The Bodhi Tree

I was feeling a bit uneasy this morning. I was in my head, not fully present, not sure what to do today—feeling pressure to make the most of the precious little time I have here. Fighting with technology and my devices, feeling guilty for not writing and posting more pictures. All the doubts and my typical life anxieties were creeping back in.

No. Not here. Not now. Everything has been so great.

I had to get out. I needed to relax and take it easy, but I didn’t want to sit around the hotel all day. I could just go hang out at a café downtown, write a bit, and go through some pictures. I asked my technology god for café suggestions, which it gave, but it also suggested I check out Wat Damnak Grounds.

What’s that?

“A peaceful Buddhist temple with shaded spots to sit and write.”

Oh, cool. Not great for plopping down with a laptop, but I’d stop there first, then hit a nearby café.

I started walking downtown—about a 20-minute walk—but halfway there, I realized it was just too hot, and the noise in my head was too much. I wasn’t enjoying the walk. I wasn’t paying attention to anything around me like I have been since arriving here.

Fuck it. Tuk-tuk.

My driver was awesome. When we got to Wat Damnak, he knew all about it and explained the place to me. Wat Damnak Grounds is a historic Buddhist temple complex. Once a royal palace, it is now a monastery, community center, and place of worship. It has traditional Khmer stupas, a library, and even a crematorium.

I wandered around. It was huge. Lots of cool stuff, but I wanted to find an appropriate place to sit, meditate, and pray for a bit. I pulled out my phone and checked with my digital oracle again.

Bodhi tree!

I’m in Cambodia. There are Bodhi trees here!

“Many temples have a sacred Bodhi tree,” it told me. Holy shit! There might be a Bodhi tree here.

Bodhi trees are sacred in Buddhism. The Buddha meditated beneath a Bodhi tree with unwavering focus, overcoming distractions and temptations, until he reached enlightenment.

Bodhi. That’s what my former girlfriend called me. It was my pet name. She once got me a bracelet made of Bodhi seeds as a gift. It was touching.

Is there a Bodhi tree here at Wat Damnak? What do they look like?

I checked my phone. That’s right, heart-shaped leaves.

I looked up from my phone and started looking around.

Wat Damnak does have a Bodhi tree. One. And I was already standing beneath it.

Of course I was.

It had been quiet as I walked around the grounds, and suddenly there was a loud roar. It was the Bodhi tree. Cicadas. Loud. The inside of my head, externalized.

I found a place to sit. I sat for a long while with the roar of the cicadas. I closed my eyes. I talked for a bit. And then, I just listened.

Eventually, the cicadas stopped, and it was quiet again.

And so was my head.

And now I know what it’s like to sit under the Bodhi tree.

Well, at least for an hour.Read more