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October 2024
  • Jessica Ekman
OMG, y’all – guess who’s heading to Gothenburg for the ultimate vacay? 🙋‍♀️ That’s right, I’m off to Jay-Z’s Hotel and Resort 🎤💎 – because why not live the high life? #LivingMyBestLife
I’ll be indulging in ALL the spa treatments 🧖‍♀️ with my ex Read more
  • Jessica Ekman

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  • Jessica EkmanTravelerGöteborg

    Hässleholm

    October 18, 2024 in Sweden ⋅ ☁️ 11 °C

    OMG, y’all – guess who’s heading to Gothenburg for the ultimate vacay? 🙋‍♀️ That’s right, I’m off to Jay-Z’s Hotel and Resort 🎤💎 – because why not live the high life? #LivingMyBestLife

    I’ll be indulging in ALL the spa treatments 🧖‍♀️, eating my weight in gourmet food 🍣🍷, and just basking in the luxury that only Gothenburg can deliver. And wait for it... I’m going with my ex 😬. Yes, you read that right. We’re *attempting* to be decent human beings this weekend. Pray for me! 🙏😂 #AdultingIsHard

    Fingers crossed we can keep it cool and just have fun 🤞...or maybe he’ll try to drown me in the pool? 😳🌊 Who knows?! Either way, I’m ready for the drama, the relaxation, and everything in between! 💅 #SpaAndShade #WishMeLuck #ExesAndOhNos    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanTravelerGöteborg

    Göteborg

    Oct 18–19, 2024 in Sweden ⋅ ☁️ 13 °C

    So I finally made it to Gothenburg and HOLY MOTHER OF TRAINS, it was actually on time! 😱😱 That’s rarely happens 😂 While chugging along at a nice, sloooow pace, it started to rain. In Gothenburg. Because of course it did. 🌧️🙄

    WELCOME TO GOTHENBURG, BABY! 😎🇸🇪

    Anyway, we’re grabbing lunch somewhere, then checking into the hotel for a spa day! 🧖‍♀️🧖‍♂️ So ready to soak, chill, and maybe forget that the weather is trying to ruin our lives. 😅

    And also getting vacation from my roadtrip vacation 🤣😅

    #TrainMiracle #SwedishRainIsReal #SpaAndChill #GothenburgVibes    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanTravelerGöteborg

    JayZ Hotell och resort

    Oct 18–19, 2024 in Sweden ⋅ ☁️ 12 °C

    So, picture this: my *biggest love* in life (who also happens to be my **EX**, of course, because why would life be simple?!), and I decide to go on a “let’s-figure-things-out” getaway. 💕 We head to *THE* Jay-Z Hotel and Resort (yes, I know, we’re bougie like that). The ads promised pool parties, cannonballs, and drinks by the pool. 🌊🍹 So naturally, we’re excited—rushing up to our room, barely holding back the urge to change into our poolside outfits and get our party on. #VibeCheck #CoupleGoals #Maybe

    BUT THEN… 💥 WHAM! DISAPPOINTMENT hits us harder than a Beyoncé track drop. 🎤🔥 It’s like we stepped into a *freaking funeral* at the spa! Not a single cannonball in sight, not a drop of party energy to be found—just hushed whispers, quiet massages, and a room full of people who look like they’re waiting for the will to be read. 🖤🕯️ #DeadVibes #SendHelp

    So there we are, sipping our cocktails in absolute silence, whispering to each other like we’re gossiping at a library, wondering if the party is hiding somewhere behind a secret bookcase or something. Spoiler alert: it wasn’t. 🙄 BUT, let me tell you, the burrata salad? Life-changing. 🧀✨ Honestly, the highlight of the entire stay. Who knew soft cheese could heal heartbreak and disappointment at the same time? #BurrataTherapy #SaladGoals

    Overall, Jay-Z’s hotel was kinda... overrated. 👎 The service? Meh. But shoutout to the girl at reception—an absolute gem. 💎 She was like a ray of sunshine in a sea of funeral energy. 🌞 Super happy, welcoming, and basically the Beyoncé of that place. So, yeah, it wasn’t all bad.😅 #SpaFail #ExAndI #StillFiguringItOut    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanTravelerGöteborg

