Story time: The Revenge

Remember when Denise tried to kill me on that six-mile hike? Turns out revenge is sweetest when it’s completely accidental.

We decided to hike to Arethusa Falls in New Hampshire. Along the way was a side trail to Frankenstein Cliffs. “It only adds about 2 miles,” I said. “And we get extra waterfalls!”.

What I failed to mention—mostly because I didn’t know—was the rock scramble.

For my non-hiking friends, a rock scramble is Mother Nature’s way of saying, “Congratulations. You’re a mountain goat now.” You don’t walk. You crawl. On your hands. Up giant boulders.

We get to the first scramble about a mile in, and Denise immediately says: “I’m not doing that.” I didn’t blame her because it looked about straight up, but I said:

“if we turn around, we’ll miss the falls! They’re supposed to be the best waterfall in New Hampshire!”

After enough grumbling to register on the Richter scale, she climbs it. It’s steep. It’s hard. It’s terrifying. But we make it.

There’s a beautiful waterfall and we wrap our arms around each other and enjoy it feeling so smug that we conquered the mountain, I literally look behind me and see the yellow dot indicating the trail…. On the side of a fucking cliff.

Another rock scramble: twice as high. Twice as steep. Twice as evil.

Denise stares at it - then i get the death stare (which coming from an Italian woman… Was scarier than the mountain).

Hesitantly I pointed out the problem.

“If we don’t go up this one… we have to go BACK DOWN the first one.” again for my non-hiking friends, down is much worse than up.

Denise says, completely deadpan:

“Well… apparently I live here now. bring me pizza.

It was so steep that when Midnight tried getting up the first rock I had to catch her because she fell backwards. it was bad.

After a few words I’m not allowed to print - we conquered scramble number two.

So yes… Denise survived (and I think she got her mountain goat merit badge lol)

I’m still not convinced she’s forgiven me thoRead more