• Coxlers On Tour
Feb – Apr 2017

Asia and Australia 2017

A 77-day adventure by Coxlers On Tour Read more
  • Trip start
    February 8, 2017

    Day 1 - Happy Valley

    February 8, 2017 in Hong Kong ⋅ ⛅ 18 °C

    We're here! Day one sees us in Hong Kong. My 2nd city (though that still doesn't mean I have a sense of direction around here). After a smooth flight we taxi'd to our AirBNB. We're staying in Tsim Sha Tsui and for central HK it's a pretty standard size studio apartment and it did bring me my first comedy sign of the trip (see photos, no casual pissing please).

    When you're the partner of a horse racing nut you get used to being 'dragged' to any track in a 20 mile radius of a romantic trip even when you've been travelling for the best part of 24 hours and as Wednesday night is 'Happy Wednesday' race night it was a quick change and off to Happy Valley.

    The atmosphere at HV is amazing and I can't imagine there's many other tracks with sky scrapers as the backdrop so even as a non-better it's a fun place to check out. They also wear far jazzier silks - or as I prefer to call them, aprons. After some charades and pointing Matt managed to find the race card vending machine and after almost buying the version in Chinese was set to study form to decide (*cough* guess *cough*) who he should bet on. My preferred method is to watch the horses parade and look for the feisty ones. Sadly we had no winners and for the sake of our holiday fund called it betting quits after a couple of races and spent money on beer and dirty hot dogs instead. The hot dog at least had some greenery hidden under the suspicious cheese sauce. I'm hoping the food gets better/slightly more authentic from here...
    Read more

  • Day 2 - He Ain't Heavy

    February 9, 2017 in Hong Kong ⋅ ☀️ 11 °C

    So things I've learnt about the apartment we're staying in. It's somewhere in the vicinity of a late night karaoke establishment. And that this plus the time zone change does not lend itself to the best night's sleep. That being said we still made it out by 9am to get the MTR to Lantau Island and catch the bus to the Big Buddha (via Starbucks. Standard.) It was an interesting up and down through the mountains bus ride on seats ill designed for a 6 foot brick house but we made it in one piece and early enough to beat the big crowds which came later.

    When they say Big Buddha they're not exaggerating - - though I very much enjoy the large list of qualification adjectives to give it the title of 'largest outdoor sitting bronze Buddha'. It's 34 metres tall and sitting on a stone building/altar which is sitting on top of a hill. There were a lot of stairs. 268 stairs a lot. Despite the necessary exercise it's one of my favourite HK tourist spots though and interesting to learn about how it was cast and transported.

    After the much easier downstairs walk we encountered some of the local wildlife include free roaming cows stealing apples and dogs that I thought were dead but were just sun bathing. We walked about the small temples of the Po Lin monastery which housed some beautiful gold buddhas. There was incense being lit everywhere and drums being banged. Very serene and peaceful, even with Matt having a go on the drum.

    Lunch was..... ambiguous. The cafe at the monastery is vegetarian only and as everything else had fungus in the name we went for a 'mixed vegetarian.' I still could not tell you what any of the components were but it was very tasty. One thing was curry flavoured, one sweet and the other again ambiguous.

    We continued exploring the site including the Wisdom Path and an abandoned wreck of a tea garden. I even found a geocache to my great geeky delight. After the excitement of that we caught the bus to Tai O, a fishing village not far away. Man was there a lot of dried fish. And more sleeping dogs (not dried or dead). Plus some cool houses on stilts. I took us on a bit of an adventure wandering through the village with the fake confidence of someone who has no idea where they're going or if they're trespassing but luckily we made it back to the bus stop without being arrested.

    In the evening we grabbed some lunch at a cafe and took the Star Ferry across the harbour and back. Hopefully at some point Matt will learn that it's winter in Hong Kong and chilly in the evenings before Starbucks bankrupts us.
    Read more

  • Day 3 - WAG-ing

    February 10, 2017 in Hong Kong ⋅ 🌙 9 °C

    New lesson of the day. When you're two 'English Roses' you shouldn't wait to ask 'am I getting pink?' Before putting sun cream and a cap on even if it's shady. Especially if one of you is bald.

    We dragged out pink neck and nose out of bed after a better night's sleep for some early-ish morning Dim Sum at Tim Ho Wan. Other branches of this small chain have Michelin stars making them apparently the cheapest Michelin starred restaurants in the world (we're such tourists). We were near a non-starred one so went with it. It was really delicious. Their specialist BBQ porks buns are a bargain food highlight and recommended if you're ever in HK.

    After breakfast we continued ticking off our tourist info card and went up Victoria Peak on the tram. The tram line first opened in 1888 but I think they've updated the system since then (though probably not that recently). It basically is two carriages being pulled 45degrees up Victoria Peak with a feeling something could snap any minute and send you plummeting roller coaster style to the bottom (don't worry Mum, spoiler alert, that didn't happen). At the top we checked out the slightly cloudy 428m above sea level view. I'm not sure what it is about the need to see major cities from a high point but I still buy into it every time.

    We had to cut out trip to the Peak fairly short for our afternoon plans so caught the tram back down and headed to Happy Valley to meet Matt's friend Tom who'd invited him to play football with some friends and work colleagues. I played WAG and half watched the football and half watched the kites (the bird type) circling overhead.

    We headed back to Tom's place and hung out with him and his wife Angela for a while before hitting happy hour at Saint Germain. Several wines later we went to Keung Kee restaurant for more BBQ pork, noodles and duck fried rice. Yum.

    We caught the star ferry home after some MTR disruption (can't get over the 25p bargain price). It's apparently the coolest day of winter so far in HK. At least we won't get more burnt.... wear sunscreen kids. That's almost as good as the advice I got from the Drainage Services Department today. 'Do it from the heart' they say. Whilst sorting the drains.
    Read more

  • Day 4 - Stella

    February 11, 2017 in Hong Kong ⋅ ☀️ 14 °C

    Our final full day in HK. I allowed us to have a lie in until 9.30 seeing as we weren't at the first planned activity until 11. I must learn to be a hippy traveller at some point in these 77 days and 'stop living by the clock, man'. Said activity was a walking tour with HK Free Walk around the area we're staying in, TST. Our 'ambassador' was Stella. She was every so slightly nuts which made for an entertaining few hours learning about the history of HK, the feng shui of the sky line and that the number 4 is bad luck cause it brings death (something like that anyway.) Plus I ate street food fish balls so maybe I am beginning to take some risks. I'll be getting a tattoo from a man in the back of a van next (jokes mum). It was one of those tours when in theory it's free but the tour guides work for tips and some cheapskate always buggers off 10 minutes before the tour finishes to avoid handing any of their cash over. If that's you shame on you.

    After the information overload, most of which I've already forgotten, we caught the Star Ferry for the 600th time this trip and went to Soho to ride the mid levels escalators and eat huge burgers. Then we walked around the harbour front and went to my home away from home hotel bar Sugar at the East hotel (where I go with work) for a spectacular harbour view and a glass of time or two.

    We attempted to watch the nightly Symphony of Lights show but couldn't even get close to a view so went to Caliente for Mexican food and beers. Highlights included free tequila and a drunk woman spilling a drink just after the previous one she had got wiped up from her clumsy hands. That makes it sound like a lame night but it very much wasn't.

    It was a less blog exciting, more consumption heavy day if I'm honest and to top it off Matt's found a channel showing the Man U game... Fun stat, we've walked 56.6km since we got to HK which has maybe burnt off one dinner. Maybe.
    Read more

  • Day 5 - Bangkok

    February 12, 2017 in Thailand ⋅ ☀️ 28 °C

    Today we left HK for pastures new - Bangkok. Not an awful lot of time for exciting activities once we got here and settled into the hostel so today's post is a brief top line list of things and thoughts so far:

    - Our hostel has a live-in tiny dog which the manager calls her daughter.
    - There was a dance music concert on sinisterly called 'Don't Let Daddy Know' which was full of teens.
    - Not very spicy is hugely relative.
    - Bars enjoy an eclectic sense of decoration. Danee bar which we visited last nice had classical paintings of wine and cheese paired with retro Christmas decorations and a picture which looked either like a horse or ship depending on the viewer angle hung next to pictures of the King.
    - Beer is cheap.
    - Actually most things so far are cheap.
    - I think I'll be sweaty the entire time we're here.

