Paradise Lost

Not every day was bliss on our travels. On this particular day, Andrew promised that if we left paradise hideaway, he’d take me to paradise Clareview beach! Hmmmmm! With great anticipation we made our way to this ‘ paradise ‘ beach. It’s no exaggeration to say the camping area was crowded over with caravans so thick I couldn’t see the sea!!!!!
“Oh not quite how I remember it “ said Andrew.
“ Never mind. I’ll take you to this beautiful outback town with a majestic pub”.
I’m a little nervous at this stage but when you are with someone who moves as fast as Andrew, you quickly learn to go with the flow.
PLEASE check out the photo marked majestic outback hotel! No further explanation needed. That may have been the end of this story. But, it wasn’t !
Andrew decided that a $ 5 swag camp out back was our best option, given the late afternoon and the great stretch of nothingness ahead.
Apart from the ‘ majestic’ pub, all looked ok. Nice grassy patch. Toilets and hot showers!
About 10 PM the first freight train roared by giving the pub a loud couple of train whistle blowing sounds! Hmmm. Railway line about 10 feet from camp! That’s ok. Shouldn’t be anymore!
About 10:30 PM the waft began. I don’t mean the sweet scent of frangipani! I mean the smell of sewer. Stinking, fetid, fusty, malodorous, musty, noisome, putrid, and rank. This smell permeated the entire camp area making one nauseous and bilious. Doonas quickly over noses. It might disappear. It did not. It got worse! It persisted all through the damp dewy night.
At around midnight the second freight train came rumbling through giving another almighty train whistle blowing! As if that was not enough a THIRD freight train came through around 4 AM. Andrew insists that there really was a majestic hotel in the town. I don’t think so. If anyone has ever had the misfortune of visiting Marlborough, you will know exactly what I mean.
Anyway, Andrew got his just desserts. On a midnight run to the toilet that fateful night, he tripped over a barbed wire fence (as is his custom) and received a nasty gash to the knee.
Needless to say we were away early next day and no more promises of paradise or anything majestic!

But,wait until you see the beautiful Criterion Hotel we stayed at in Rocky! Truly majestic.Read more