of the evil Prince Lemon and arrogant Señor Tomato. If it sounds bizarre, it was. But also somehow good? We never thought we'd be emotionally invested in the romantic dance of a suave aubergine, but here we are. Cultured.

Point 2: they do have ancient wines, and especially brandy, which we tried at the Ararat Brandy Factory. Armenian cognac was Winston Churchill's favourite drink—he necked a bottle a day. They recommended a 'winter warmer' cocktail with cinnamon, honey and tea which we will absolutely be trying when we get home. On a related note: everything in Armenia is named Ararat. Restaurants, banks, hotels, clothing brands, even a significant number of men. Mount Ararat (where Noah supposedly landed his ark) is enormous and visible from viewpoints all across Yerevan. It's the symbol of the country... though it's actually just across the border in Turkey.

This brings us onto the third point: the Armenians have undeniably been more oppressed than their neighbours. This is obviously not the accolade you want, but is made more bitter because the Armenian Genocide still hasn't been acknowledged by most countries, more than a century later. Over 1.5mil people were massacred in 1915-18 by the Ottoman Turks, who also expropriated about half of Armenia's territory (including Mt Ararat) while much of Europe was distracted by WWI. One consequence is a huge diaspora, which is why twice as many Armenians live abroad today than in Armenia itself. This is still the most bitter sore in the country's history, and impacts on all their foreign policy. The borders with Turkey and Azerbaijan remain closed and fractious, Russia is their closest ally and economic benefactor, and their relations with Iran are surprisingly good (in an "enemy's enemy" way).

The Georgian border at least remains open, which is where we're returning to. We decided to catch the overnight train from Yerevan to Tbilisi, mostly so we could say that we caught the midnight train to Georgia. We’re going back to find a simpler place and time.Read more