    Now to go crank up the air con.
    Read more

  • Day 6-Beef Brains,Black Pants&Bum Driers

    February 13, 2017 in Thailand ⋅ 🌙 24 °C

    Happy Monday wherever you may be. Wherever we may be is a 32 degrees Bangkok and set for a food tour around Bangrak (which apparently translates as Village of Love which sounds romantic when you're told it's named because there's lots of different cultures but the sub story is that it's where the sailors came to port). After putting on our precautionary bottle of suncream and insect repellent we met our super lovely guide Paeng and a motley international group of greedy people.

    First stop was a Chinese-Thai spot for roast duck. I'm so glad we did this tour as even after my fish ball bravery I'm not sure we would have stumbled in to somewhere with whole ducks hanging up and a random kitchen on a cart for fear of immediate and painful dysentery. (FYI status update 22.51 so far no dysentery so it was at least not immediate)

    Next up was an Indian-Thai place imaginatively called Muslim Restaurant. Here we're had Massaman curry and beef brains. Yes. Beef brains. In fairness it looked like mince and tasted not far off so my bobby big ballsing saying we'd go for it paid off.

    Third stop after a quick boat across the river was a restaurant where we learnt that to get something not spicy you should ask for 'one chilli'. Apparently the papaya salad we got was to that request but the after- burn supports Helen's Theory of Spicy Relativity from yesterday's post.

    Stop 3.5 was for deep fried bananas/sweet potatoes/taro from a street vendor. Tasty. Stop 4 was the Panlee bakery where we had delicious pandans buns (shout out to my girls who'll get why that excited me) and iced Thai tea.

    The final stop was for Thai green curry and coconut milk ice cream. By this point I was full to bursting, pleased with my choice of elasticated waist trousers and glad it was the last stop. We said bye to Paeng and rolled back to the hostel.

    Quick power nap and out for a massage at Orchid Massage and Spa. Neither Matt nor I have really had a massage before let alone a scary Thai one. They had a couples deal where you're both done in the same room at the same time so at least we could be confused together about the teeny black pants. Are they definitely pants?! Should we put the robe on?! Do we lie down?! Is this all a scam?! (Yes, no, yes, no). I don't recall having anyone standing on me before so that was weird, I also have really ticklish feet and knees which was awkward but all in all my review is painful but worked.

    Last stop of the day was to Terminal 21, a nearby shopping centre where every floor is themed like a different country, including the toilets. The London tube one was particular excellent but definite highlight was the electronic toilets throughout which had a heated seat, 'shower mode' and a bum drier function. Want. One. We grabbed a quick beer on the way home in a decidedly dodgy joint where we quietly commentated on the evening of a Western man with two giggling Thai girls. Maybe it was just a lovely friendship.
    Read more

  • Day 7 - Temples

    February 14, 2017 in Thailand ⋅ ☀️ 28 °C

    An early-ish start today to attempt to beat some of the heat and hit some of Bangkok's cultural landmarks. There are a lot of temples in Bangkok, thousands and thousand, but we decided to aim realistically and just go to some of the biggies, Wat Arun, Wat Pho and the Grand Palace.

    We started off getting the boat along the Chao Phraya river to Wat Arun. Some parts of Bangkok have an amazing transit system whilst other parts rely on canals - unless you want to try and persuade a taxi driver to turn the meter on like they're supposed to rather than scam you. Wat Arun is the Temple of Dawn. It was quite small compared to put afternoon stops but very pretty.

    As a note, apparently it's very offensive for a woman to sit next to/bump into/go too near a monk so I spent a lot of today on high alert - and we now have a little song called 'Don't Bump The Monk' in the style of an old Big Breakfast game tune (which is probably offensive in itself)

    Next stop was Wat Pho, Temple of Reclining Buddha. Again beautiful, especially in the sunshine as it was covered in coloured glass. The focal point as the name suggests is a huge gold plated reclining Buddha housed in a long temple.

    Final stop was the Grand Palace. A big site with lots of temples and buildings built for housing various important items; including the Emerald Buddha. (No photos allowed of this one). The site was very busy with people coming to pay their respects to the King who passed away last year and by this point in the day we were so hot and temple-fatigued that we called it a day and got a tuk tuk ride back to the pier. Not too hairy a tuk tuk ride really as the traffic was pretty bad but it's something you have to experience at least once in BK.

    Next stop was China town and a hubbub of markets and people riding mopeds between stalls. We were both getting hangry so stopped as a place serving fish ball noodles. Every time I eat I await the food poisoning but still hasn't arrived yet...

    We came back home for a couple of hours to shower and get ready to go out. We picked one of the more casual roof top bars, Cloud 47, but as a couple of non-romantics we forgot it was Valentine's Day so it was pretty busy. Everyone else was there all roses and looking into each other eyes whilst I double parked on special offer wine and Matt had a solo pitcher of Chang. Classy.

    Final stop of the day was the infamous Khao San Road. We got there with a crazy taxi driver who kept going on about Tony Blair getting his wife pregnant in the Caribbean, how expensive Europe is and going 'bomb, bomb' whilst turning around to slap Matt on the knee and shout Yorkshire. Khao San Road is party haven for backpackers and took me back to my summer holidays as an 18 year old in Gran Canaria except with more people selling scorpions on sticks and wrist bands with various lewd slogans on which I won't repeat here. The words 'youngsters' and 'too loud to have a conversation' were uttered as we chose a quieter bar where I enjoyed bottles of wine cooler. I have no idea what a wine cooler is but felt like a 'classy' alcopop. Rock and roll. A less eventful taxi home and bed by 1am - by the end of the trip we might have managed something more party respectable.

    Last partial day in Bangkok tomorrow and then we head north to Chiang Mai on the sleeper train for a quieter pace of life.
    Read more

  • Day 8 - The Sleeper Train

    February 15, 2017 in Thailand ⋅ ⛅ 25 °C

    I can't believe it's only a week since we landed on to the mega trip!

    After last night's 'crazy' late night we had a lie in and took our time packing up to leave Yin, the dog daughter and the Cube hostel. It was a slightly crazy establishment, yesterday I pulled the curtain pole down and the shower head flew off most of the time but would go back in a second if I were in Bangkok again.

    From there we ditched our bags at the station left luggage where there was a sign about leaving no food in bags because of the rats. Nice. We decided to walk the 1 mile to Jim Thompson's house to avoid the inevitable scam attempts in any mode of transport. I'm glad we did as we saw a nice temple, visited Tesco Thailand and found a geocache (for any fellow caching geeks I also dropped my first retrieved trackable). Plus a dead crocodile in the river which was less nice.

    The destination of our walk was Jim Thompson's House. JT was an American ex-spy who fell in love with Thailand and rejuvenated its silk export industry then disappeared without a trace. Whilst he was alive he had 6 traditional Thai houses brought to Bangkok and put them together to make a new house. We had a guided tour around with a hilarious guide. The house is beautiful and it was actually really interesting for the random house of a man we'd never heard of.

    Our last stop in Bangkok was the Caturday Cat Cafe for a late lunch and drink. As the name suggests it's a cafe where there's lots of cats. I had mixed feelings about it. The cats seemed well cared for and were very pretty but people were agitating them by picking them up and no one was stopping them even though there were rules. Rules!

    We're now on a sleeper train heading to Chiang Mai. As it only cost about £30 each we have a private room to house our bunk bed as opposed to 80 bunks in a carriage further down the train. Oh the luxury! (See photo). We've already checked out the 'restaurant' for strange ready meals and are now tucked up on beds which are definitely not memory foam. There's a shower which I'm tempted to use but also imagine it's a terrible idea when your balance is not on point. There's a TV mostly showing film clips of the king but also tells you if the toilet is occupied. I think the blankets might actually be big towels. I'm on top bunk. I'm not sure I'll ever get down again so the next 10 weeks of blog might be about my sleeper train adventures - well you can order the ready meals through TV.

    Tune in tomorrow for my update on trains. Edge of your seat stuff.
    Read more

  • Day 9 - Monk Chat

    February 16, 2017 in Thailand ⋅ ☀️ 27 °C

    Sleeper train update part 2 - I had a pretty good night's sleep although the train was very cold and quite noisy. There was a very shouty man chivvying us along no matter how quickly we moved. I managed to get down from the bunk using the steps of the bunk, door handle and sink so the trip continues.

