Helmet, I don't need no stinkin' helmet!

A slight diversion if you'll permit...

It's fun to get informed on cultural, frivolous things sometimes. My topic heading about not needing a stinkin' helmet is, as most native English speakers from North America of, shall we say, a certain vintage know, a take on a pretty famous cultural quote that can be and is applied to so many situations - the source of many variations about stinkin’ things we don’t need.

Interestingly, it's both a famous quote and a misquote. If you know it, it's probably from Mel Brooks's 1974 satirical Western comedy Blazing Saddles. The line was delivered as "Badges? We don't need no stinking badges." https://youtu.be/e1lyNt5km8U?si=FHf-1lvwutIr1K68

However, on film, it originally comes from The Treasure of the Sierra Madre , a 1948 American Neo-Western film, and this is where the misquote part comes in. There the line is, "Badges? We ain't got no badges. We don't need no badges. I don't have to show you any stinkin' badges!"
https://youtu.be/VqomZQMZQCQ?si=KXX28Ry8yMt_61cf

Finally, and this might be my favourite part, the original version of the line appeared in B. Traven's novel The Treasure of the Sierra Madre (1927) and included some classic Mexican Spanish swearing, "Badges, to god-damned hell with badges! We have no badges. In fact, we don't need badges. I don't have to show you any stinking badges, you god-damned cabrón and chinga tu madre!"

Ok, on with the story. As I previously wrote, there are many opportunities to do interesting side or day trips from Popayán. The first of two that I did was to a super small town with perhaps the coolest name ever, Coconuco, about 40 minutes away. I don't think it would be unfair to say that the only reason one would venture out to Coconuco is for the hot springs or aguas termales in Spanish. I visited two.

I got myself to the Popayán bus terminal, found the appropriate booth for the bus company going to Coconuco, and purchased a bus ticket for only 8,500, less than $3 CAD. Check out the cool paint job on the bus!

I had booked a room at Hospedaje oficial Doña Ruth through Booking.com, but that didn't work out. When I arrived, the owner was nowhere to be found. Luckily, there was a woman outside the hospedaje, and she also seemed to be looking for the owner or someone working there. She made a few calls and found out that the owner was out of town. Apparently, he didn't get the message from Booking.com. Fortunately, I only had to walk about 10 metres down the road and found another very affordable hospedaje.

The first of the two termales, Aguas Hirviendo, wasn't too far, about 4 km away, so I walked, all uphill on the way there. I had two compañeros the whole way, two friendly dogs who might have wanted me for protection as things got a bit hairy a couple of times along the route with many, many dogs, a couple who were pretty nasty and agressive. We walked together from town to the hot springs, and they would occasionally run into the bush or a field to chase some chickens or run around some cows or the occasional horse. The cows and horses seemed a little nonplussed but not overly concerned. There was also a waterfall, river, pretty flowers and lots of birds along the route. It was a lovely walk, except for the nasty dogs.

I paid my 20,000 entry fee, went to change into my swimming underwear 🙄 and then spent the next couple of hours moving between the four pools they had, 2 large, two small. There was only one other person there, and with it being nestled in the mountains far from anything, it was very peaceful.

While the dogs did follow me around for a while at the hot springs, they eventually disappeared, and I walked back down alone, ignoring the occasional dogs barking and posturing.

The second hot springs I wanted to visit was Salinas ("Then somewhere near Salinas lord, I let her slip away
Lookin' for the home, I hope she'll find
And I'd trade all my tomorrows for a single yesterday
Holdin' Bobby's body next to mine" The Janis version, of course! https://youtu.be/5Cg-j0X09Ag?si=xpg_6kxLi5D_p_QE ). No dogs to accompany me this time because these termales were a bit too far, and I needed a ride. I went up the street where the motorcycle "taxis" were. 15,000 pesos each way...ok let's go. The driver puts his helmet on, and I wait for him to give one to me, but he never does. I've seen the route to the springs, and I've read a few comments so I know it's a winding, mountainous road pretty much the whole way and the last 4 km or so are unpaved. I ponder this situation for a few seconds, weighing all the factors, the possibilities, my life, will my travel insurance cover an injury from a possible spill? how much experience does he have on these roads, etc. Do I demand a helmet? Do I refuse the ride otherwise? Fuck it I think, I don't need no stinkin' helmet! This will just be another travel story to tell...and so it is.

He rode well as I had suspected and hoped. He knew all the potholes and rocks and curves. I never felt in danger although I did hang on pretty tight. Man, were my fingers cramped when I arrived!

I paid my 25,000 entry fee, went to change into my shorts/bathing suit, which I remembered to bring this time😄, and was given a quick explanation and tour of the place. I was the only customer, but did have two dogs on the premises who took a shine to me and followed me around everywhere. Salinas is by far the nicer of the two; cleaner, better signage, better maintained, prettier. Apparently, it's owned and managed by the Coconucos ethnic community, los Kokonucos, of course. I lounged in the pools, remembered to go under the cold water spout every so often, took pictures of the signage here, as I did at Aguas Hirviendo (Check them out, one thing both places tell you not to do is pretty funny), went to the waterfall and took a dip in the huevos-shrinking cold water, climbed the mountain for the awesome vistas and just had a marvellous, chilled time. I went back to the parking lot about 2.5 hours later, where the motorcycle taxi driver and I had agreed to meet. The ride back was equally uneventful, thankfully. I checked out of the hospedaje and grabbed the next bus back to Popayán. Wheeeeeee!Read more