    Restaurang Noy

    October 18, 2024 in Sweden ⋅ ☁️ 13 °C

    So, picture this: me and my beloved ex are strolling around Gothenburg, searching for one thing and one thing only... 🦞LOBSTER. That's right, my ex had a **craving from the depths of hell** for some fancy lobster. I mean, come on, it's Gothenburg, right? Seafood central! 🌊🎣 How hard could it be to find a restaurant serving lobster?? 🤷‍♀️

    Well, GUESS WHAT? Turns out, the ENTIRE city of Gothenburg must have gone through some bizarre lobster extinction event. Because after what felt like a million hours (okay, maybe 2), we're still walking, walking, walking... 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♂️ *No lobster anywhere.* Not one. Not even a claw. 🦞❌

    We could’ve climbed Everest faster than finding this imaginary lobster restaurant. #LobsterQuest #GothenburgOrDesert?? #SeafoodFail

    Finally, after giving up on the seafood dreams, we stumble upon this cute little place called Nuy. 🌟💁‍♀️ At this point, I’m just praying they serve something that won’t make me walk another mile. The service? A-MAZ-ING. The food? Pretty darn good, tbh. 🍽️ Was it lobster? Absolutely not. But miraculously, my ex seemed *satisfied*. 🤯🙄

    Moral of the story: When in Gothenburg, forget lobster and settle for anything that’s not a deep-sea creature. 🦞✌️#Lobsterless #StillGoodTho #NeverAgain    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanTravelerGöteborg

    Park Lane

    October 18, 2024 in Sweden ⋅ ☁️ 12 °C

    So me and the ex (yup, that one 🙄) decided to hit up Gothenburg for a super chill weekend trip... except, surprise surprise, we end up at Park Lane, and BAM 💥 it's like we accidentally crashed the Drag Queen Royal Gala 👑💄. Seriously, these queens had their own VIP throne zone, looking down on us mere mortals like, "bow down, peasants" 😂. I swear, people were practically kissing their feet, and I was like, "Um, do I curtsy now, or...?" #RoyaltyVibes #NotWorthy

    But let’s talk music—3 dance floors?! 🎶💃 We were literally out there dancing like we were back in our 20s again (except with way more back pain and zero regrets 💀). And honestly, in between the glitter, the wigs, and the fierce struts, I kinda felt the love spark up again... or was that just the tequila? 🥂 Who knows! Either way, still kinda love you, just saying. #DancingQueens #GothenburgVibes #AwkwardExFeels    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanTravelerGöteborg

    Marin Maritime

    October 19, 2024 in Sweden ⋅ ☁️ 15 °C

    Picture this: me and my ex, who I swore I’d never go anywhere with again, decided to stroll to the Marin Museum, because why not? 🎉 Oh, and did I mention I was basically crawling there with the sorest muscles from hell? Yup. Every step was like climbing Mount Everest... if Mount Everest were made of STEEP stairs and endless torture. 🧗‍♂️ Every. Single. Step. My body was screaming "OUCH" like I was a 90-year-old grandpa who forgot to stretch since 1992. 😩

    Now, as if that wasn’t enough, we started exploring this ancient ship—where everything is so small and narrow, it's like it was built for hobbits or very brave toddlers. And of course, in typical us fashion, we made the most of it, telling each other creepy ship stories to spook the hell out of each other. 🛳️👻 Nothing says "bonding" like terrifying your ex with haunted sailor tales while clutching the railings for dear life.

    Nightmares of working on ships? ✅ Claustrophobia in tiny hallways? ✅ But hey, we had a great time. #SoreMusclesClub #GrandpaEnergy #ShipsAreTinyAndScary #NeverAgain    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanTravelerGöteborg

    Fiskekrogen

    October 19, 2024 in Sweden ⋅ ⛅ 15 °C

    So, me and my ex went to this beautiful restaurant in Gothenburg and OMG 😍—as soon as we walked in, we were greeted with soooo much warmth and hospitality! It was like they knew we were trying to have the most epic lunch date ever 🤣💁‍♀️. Thank you to the staff for making us feel super special and seen 🥰.