    We got one of the Red Cars to the guest house that we're staying at. The red car is an odd thing. They shove as many people in as possible before they leave so you're crammed in the back going in a similar direction but not to the same destination. The guest house we're staying at is run by Paul, his wife Ay, nephew Ta and daughter Freya who's 3 and runs around getting you to play. We had a quick omelette to try and wake up then headed out to check out Chiang Mai. CM is very different from Bangkok. Much more laid back, easier to cross the roads and simpler to navigate. I eagerly checked out more temples, Matt hit the tired wall and was temple fatigued after one place so he went back to sleep and I ploughed on.

    One of the nicest temples I've been to is Wat Chedi Luang. Every temple has strict dress code instructions, especially for women. One of the little temples here wouldn't let woman in at all as we evilly menstruate. There were also wax (I hope) monks which were uncannily reallstic - see photos. On the way out of this temple I spotted a sign for Monk Chat (a scheme set up to both allow people to learn about a monk's life and for the monks to practise their English) and after hiding round the corner to decide if I was ready to face my monk phobia I went and chatting to monk Nochanh from Laos. He's been a monk for 6 years but thinks he'll quit next year to get a 'real' job. He told me about his typical day which as well as doing the expected meditating/chanting includes studying other subjects and free time spent 'looking at facebook'. We had our chat whilst he drank an ice coffee, he told me he doesn't sleep enough so powers through on caffeine - like the regular folk. I'm so happy I went to chat with him cause whilst I'm still terrified of 'bumping a monk' it made me feel I could sit a metre away without fear of being struck down.

    After the Monk Chat I went back to find Matt and we went to the nearby Kat's cafe where they proudly display only non-professional photos of their food. I had Kao Soi. Like a Thai curry with crispy noodles on the top. It's a northern Thailand speciality and who am I to not embrace the culture by eating all the food? (As a side note I think my clothes were shrunk at the laundry as I swear they're getting tighter) We hit up one more temple, Wat Phra Singh but it was so hot that even I got temple fatigued by this point so we went for cold beers and booked our next few days.

    Following a much needed warm shower to de-grub we sat in the bar of the guest house and chatted with some of the other guests and the family whilst eating. We ended up going to the Night Bazaar with Teresa and Rob, a couple from Australia/Papua New Guinea who are post-kids and travelling indefinitely - life goals! It was great fun checking out the stalls and having a few more beers. The street we walked down changed in the time we spent at the market from a normal, chilled place to banging party tunes and many girls wearing very little trying to get us in so we figured it was time to call it a night. Elephant sanctuary tomorrow 😀
    Read more

  • Day 10 - Elephant Nature Park

    February 17, 2017 in Thailand ⋅ 🌙 20 °C

    One of the best days ever today. Ever. As you'll see from Facebook we have a ton of videos and photos greater than the 6 I can post on here which will do the day much more justice than I can put into words.

    We were picked up by Pai our tour guide along with the 8 other people going to the Care for Elephants day. Elephant Nature Park are trying to save as many elephants as they can who are either in the circus, logging trees or being forced to beg on the streets. There were some who had stood on land mines now being rehabilitated. They're also trying to convince other elephant businesses to stop treating elephants cruelly and our day was spent with a business who used to offer elephant rides but have stopped to change and look after elephant's welfare instead. As an added bonus the intro video was done by Lou from Neighbour's which flew over everyone else's head on the bus (mostly Americans) but made me giggle.

    We had 4 elephants with us today - Pooki, Ma Gael, Kamoona and Lucky (the baby of the group at 4 years old). We started by feeding them watermelon, pumpkin and cucumbers. You held out the food in front of them and tucked it into their trunks. Elephants are very greedy so when you'd run out of food they'd still be trying to get into your bag for more though some are fussy and reject the cucumber for the sweet fruits instead. We were given a bag of bananas and more cucumbers and went for a walk for about an hour through the park with the elephants alongside, feeding them as we went. It's really strange walking along with a creature a hell of a lot bigger than you at your shoulder but the ones we were with were so gentle even though they'd been treated so cruelly in the past. Apart from Lucky who was donated by a guy given an elephant as a gift the older elephants were all rescued from logging.

    We left the elephants for a while and had a lovely veggie lunch in a rest stop dangling our legs above the river (plus Ovaltine. The Thais seem to love Ovaltine!) then went into the river with them and bathed them. i.e. threw buckets of water on them and dodged the poo they dropped in the river. The elephants know 1pm is bathing time and even if there's no humans with them will head to the river to wash the old mud off. Ma Gael was my buddy for the walk back - probably cause I looked like a giant watermelon. There were times I was scared of being accidentally crushed by a wrong footing but we made it.

    We left out group of elephants behind (sob) and went to meet the other families of rescued creatures at the main park. There were girls with broken ankles which had healed broken and blind ones being led around by a sighted elephant BFF, so sad, plus babies born in the park and lots of dogs and cats they'd also saved (about 600!). There are about 70 elephants in total which they've bought from other industries. It was one of the best experiences of my entire life and if you're ever in Chiang Mai I'd recommend that you go.

    This evening we went over to Flight 52 as I was craving pizza. I love Thai food but I've had it 3 meals a day since Sunday so time for a change. It's a new restaurant and run by a great Danish guy who spent a lot of time chatting with us. Amazing pizza and out fair share of two for one Mai Tais.

    All in all a perfect day. Thai cooking school tomorrow which will have a tough job topping this.
    Read more

  • Day 11 - Thai Farm Cookery School

    February 18, 2017 in Thailand ⋅ 🌙 23 °C

    Top of my list of things to do pre-trip was cookery classes. I told Matt I'd do them alone if he wasn't keen but that I was doing them regardless. Luckily the taste for cooking he's developed recently (ha!) meant he was keen (hmm) to come along.

    After literally hours of research for Chiang Mai cookery schools I chose the Thai Farm Cookery School. Our guide/teacher Garnet met us at our guest house and this started the most hilarious day I've had in ages. Garnet was beyond funny from start to finish, from shouting 'hashtag cook like a boss' in the market to showing us 'sexxxxxxy' ways to chop vegetables and doing terrible English accent impressions I hardly stopped laughing. First stop for our group of 9 (hailing from Germany, India, USA and Iceland) was a local market where Garnet showed us/explained to us different curry pastes, rice types, sauces and coconut products. We could then wander around looking at the beautiful arrays of fruit and veg and the beautiful in their own way pigs heads.

    We jumped back in the mini bus and headed to the cookery school. It's on a 2.5 acre organic farm and lots of the ingredients are grown on site. Our classroom had just 2 walls so it wasn't too stuffy whilst we were cooking in front of the farm views. Wearing hats clearly given for comedy value we did a mini farm tour tasting and smelling herbs like garlic chives and Thai basil whilst learning how they're grown - I'm definitely chucking some garlic cloves into my garden to get garlic chives but reckon I wouldn't have the same luck with growing a kaffir lime tree. We then headed back in to make our chosen colour of curry paste. Matt chose (well I chose for him) green and I chose yellow. Lots of pestle-ing later we had 'Whoooooooo PERFECT! Sexy!' curry pastes.

    Next stop was making soups. Before each dish (we made 5 today) we sat around an outside table and went through the ingredients, being shown how to prep them and then trying to memory game it back at our stations (with some help). I learnt that I'm a 1 chilli girl when it comes to Thai food but even then the Tom Yum soup I made was good, if I do say so myself. (Open invitation for any loyal readers to request I attempt it at home for you when I'm back)

    After Tom Yum came Pad Thai. I've made several Pad Thais over the years at home but it seems I'm not exactly making it in the 'genuine way'. This was proper Thai fast food and with hardly any prep and a couple of minutes cooking we were done. The hardest part in the UK will probably be finding tamarind, Thai basil and fresh galangal in Tesco! I felt full after the soup so switching to playing the long game and only ate half of mine, plus a small helping of the papaya salad Garnet made for us.

    Next up was our Thai curries using the paste we made. Again super easy and apparently we let Thai curry cook for way too long in the UK. This accompanied Thai chicken and basil, another stir fry dish which involved trying to get flames in your pan. Matt was a pro at this but I'd miss my eyebrows so focused on garnishing instead.

