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  • Day324

    Mountains and valleys

    April 24, 2017 in Germany ⋅ 🌙 9 °C

    A few days into being able to actually fully unwind after the stress of moving out I feel more alive than I have done in ages. My highly-treasured couple of exotic weeks that working 9-5 has afforded me over the years have been amazing but it really was a case of work-stress melding straight into "holiday stress", so I don't think I've had this true sense of "down time" for years.....!

    When you have so few days holiday to offset the year's drudgery of being sat in an office many people feel compelled to achieve the highest state of escapism possible during their permitted 23 or so days of vacation. For me, this was always the pursuit of a guaranteed warm temperature, a stimulating adventure, culture and something very far removed from my monotonous day-to-day. This is sometimes in itself a recipe for not being able to relax as you rush to hand over your workload in a comprehensive way, only to rush to the airport and due to the company-imposed limits of only 2 weeks holiday being allowed at any one time, you rush town to town to maximise the therapeutic or hedonistic return on the outlay you've spent on expensive long haul flights.

    How to fill a quiet day on the bike project number 1- I need to find a way of working for myself or for fewer hours!

    All in all the last few days in Germany have been an absolute joy.

    -Running a half marathon distance for fun through trails and forests alongside water tumbling down the River Elster.

    -Cooking healthy food from scratch and sitting down to enjoy it without the pressure of needing to use my freetime to rebalance myself after the confines of a day in an office.

    -Feeling creative and full of ideas, from a mind that is healthy and not under "stress". Being able to have the mental power to solve problems and feeling resiliant to obstacles.

    With this level of invigoration, I feel absolutley no regret about leaving my last job. Its especially clear to me now, that for the last few years I had sold out to an environment and culture that absolutely didn't meet any of my needs as a human, aside from earning money. I was merely trapped in my own fear to conform to and asire to certain societal expectations befitting someone my age. Whilst I'm now in a bit of a fortunate utopia of a longer than average break from work, I know this isn't a sustainable state of life any longer than the period I've currently allowed myself...it would of course lose its shine if this time were to be an open-ended period of nothingness. I'm going to savour the renewed energy and life lessons that will come my way.
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