    Okay, so let’s talk food! 🍽️ Seafood buffet, and it was EVERYTHING! I’m talking fresh shrimp, mussels, and fish that practically melted in your mouth. And then... my ex had to ruin it by ordering oysters! 😱 Blääää, so gross! 🤢 But like, I gotta admit, they *did* look kinda pretty... all fancy and whatnot. Oysters = Aphrodisiac? Umm, jury’s still out on that one 👀. Let’s just say, I’ll keep you posted on whether or not the sparks fly later, HAHAHA 😜.

    #LunchGoals #ExAndI #GothenburgEats #SeafoodLove #OystersAreGrossButPretty #AphrodisiacOrNah    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanTravelerGöteborg

    Clarion Hotell Post

    Oct 19–20, 2024 in Sweden ⋅ ☁️ 15 °C

    So, my ex and I accidentally ended up in Gothenburg for one more day. Because why not, right? 😏 And of course, he booked the fanciest place in town—Clarion Hotel. Honestly, the service was good. Oh, and that bed? AMAZING. Can I just steal it and take it home? Please?! 😂 #BringTheBedHome #BedGoals

    Breakfast? Don’t even get me started. There were so many options, I felt like I was at a buffet in heaven. 🥐🍳🍓 And the best part? Checkout at 12. So plenty of time to enjoy my last morning of luxury. #LateCheckoutForTheWin #BreakfastDreams    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanTravelerGöteborg

    Unity jazz

    October 19, 2024 in Sweden ⋅ ☁️ 12 °C

    So there we were, casually strolling through the city, when my famished ex suddenly transformed into a restaurant-sniffing bloodhound. Every corner we turned: "How about here?" "Nope!" "Here?" "Definitely not!" 🥴 #HangryVibes

    Then, we stumbled upon this random jazz bar. My ex is practically drooling at this point, so we just dive in. The food? A solid 6/10, and that’s me being nice. But let’s talk about the real kicker: THE MUSIC. 🎷 Imagine trying to enjoy your mediocre meal while a trumpet attacks your eardrums like a sonic missile. 🎺💥 I do like jazz, but this was like stress jazz, as if Miles Davis himself was trying to see how fast he could make us leave.

    We were practically shouting across the table like we were in a construction zone. 🗣️💨 Forget small talk—this turned into an Olympic-speed eating contest. 🏅🍽 Fastest one wins and gets to leave the chaos.

    By the end of it, I’m swallowing food whole, channeling my inner snake, just to survive. 🐍 "Chewing? Nah, no time for that." Half-chewed food? Check. Questionable digestion? Double check. #JazzTrauma #ChewYourFoodPeople

    But hey, we made it out alive, and continued our epic quest, stomachs slightly confused but spirits intact. 💪😂 #NeverAgain #StrollOfSurvival    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanTravelerGöteborg

    Down Under

    October 19, 2024 in Sweden ⋅ ☁️ 12 °C

    So picture this: after surviving dinner at that chaotic, anxiety-inducing jazz restaurant 🎷😵‍💫—you know, the kind where the music is louder than your own thoughts—we finally made it back to the street for a chill post-dinner stroll. But OH WAIT, my ex’s digestive system decided to throw its own drum solo 🎶🥁💩. Yep, nature was calling in a way that could NOT be ignored.

    Cue the emergency hunt for a bathroom while I’m out here trying to pretend like everything’s normal, casually ordering drinks 🍸😬. We stumble into this random underground bar—it’s like the place you go when nowhere else in the universe makes sense. A bit weird, a little sketchy, but at least it wasn’t as stressful as Jazz-Pocalypse 2024. 🙌

    Best part? My ex finally got to achieve full “zen-poop” 🧘‍♂️💩 in the bar’s hidden bathroom sanctuary. #WhatAManGottaDo #ZenPoopJourney #JazzGutSurvival #UndergroundBathroomAdventures    Read more

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