    Last up was dessert. We made bananas in coconut milk, though a bit more pimped up with pandan, palm sugar, sesame seeds, dried mung beans and an orchid flower garnish. Somehow I found room to eat it and get back on the bus.

    I also found room to eat about an eighth of a hundred year old egg. Not really 100 years old but eggs preserved in saline for a month until they turn black and jelly like inside. They look horrific and don't taste that great either hence the eighth. It's no delicious pickled egg.

    We spent the evening with the family who run the hostel plus some of the other guests. The family put on a BBQ but I wasn't exactly in the mood for eating. Hello bloat. It was a really nice evening to end another superb day. I don't want to leave Chiang Mai but sadly we will tomorrow for Chiang Rai and closer to the Laos border.
    Read more

  • Day 12 - Matt Gets Beaten Up By A Girl

    February 19, 2017 in Thailand ⋅ 🌙 21 °C

    Thailand has its fair share of unusual sights. Today we tried to tick off one of the Chiang Mai bucket list points of getting massage in a women's prison where they train soon to be released inmates to be masseurs so they can get a job when they are freed. Sadly despite getting there early they were booked beyond our departure bus time so we were directed to the ex-inmate massage centre round the corner. We had breakfast first with our new found friends Teresa and Rob and booked in for an hour Thai massage. We were sent to change into lovely burgundy scrubs (easier to navigate than the black pants once I got a set that wasn't 2 pairs of trousers) and laid in a communal massage room. A slightly different experience to our Bangkok essential oils and soothing music massage from last week. I think I got lucky and although my masseuse was hard on me Matt got one of the stronger ladies who gave him a bit of a beating - I couldn't possibly speculate what crime she might have committed before her prison training. I still can't not giggle when my feet are touched and at one point thought she was going to detach a limb but it was amazing, and for about £5!

    After that we checked out and said goodbye to out lovely guest house hosts Paul, Ay, Ta and Freya. (Oh I forgot Paul kindly took Matt on the back of his moped to get our bus tickets this morning, I did not volunteer for that). We caught the 3 hour bus to Chiang Rai. The bus was fine and I caught up on my sleep and podcasts but beyond that it's been a fairly quiet day. We're in a guest house which actually has a shower area as opposed to a wet room which is a nice change though still a lack of wall hooks - I wouldn't have thought I'd miss hanging things up so much.

    We went to the night bazaar where I bought some hippy trousers and found a source of wine which was neither stupidly expensive or mixed with fruit juice - oh happiness! We watched some traditional Thai acts, well some dancing, instrument playing and a guy singing Elvis covers whilst eating dinner and figuring out the next few days.
    Read more

  • Day 13 - The White Temple

    February 20, 2017 in Thailand ⋅ ⛅ 13 °C

    After a good night's sleep we got up semi-early (7am) as we're getting the hang of of dodging the bigger crowds at popular temples. We caught the bus to Chiang Rai's biggest draw, the White Temple. The bus itself was a fun experience with electric fans attached to the ceiling to act as air con, the doors being left open throughout and half the bus being filled with luggage.

    The White Temple is unlike any other in Thailand. As the name suggests, it's almost all white. Apart from the gold toilet block which is, you've guessed it, gold. It's also pretty creepy and I'm sure JK Rowling must have visited before she wrote The Deathly Hallows as there were a lot of creepy reaching hands etc. There were demon monuments showing that whisky and cigarettes are bad, skulls and scary heads all over the show and ghoulish guards which was a contrast to the temple which a Disney princess could have lived in. We wandered around for the requisite temple admiring time before an Ovaltine pit stop for me, and Matt's seemingly 7th coffee of the day. We checked out the free gallery of the temple designer's other artistic work which was phenomenally varied from satire of George Bush and Bin Laden on a rocket together entitled 'Love' to a black and white sketch of York. Then we experience true Chiang Rai life with a squished in journey in a blue Songthaew. It's like an open backed van with benches down either side that comfortably fits 8 but uncomfortably fits 12 which is the most common number to fill it with. Always nice to be sweatily attached to a stranger.

    We grabbed lunch at Hungry Wolf's. I chose it because the owner is super sassy to bad trip advisor reviewers, not that there was many of them. We had huge burgers and milkshakes so look forward to seeing me twice the size when I'm home. After that we caught the bus to Chiang Khong. It was like the temple bus except with even more people and packages and took 2 hours. Luckily we got 2 of the back seats behind the luggage so actually a bit more room and the breeze from the back door in our faces. I get on fine as I'm quite short but Matt finds these rides tougher.

    Chiang Khong is very small and laid back. It's a town where people come to spend one night before crossing the border to Laos (which we're going tomorrow). I really like it. The guest house owners are beyond friendly and we have a balcony with a gorgeous Mekong river view. We took a walk down the river and had a random but delicious Mexican meal (it's not been an authentic food day).

    New country tomorrow, Laos. As long as we get through immigration 🙂
    Read more

  • Day 14 - Slow Boating Down The Mekong

    February 21, 2017 in Laos ⋅ ⛅ 29 °C

    We had the warmest goodbye from the Day Waterfront Guest House in Chiang Khong which involved the couple who owned it forcing bananas on us for our journey and waving away our tuk tuk to the port like family members.

    Leaving Thailand and entering Laos is a mix of straightforward and faffy. You do Thai immigration, buy a bus ticket where the price is based on an eye ball of how big your luggage is, bus to Laos immigration which involves your passport disappearing through one window and reappearing 20 minutes later through another after dollars have exchanged hands. Then another tuk tuk to the slow boat which will carry us over the next 2 days from Houey Xay to Luang Prabang. Today was the Houey Xay to Pak Bang leg. Our tour guide is Mr Wong. His English is...ok. But he does use about 10 sentences of ramble where 2 would do which makes for some confusion. And says 'same same but different' a lot.

    There were about 30 of us on a long boat that's for a max of 40. Seeing as I'm anti social and don't like forced chat with strangers, especially for a whole day, I was delighted I managed to look surly enough to put anyone else off sitting in our booth. See photos for a pic of the boat but there are central booths, a seating area at the back and a flat you can sit on at the front. The scenery was stunning the whole journey passing lots of other boats, fishermen, cows etc and I was very happy catching up with my book/napping in between staring off the sides.

    We stopped at a local village on the way to Pak Beng. To be honest I didn't like it. The village was obviously not rich and the company give 2% of profits to the village in the form of clothes and school equipment so they gain in a way from it but it felt very voyeuristic. It was like going to a zoo but the exhibits were people. There were 2 boat tours visiting this small village at once, and I imagine others come every day, and the villagers didn't look thrilled as some of our group were leaning on their houses and taking close up pictures of their children. It was interesting to see another life less financially privileged but just made me unhappy that it has to be this way. A bit dose of perspective.

    After that we got back on the boat and had lunch which was very food considering it's mass catering on a boat. I then had a nice nap but realised I should probably go sit at the front and appreciate the view. Matt was already there with a beer in hand. We travelled till about 4.30 and after some more Mr Wong confusing rambles we got to the right hotel. And we even eventually got to the right room after assuming a key with 1 and 0 on it meant room 10, which was actually already occupied, not room 1 which was our actual room. Silly us. It's an interesting room. Dark wood walls and our first mosquito nets of the trip but also the first hot shower. The view from the balcony is awesome across the Mekong. We went to the bar next door for a pre dinner beer. I think it might have actually been someone's house that they've stuck some tables in and laminated a menu. We saw an elephant though on the opposite bank as the sun set and beer is about a £1 for a mega bottle so we'll take it. Dinner was a random set menu at the hotel included with the room which we ate on a forced shared table with a couple from Halifax but I survived.

    Another day on the boat tomorrow. If we make good time we can make a stop in whisky town. Whoop whoop!
    Read more

  • Day 15 - I Heart LP (They Have Wine)

    February 22, 2017 in Laos ⋅ 🌙 20 °C

    A short entry today seeing as I spent a large chunk of the day on the boat.

    After a restless night where I kept waking up in a panic that I'd missed the slow boat we actually did wake up on time and catch our prompt 7.45am departure towards Luang Prabang. It was really cold on the boat but luckily Mr Wong had blankets and was full of bants about us being so drunk we thought a 1 was a 10 on our room key yesterday. Hilarious. Most of the morning was spent reading and watching downloaded Netflix trash (basically my life at home) whilst waiting for lunch. The scenery was equally beautiful to yesterday once the fog cleared and I tried to spend as much of the afternoon as I could sitting on the front.

    First stop on the boat was to the Pak Ou caves. Basically caves with thousands of Buddha statues in them and impressive. You needed a torch for the top caves which were up 226 steps and pitch black inside. Second stop was to 'whisky village' where they making 15% and 50% rice wine and sell to tourists. Obvs we bought some plus I finally graduated to the travellers uniform of elephant trousers. As unstylish as they are comfortable.

    At about half 4 we made in to Luang Prabang and said goodbye to Mr Wong. Our guest house welcomed us with a strange drink and fruit platter before we walked into town. First impressions - I love Luang Prabang. It's small and laid back. There's a night market selling more clothes and trinkets where I could easily buy everything plus a cooked food market sent from heaven which I fully intend to gorge on for the next few days. Here's buffet stalls! And there's wine and it was on happy hour 😍 We did food like locals (/travellers who want to pretend to be locals) sitting at a street food noodle stall with baskets of herbs as condiments and had more beer before calling it an early one in prep for our next few days here. I think I'm going to like it here.
    Read more

  • Day 16 - £1 Cocktails

    February 23, 2017 in Laos ⋅ 🌙 22 °C

    We started the day fairly lazily with breakfast and more magically appearing fruit at the guest house before venturing into our first day of Luang Prabang proper. We started with the Traditional Arts and Ethnology Centre where we learnt about some of the diffident cultural groups in Laos with a focus on their clothing. There was a whole room about beads and a corner, possibly intended for children, where you could try on outfits.

    Matt then went for a massage to try and recover from his ex-prisoner massage. I meanwhile sat in a hammock drinking juice. It's so hot in LP (about 34degrees) so I'm a mega sweaty mess and was grateful for an air conditioned lunch. I must find a recipe for Larb (also known as Larp) when I get home. It's a delicious minced chicken dish with lots of fresh herbs.

    After a brownie pitstop we went to the UXO Lao centre. UXO stands for Unexploded Ordnance. During the early to mid 20th century Laos was the most heavily bombed country per capita due to its proximity with Vietnam. About a third of the bombs (80million) didn't explode and every day they're found by people, especially children, across Laos causing fatally and injury. It was a very sobering exhibit and extremely sad.

    We came back to the guest house for some more trip planning then ventured out to the food part of the market. It's very hectic but we managed to muscle our way to pork dumplings, spring rolls and skewers of BBQ sausage and chicken. The chicken especially was exceptional. We'll be back every night!

    We'll also probably be back at Lao Lao Garden most nights. After a detour for happy hour wine we came to LLG on a recommendation of a friend. Local spirit cocktails are 2-4-20k Kip (about £2) and several 'welcome shots' were thrown in. We've made it home pre-local curfew (11.30pm) as we have another cooking class tomorrow (Matt is thrilled) but I'm sure we'll be back there.
    Read more

  • Day 17 - Jeow and Laap

    February 24, 2017 in Laos ⋅ ⛅ 25 °C

    Another country, another cooking class Matt's dragged along to. Today our Laos cuisine class was with the Tamarind Cookery school. As it seems is standard for these now (well 2 for 2 so far) first stop was a trip to a local food market. Laos cuisine is pretty different from Thai food, mostly in the range of ingredients used. In Laos there's a huge emphasis on herbs - mint, coriander and dill all feature heavily. It's very much a food culture of nothing being wasted, including the blood and bile. Yummy. They'll also eat anything, there were stalls selling squirrel, rats and bats (not part of our cookery experience today though). Laos is land locked and it's only in living memory that a lot of the road connections with its neighbour's were made so there's a lot of self sufficiency.

    Our guide today was Sit. He was good fun and clearly very keen to improve his already pretty decent English. After the market we went to the pretty Tamarind cooking pavilion. Today was slightly different than our Thai equivalent class as we only ate once really rather than in between courses. They also served us booze mid (morning) class. First up we made jeow, a spicy dipping sauce. I made an aubergine one and Matt tomato. Most of the dishes today involved doing some aspect over hot coals, for this one it was scorching the ingredient skins. You can eat jeow with anything but it's popular with sticky rice at breakfast and I'll definitely be making it at home.

    Round 2 was making a fish parcel. We pummelled herbs, garlic and chilli in a pestle and mortar to make a paste which we marinated our fish in before making a banana leaf parcel - Sit made it look easier than it was but we made a valiant effort. This went into the fire whilst we made chicken stuffed lemongrass. Yes that is the right way round, we stuffed chicken into lemongrass. It involved careful, patient cutting of the lemongrass into a lantern style so obviously not my forte but we got there in the end. We dipped it into egg and deep fried it over the fire.

    Last savoury dish was Laap (or Larp, or Larb) which yesterday I said I wanted to learn to make. We did the beef version, with an option to add bile to make it bitter. I declined. It was very easy to make so it'll be coming to a UK BBQ soon. We sat down together to eat it all and get over-full before making a black sticky rice dessert with fruit. Very straight forward and somehow managed to eat it before rolling home.

    Afternoons are unbearably hot here for two pasty northerners so we sat in the air con for a few hours before wandering out along the Mekong river as finding a bar to drink mojitos as the sun went down. We did a mini bar crawl along the river, briefly stopping and quickly leaving a bar where the fly covered toilet was off the kitchen and you washed your hands in the kitchen sink. We went back to the food market for more BBQ chicken and papaya salad before calling it a night as we want an early start at Kuang Si waterfalls tomorrow.
    Read more

  • Day 18 - Do go chasing waterfalls

    February 25, 2017 in Laos ⋅ 🌙 -8 °C

    Apologies to Helen’s legion of followers but it's Matt doing the blog today. Thought it's about time I had a go and also to prove I'm still here and that Helen didn't leave me on the slow boat so she could spend all our money on cooking classes and the rest of her time geocaching.

    So today we went to the famous (ish) Kuang Si Falls. It's towards the top of any Luang Prabang to do list and we decided to employ our usual strategy of getting up a bit earlier to try and beat the crowds. Meant we were up at 7 and out the door not long after to try and negotiate a Tuk Tuk to take us up there. It's about a 40 min drive away. Safe to say neither of us will be getting the call to lead the Brexit negotiations any time soon and after some half arsed bartering I realised we were arguing over about 2 quid extra so the deal was done. We'd agreed a price (220k Kip which is about £22, everytime you go to the ATM here you're a millionaire) for the driver to take us up there and then wait for about 5 hrs to take us back. We'd paid a bit more so we had the Tuk Tuk to ourselves and weren't relying on other people holding us up but more on that later.

    Anyway after a typically bumpy (and speedy) drive up there we arrived about 8.30. You pay around £2 each to get in and randomly the first thing you see is a bear sanctuary where a number of bears have been rescued from poachers (their stomach bile is valuable in Chinese medicine apparently). There were loads of them just lying about and chilling out, they all looked very calm which was good as at least one of the fences looked very jumpable if they'd put their minds to it.

    The falls itself are over three levels and were absolutely beautiful. I'll put a few more pics on FB but they really don't do it justice. The pools on the first couple of levels are the best for swimming in and getting up early paid off as we were able to to swim about with only a handful of other people about. The water is the turquoise colour due to the water running over limestone. It was very clear and no nasties in there apart from a few little fish swimming about, meant you could get a free fish spa if you stood still long enough (we didn't).

    After spoiling a recently arrived tour parties perfect pictures by swimming in front of the waterfall for a while it was up to the next level. More of the same but less chance for swimming. Once you reach the third level you can trek up to the top of the fall itself which we did. Bit steep at times but worth it, there was another pool with a swing over it as well as a great view down the main fall itself. Glad we swam in the water before seeing what colour it is before the limestone gets involved.

    After a quick rest we decided to hike further up to the spring and cave right at the top. It was about 3km and hilly but again definitely worth it. There was a ‘restaurant’ at the spring which was basically a BBQ and a hut. Food was very good though, (the street food in Laos has been brilliant so far). There was another pool to swim in and unfortunately a rope swing and long log covering the pool that you could try and walk over. Obviously I tried both with Helen (quite sensibly) trying neither. Firstly I swung out on the rope planning to let go at the top of the arc and drop in to the cool water below. Got the angle all wrong and if I'd let go would have dropped on the long log so had to hold on and swing back to the bank where I bumped in to a tree while a French family and the guys working on the BBQ looked on, smooth. Undeterred I tried to walk across the log, twice, and got about a quarter of the way both times before falling in. By this point Helen had had enough and had gone to look at some butterflies.

    We then went a bit further up to the Hermit cave. They're very keen on putting buddha statues in pitch black caves in this part of the world and this was more of the same. You hired a flashlight before you went in and it was very dark and a bit creepy and then the flash light reflected on the bald head of meditating monk, momentary panic followed in case we disturbed him or Helen bumped him but turned out it was another of the weird wax works of long deceased monks. We didn't stay long after that.

    We smugly hiked right back down to where we started (we covered 12k in total today and the equivalent of 68 flights up). Smugly as it was very busy and the pool we'd had virtually to ourselves was packed. We then made a quick stop at the butterfly park near the entrance to the falls. It's ran by a Dutch couple, it was quite good but got us thinking what prompts you so say ‘I'm moving to Laos to open a butterfly park’. Anyway it was back to the Tuk Tuk rendezvous point where our driver was playing cards with his mates and told us he was waiting for some other customers before we could set off, turns out he'd dropped us off and hot footed it back to town to charge another group for the exclusive use of his Tuk Tuk. Shouldn't be surprised and wouldn't have mattered if some of the other group hadn't gone AWOL. After sitting in the back of the Tuk Tuk in 35 degree heat for half an hour the driver came back and said we'd have to go back with his mate in another Tuk Tuk with six other people but still wanted the full fare. We managed to get a bit of a discount but we're hot and hungry so in we got. To be fair had we not set off then we'd have missed what was honestly a boy no older than ten driving a truck loaded up with the local beer, Beerlao! Quite a sight.

    We picked up some food and then had our now customary couple of hours back in the room with the air con. After eating a lot of street food recently we decided to eat out proper and Helen found a tapas place that did a mixture of Laos and international food. It was delicious, one of the best places we've eaten so far. After that it was back home early as per.

    We're huge fans of Laos and Luang Prabang in particular. It's such a nice place and so relaxed, we’ll be sad to leave. Close run thing between here and Chiang Mai for my favourite place so far. Last full day in LP tomorrow before we fly to Vientiane Monday and then on to Hanoi on Tuesday.

    We've had some more laundry done and they must wash it on 90 degrees as everything is getting smaller but my waistline is also undoubtedly getting bigger. We have over eight weeks left and if both these trends continue worried I'll have to replace everything with the elasticated hippy pants (usually with elephants on) that are so popular with the many gap year types we've seen.

    Anyway enough of my ramblings, normal service will be resumed tomorrow with Helen back to tell you about our rice farm experience day.
    Read more

  • Day 19 - Rice is Life

    February 26, 2017 in Laos ⋅ ⛅ 28 °C

    I'm back! Don't worry, there may have been some speculation that Matt had sold me for Beer Lao and taken over but it was unfounded. I'm sure he'll be back to guest edit again soon - or he'll start a rival blog...

    Today we went to the Living Land experience to learn how to be rice farmers. A tuk tuk came to get us at 8am and after a bumpy 15 minutes we arrived and were given hats to wear - the hats were probably the most painful bit of the whole affair. Our guide today was La, a funny and kind guy who has been at Living Land farm for 6 years. The rice growing part of the farm is only run for food to support the 7 families who co-work it, the rice isn't sold on. As Lao people eat a lot of rice (every meal) the production is still large. The profits from the tour days helps to cover the costs of teaching 75 children in the local area English and about nature for free.

    Before we went through the 14 stages of sticky rice production we learnt some other important skills. First up was weaving. On the farm this is done to make baskets etc but we weaved something that was supposed to be resemble a donkey. Mine was mostly done by the expert weaver helping with the session. He couldn't speak English and I can't speak Lao but laughter is universal so I understood what he thought of my weaving skills. (He was a retired farmer who found retirement boring so came back to teach idiots like me to weave. I didn't get that from his laughter code, La told us. Though he didn't call me an idiot) Next skill was blacksmithing to make tools, we were allowed to pump the fire but not to play with the hammer.

    Then it was on to the paddy fields.

    Step 1 - selecting the seeds
    Basically you put an egg in a barrel. It'll sink. Then you pour in salt till in floats, remove the egg (give it to grandma) and put the seeds in. The good seeds will sink, less good float. The bad ones are given to the animals and the good ones rinsed for...

    Step 2 - planting the seeds
    Time to get dirty! We got knee deep into the soft mud and water and prayed not to fall over. La told us about a woman who fell in and multiple staff members had to work together to pull her out. I didn't need that shame. Actually we ended up at this stage also harvesting the seedlings for step 4.

    Step 3 - ploughing the field
    The most comedy step - see photo. It involved getting back into the mud and holding the plough whilst Rudolf the water buffalo pulled the plough around. He understands 3 commands - go, stop and turn. Luckily La and another farmer were in with us to help with the instruction as I'm not entirely sure our variations on the work 'hey!' Were actually the go command. Every lap and person change Rudolf would start very slowly but when he knew he was towards the end would speed up. This coincided with when the ground got more uneven but luckily no muddy casualties.

    Step 4/5 - planting and watering the seedlings
    Our carefully pulled up seedlings needed to be separated and planted separately, again in the muddy water. It's a clever system where all the fields are height staggered and by digging or closing channels you can flow water from top to bottom. The top level is fed by a waterfall.

    Step 6 - harvesting
    When the leaves dry out and turn yellow it's time to go. Funnily enough they did not let us loose with sickles so this was an observing step. Unlike...

    Step 7/8 - thrashing and wafting
    Using nunchucks we whacked bundles of harvested crop against a wooden board so the rice grains fall out. Lots of grassy bits and debris fall into the rice pile to so you then waft them with a paddle to blow the loose bits from the pile and leave the heavier grains.

    Step 9 - packing and carrying
    We tried out 3 different ways to carrying the rice. Two baskets on a plank over your shoulder, on your back and with the strap around your forehead (wtf?!). We only tried with a little bit of rice but when full it'd be about 60kg and can be carried for hours!

    Step 10 - husking
    Using a big foot powered pestle and mortar the husks of the rice are removed. It takes about an hour to do a kilo of rice so everyone on the farm has strong legs!

    Step 11 - separating the husks and grains
    The husks and grains are put into a basket and you shake and toss the basket so the lighter husks fly off. Apparently it's a 'ladies' job' and if you're rubbish at it you'll never find a husband as it means you're lazy. Matt was rubbish at it so he'll never get a husband.

    Bonus Step 11B - grinding
    Some of the rice is ground to make rice flour for noodles etc. This is a 2 person job involved an arm powered grinder. Again it takes about an hour per kilo to get it fine enough so at least the strong legs are balanced by strong arms

    Step 12/13 - soaking and steaming
    The rice needs to be soaked for at least 3 hours to take out excess starch. It's then rinsed a few times before being put into one of the baskets the weavers make to steam over a fire.

    Step 14 - eating :)
    After a tour of the vegetable garden we ate an array of rice goodies. Sticky rice obviously, then lotus flowers and rolls made from rice flour and sweet rice cookies. All with a super spicy dip of course. We were really hungry by this point after our farmer pretence so the food didn't last long.

    All that was left was for us to get our certificates (Perfect for the CV) and catch our tuk tuk back.

    The rest of the day was spent eating, looking for somewhere to print our flight tickets for tomorrow, trying to find a working ATM (lucky number 7!) and me buying used napkins from a restaurant cause I liked the design. A 5am alarm tomorrow to go to Vientiane, the capital of Laos.
    Read more

  • Day 20 - Monster of Concrete

    February 27, 2017 in Laos ⋅ ⛅ 26 °C

    A 5am wake up call to head to Luang Prabang airport. Matt began to get the stress shakes when he realised none of the coffee selling establishments were open at 5.50am when we arrived yet though his panic didn't last too long. Though the souvenir gift stands opened first. That's multiple stands, for a small airport where the man on security also directed us to our plane by vaguely pointing to 'the middle plane' before we wandered freely over the tarmac. I'm not sure his security skills were up to much either as I made the machine beep, took of my shoes, beeped again and he shrugged and let me go.

    A short flight mostly spent killed mosquitos with the in flight magazine and we landed in Vientiane. We've gone slightly more upmarket here and spent a whopping £35 on an actual hotel so we had a driver to pick us. Much appreciated to avoid the early morning tuk tuk bargaining and they let us check in early.

    We soon headed out though as what we've learnt about Laos is its unbearably hot after about 2pm. First stop was a cafe for a second breakfast (mmm croissants) then a general wander. Minor mishap in that someone tripped off a curb and hurt their ankle. And it wasn't me! It's not too bad he says, hobbling on. We went on regardless and walked through Chao Anouvong Park, named after the man of the same name in the statue that's there. We also saw a pick up truck drive past pumping out music with a big gold Buddha and a monk on the back - hastily taken picture in the photo section.

    We went round a couple of temples on the way back as it's been at least a week since we went in one. As they say frequently in Laos (it's even on t-shirts) 'Same Same but Different'. Though one temple was having the painted wall murals painstakingly restored which was interesting to watch. No photos allowed though to 'prevent thefts and schemes'.

    Next stop was lunch at a place called Noy's Fruit Heaven. We had lovely smoothies and pittas. There was however a very sad eyed dog watching us eat and breaking my heart. The guys who worked there obviously felt the same as they went and got him half a white baguette (that famous doggie treat). He turned his nose up at that but enjoyed a piece of mayonnaise covered chicken Matt dropped.

    Last stop before heading back to the hotel was the Patuxai which is a war memorial looking not unlike the Arc de Triomphe - ironic seeing as it's commemorate the war to get independence from French rule. The very honest signage calls it a 'monster of concrete'. I actually like the monster though and we climbed to the top for view over the city (after we passed the ton of souvenir stalls on the way up).

    Air con and pool time followed before heading out to dinner at 'Sticky Fingers'. Margaritas and surprisingly good bangers and mash were the order of the day. That and listening to the sound from across the street from a stall where you had to try and pop balloons with darts - tuneful. When the noise got too much we traipsed through the night market to look at all the knock off goods and found another bar which had reasonably priced red wine.
    Read more

  • Day 21 - Kraft Cheese and Hot Dogs

    March 1, 2017 in Laos ⋅ 🌙 21 °C

    A brief entry today as it's a transit day so we've spent a good chunk of it on the move.

    We started our day with a 'classy' hotel breakfast. It featured hot dog sausages and kraft cheese slices beautifully rolled. We thought we'd make the most of it so had about 4 courses each. We sadly said goodbye to our nice air con room and as we'd be room-less for the day tried to find some cooler activities.

    First we found a geocache of course. Then we walked to the COPE (Cooperative Orthotic and Prosthetic Enterprise) centre. Similar to the UXO centre in Luang Prabang part of it was the harrowing stories of the unexplored cluster bombs in Laos but there's more of a focus on how they support anyone in Laos who's missing a limb or has a deformity for whatever reason to get assistance. There were some beautiful videos and stories about how COPE go into rural communities to find those who need help, measure them for prosthetics and get them to a city to fit them and give them rehabilitation plus lots of examples of the prosthetics people had made for themselves before getting help. A must visit for anyone in Vientiane.

    Needing somewhere to escape the afternoon heat we went to the cinema. Sadly the English audio choices were limited to one option so John Wick Chapter 2 it was. What a load of rubbish. The first one was good, this one was 5 minutes of story per 30 minutes of runny, smashy, killy stupidity. We did pay the extra 80p (so £4 total) to sit in the premium seats, or the 'honeymoon' seats as they're called. Weird. They seemed no different from the normal seats and there were only 6 people in the screen so we probably could have sat there anyway. A very late lunch at the shopping centre where the cinema was we headed back to catch our taxi to the airport

    Vientiane airport is a small, basic airport but with the nicest fridge magnets I've seen all trip. I knew it was worth hanging out for a good one! (When buying a magnet makes the blog you know it's a slow news day). A quick flight took us to Hanoi. After some minor visa confusion where no one seemed to recognise the visa we had despite it being the one the British government website directed me at we were allowed through and are now at our hostels. Let's see what Vietnam brings!
    Read more

  • Day 22 - Mopeds Mopeds Everywhere

    March 1, 2017 in Vietnam ⋅ ⛅ 16 °C

    Hello Hanoi! We had a food tour booked at 11am so went on a quick explore after breakfast. We walked to the lake which should be an easy 5 minutes away but with our scaredy-cat ways of crossing the road it took about 10 hesitant minutes (this would soon change).

    Hanoi is a lot colder than anywhere we went to in Thailand and Laos so it's back to converse and hoodies, but less suncream which is a happy consequence of the drop in temperature. The lake was pretty grey and misty. We crossed over the little red bridge to the temple with its giant tortoise statue before heading back to the hostel to await our tour guide. We were really lucky as it was just the two of us on the tour with our guide Jacelyn. This meant a more personalised experience and made it much easier to get seats in the busy Hanoi eateries. We ate/drank:

    1. Bún chả - BBQ'd pork and veg in broth. You get a side of noodles, garlic, chilli and herbs to mix in. The place we went to sit was down an alley and run by a lady who was bored being retired so just serves drinks and let's people sit in there with street food (like us). We never would have found this, or most of the places in fairness.

    2. Bánh xèo - a pancake filled with meat and vegetables. You wrap lettuce around it, add basil and dip it into a dipping sauce.

    3. Bún bò - beef and noodle soup

    4. Bánh cuốn - a wide rice noodle filled with pork and mushrooms. Like a slippery spring roll. We sat on tiny stools on the street on a busy corner whilst the women who worked there churned out the noodles - it was cool to watch but no idea how it's done.

    5. Bánh mì - a baguette filled with pâté, ham, veg and herbs - my favourite dish of the trip.

    6. Bún ngan nhàn - duck and noodle soup

    7. A bonus stop for some little cakes to go with...

    8. Cà phê trứng - egg coffee, or for me egg cocoa. Literally coffee/cocoa with an egg in it. It's served over a little tealight and surprisingly delicious.

    Jacelyn was so lovely and chatted to us about her life as a tour guide and growing up in the Vietnamese countryside then moving to the city. I have no idea how they would have managed the tour with 8 (the max number) as it was hard enough to herd the two of us around. But at least now we know how to cross the road - just walk and the mopeds will drive around you as they all go really slowly.

    After we said bye to Jacelyn we headed to the Women's Museum which has exhibits on women's lives in Vietnam from marriage to education to having children as well as their contribution to the wars and some important beliefs like Mother Goddess. It was really interesting, I took pics of a couple of the things I learnt - like in some cultures machetes are common wedding gifts and that some people give their babies ugly names so spirits won't steal them. It was a great museum to spend a few hours but we totally hit the wall and negotiated crossing all the roads with our new found road crossing skills to come back to freshen up.

    We had dinner at a Pho place round the corner. It is a bizarre place in that they had 10 staff for a restaurant which seats around 30 people. None of them were particularly working hard or even working at all in some cases, except the chef in the open kitchen and even he gave up after a while and came to sit on his phone. We had to ask for drinks twice as they all got distracted by someone opening a bag of sweets. The Pho was nice though and as I'd (obviously) researched the place before we went I knew to ask for the secret off menu savoury donuts to dip in. One more beer before home and we're now anxiously awaiting the return of our laundry. We leave early doors tomorrow for a boat trip around Ha Long Bay for a few days so if the laundry doesn't come I might have to fashion pants out of unworn socks.

    Not sure how available wifi will be so the next blog might be a couple of days away. And I love getting comments on the blog but I only see who they're from if you register otherwise it just says 'Someone commented... etc' so if you don't want to register (that's cool) please sign off on your comments so I know who to feel love towards :)
    Read more

  • Day 23 - Ha Long Bay

    March 3, 2017 in Vietnam ⋅ ⛅ 30 °C

    After the laundry cliffhanger yesterday just to assure you we got most of the laundry back minus 4 pairs of Matt's socks so we can survive the next few days.

    We left the hostel early doors and got picked up by a bus to take us to Ha Long bay, a Unesco world heritage site about 4 hours away from Hanoi which is basically hundreds of tall rock formations/islands in the sea. It's very beautiful and we'll spend most of the next 3 days in this area. Our guide is named Tiger. He's been doing Ha Long tours for 10 years and has got his patter nailed, though he does deliver at about 100 words per second so I only caught about 20% of the Vietnamese history and culture lesson he gave us on the drive up here. There's 18 of us in the group and I feel sorry for the non-native English speakers as they must have got 5% if they were lucky.

    For night number 1 we're staying on a boat. It's really nice, and has an astroturfed sun deck which reminds me of my fake grass garden. Though it's not actually very warm up here (makes it even more like home I suppose). We had a huge and delicious lunch when we got on board, squid, shrimp, salads (i.e. All the things the travel nurse told me we shouldn't eat abroad - though don't worry mum, I'm writing this 24 hours later and I'm still alive). We needed a big lunch as next we went kayaking around some of the islands. Those of you who know me well might know I'm pretty terrified of being underwater, of more accurately being thrown under large expanses of outdoor water - I can cope with the pool at Center Parcs - so combine that with Matt and I being rubbish at anything involving teamwork and steering and I spent the first 20 minutes panicking every time a small wave hit us. We got into the groove though once I convinced myself we might not actually tip up and then it was fun. The best part was seeing monkeys on the cliffs right near our boat, though momentary panic that one might jump on to the boat and push me out. All normal and rational fears.

    We got back on the boat and sailed to Surprising Cave. There's typically 600 boats in Ha Long Bay at any one time, of which 400 are day trippers. As our tour guide is experienced in this neck of the woods he timed it so we went not long before closing meaning we got the caves almost to ourselves. They're really impressive, and someone who'd had too much beer has named most of the stalactites and stalagmites after what they look like, e.g. chicken laying an egg, happy Buddha smiling at a lady. With a bit of squinting I kind of got it but it was a bit magic eye.

    Back on the boat for happy hour - though Mr Hung the bar man made it happy hour pretty much every hour we were on the boat so lots of cocktails (with generous spirit measures) were consumed over the course of the evening. We were all starving by this point so it was lucky it was spring roll making time. I like this tour company, they seem to read my hungry mind with when to produce snacks. Needless to say our spring rolls were more like burritos but still tasty. Dinner wasn't too far behind - lots more sea food. Tiger showed us magic tricks and brain teasers after dinner, my years of being a geeky brain teaser obsessed child paid off cause I solved one and won a beer. I knew they weren't wasted years!

    What was a waste of time though was we had a go at squid fishing. In hindsight I think it was a task given to us to keep us occupied in the evening as none of us caught anything after an hour of trying. You chucked a green lure and hook over board then just pulled it up and down to try and attract them. Not a nibble. We gave up in the end and went to sleep in our cabin ready for day 2 tomorrow.
    Read more

  • Day 24 - Rock The Cat Ba

    March 4, 2017 in Vietnam ⋅ ☀️ 11 °C

    Last night out tour guide Tiger suggested that some people like to get up to watch the sun rise and if we did to set our alarms for 5.45. I happily would have taken the extra sleep time but Matt wanted to get up to watch and I hate missing out so for fear of it being the best sun rise ever I got up. Lesson learnt - always listen to your gut and stay in bed. It was really cloudy so we didn't see anything. Grumpily we went to breakfast at 7am. Luckily there was cheese spread and fried eggs which perked me up considerably plus gave us the energy we needed to climb to the viewing point at Ti Top island, the first stop of our day.

    The walk up was 425 steps - I know, I counted. And to be honest the view was nice but as it was cloudy it wasn't the best. But being positive there was a geocache up there - my first proper one in Vietnam. On the way back down two Chinese ladies also stopped me and took it in turns to have pictures with me and my sweaty face. I hope I adorn a photo album or even better a prime wall position some day soon.

    After this everyone doing the 2 night tour swapped boats and say bye to the 1 nighters. The new boat isn't a sleeper boat and a bit less glamorous (no fake grass anyway) but still has beer of course. We sailed for a while to Cat Ba island. The island is fairly large, around 13000 people live there and in the summer apparently gets packed out. We picked up some bikes which have seen better days, stocked up on water and cycled for about 20 minutes to a small village. I've not cycled in about 5 years so took a while to get back into the swing of it (and I'm now pretty saddle sore) but Matt was happy on his. There were many hazards and distractions like dogs sleeping in the road, electric carts using the roads and random goats walking along to negotiate. First stop was for rice wine. We started with a hibiscus rice wine, all nice and normal. Flowers in with the wine, great. Then we moved on to snake rice wine. So rice wine with about 10-15 dead snakes in it. That they leave in the jar. Just vile (see photos).

    A further 5 minute cycle (luckily not too drunk from the wine) we left the bikes and went for a trek through the jungle for an hour. We saw a tiny squirrel and went through a bat cave - though luckily the bats spend dry season elsewhere. There was some cool formations full of snail shells from when the sea level was higher and filled the cave. After some easy rock climbing with the drifting sounds of people in the village doing karaoke (at 12.30pm) we got back on the bikes and cycled back to the boat for a well needed lunch. I ate a Vietnamese special of teeny tiny prawns (Matt won't eat prawns of any size) which felt a bit grim for some reason. After lunch we had the option of kayaking again around the boat but we were all tired and lethargic so napped on the sun deck of the boat. Matt decided to jump in from the top deck a few times with mixed success (see video on Facebook...). Then it was time to carry on sailing around Cat Ba to the main built up town.

    We met for dinner and headed to a place one of Tiger's friend's owns. You would never, ever find it if you didn't know it existed despite it being large. It was down a couple of alleys, up some metal steps and into a really big, bare room with plastic chairs and a small BBQ in the corner. It was a hot pot restaurant so each table had a couple of gas stoves on them to cook your fresh sea food. They brought over a cooler of beer and more rice wine. The rice wine was in a re-used big water bottle, the Vietnamese equivalent of home brew. Tiger and Thuy cooked the barely dead crabs (I think I saw a couple move), squid, clams and prawns for us as well as some fish, tofu and veg. It was all delicious once you figured out how to eat it. It was an unusual place, very much a casual affair. While we were eating a group of women came in to practise singing, apparently in preparation for a performance at International Women's Day celebrations. When you needed the toilet you were taken to the person who owns the restaurant's house and I literally went through the bedroom of an old man in bed watching TV to use the loo. When Matt went another old man got kicked out of the bathroom whilst he was brushing his teeth. Quite the experience. And all for about £5 each. As were the draft beers we had on the way home - about 30p a pint! Needless to say we're having a great time on this tour.
    Read more

  • Day 25 - Beer Corner

    March 4, 2017 in Vietnam ⋅ 🌫 20 °C

    I am covered in bites. I have no idea what's bitten me or when but they're all over me. Tiger reckons a flea got into my clothes. They're not too itchy but it's a bit grim to think about.

    Anyway, an underwhelming breakfast at the hotel and on to the bus to the boat. A delayed started as a hotel staff member ran down to say there was a towel missing from one of of the rooms a group of young hungover guys were staying in and one had left 'pants and 2 pens' so we had to sort all that out. Eventually we got going and were back on the little boat. The morning was all about sailing through Ha Long Bay to shore again. It was beautiful and relaxing, we were sad to leave. 4 hours on the bus back (via a rest stop which also sold some interesting statues) we arrived in Hanoi.

    We're staying at a different place from when we left Hanoi (the old place smelt of damp). We were welcomed by some good ol' towel sculptures which is always a good sign. Both of us were ravenous though so after a quick pharmacy visit for anti-histamines (whoo) we went to Chops for massive burgers and loads of sides. Sadly we were sitting next to the most irritating American girl I've even encountered who kept asking what we were eating and generally loving the sound of her own voice. At least the burgers were amazing!

    As I've dragged Matt to so many cookery places I thought it only fair to watch the football with him. Lucky for me there was a random band playing traditional music outside so I could check that out. Post-football we kept walking and found another band doing rock covers in the street. A random older lady was going for it dancing in front of them loving life. Then we headed to Beer Corner. A street corner where there's hundreds of small stools outside bars and you just sit and drink beer. Inventive name then for it. I have no idea how they manage the bills as the stools aren't fixed and are just plonked wherever you want and they had one guy with a wad of money and tickets managing the whole operation. Apparently if the police come along everyone has to move as having outdoor seating isn't allowed here and the businesses have to pack the stools away for 5 minutes until they go. Luckily that didn't happen, though there was a guy walking up and down with a megaphone singing 'Hello, hello, hello' to the what sounded like the tune of Auld Land Syne. I don't think he was a law enforcer.
    Read more