“Take my horse to the Old Town Rhodes”

Welcome one, welcome all, back to Mount Olympus, may you catch the goats that roam freely through life’s path!

I realise with a heavy heart that this is going to be one of the last times that I write these words; we’re nearing the end, we’re almost at the top of Mount Olympus. And this is the longest blog I’ve ever written, so I have gotten attached to the opening line :(

But anyway!

Wake up was certainly something this morning. I won’t bore you with details, though. In any case, although by rights it should have left me disgruntled, I was as joyous and energetic as ever.

It was ridiculously too early though.

So I got up and dressed and sat on the sofa, and just read on my kindle until I heard movement upstairs, and dad came down and seemed very surprised to see me sitting there.

He then sent me upstairs to lie with mum instead of being on my lonesome, which was chill, mum read the blogs and such.

But then dad came back with breakfast in bed for the two of them, so I helped mum try and upload photos for dad’s blog from yesterday. The wifi wasn’t working very well, so mum very solemnly turned to dad and said, “the internet is poopeh” as Jamie Tartt from Ted Lasso would say it.

We laughed!

I assume dad was reading my blog as well, since he turned to me and said, “it’s not that I’m a fan of Taylor Swift, it’s that I’m a fan of you, and I remember things you say.”

I was very confused as to why he said this before I realised he is probably talking about the Toronto Vancouver TV thing (which tbh even I had forgotten; it was over six months ago).

That’s what they all say, dad. Also, that was actually so nice hihi dad is my biggest fan.

But despite his claims to not be a swiftie, when I said mum was a weird woman, dad softly sang, “there’s nothing like a weirddddd woman” (which is ofc originally mad woman, but dad knows this).

The time came to wake up my sisters, I decided to get retribution for all the times morning people had no respect, so yes, Lily was woken up with a song and dance.

She made her peace with it.

We all got ready to go, and damn did my muscles (pronounced “moo-sclays” for the fun of it- you can thank Tate) hurt from the jet ski, it’s like I did bicep curls or something. Not that I’ve ever done bicep curls, so I would not know, but this is how I imagine it feels

Since we weren’t going to be swimming and we were going to take photos in the Rhodes Photo Booth, we did put extra time into picking clothes and getting ready, much to the parents’ annoyance.

I was also really sad because the top that I had my heart set on wearing, mum’s flowy black off the shoulder one, was just taken out of the wash!

So I hung it up on a chair in the sun and basically desperately hoped it would dry. Because it would go perfectly with my most amazing awesome gorgeous new skirt!

The time came to leave, it was still soggy a little, so I decided to take it with me and change in the car if it dried.

In the car, since we were going to Old Town Rhodes, there was really only one song we could possibly play.

Old Town Road by Lil Nas X of course!

Of course we had to sing it, “Yeahhh, I’m gonna take my horse to the Old Town Rhodes” because we’re just sooo funny and original like that. No one saw this coming.

And I get to name my blog a road pun like dad does! Yayyyy!

After Old Town Road, we let Spotify radio play and pick the music, and it was a random collection of songs that was also decidedly bopping. It went from more Lil Nas X to Starships to Thank U, Next, to Attention to Galway Girl to Umbrella (Lily and I of course then talked about Tom Holland’s lip sync battle, the best one out there) to 24k Magic (Zendaya’s lil sync battle, what a coincidence) to many many more.

It was a very very bopping car ride to be sure.

We made it to the car park, my top was thankfully dry, and then followed Lily who was expertly directing us to the Photo Booth! When we had navigated the hordes of people calling us into their restaurant, we finally made it, and there was no queue!

It was so fun, I love Photo Booths, it’s just more fun than a photo on a phone, even if you have to pay for them and get them printed out. The devil works hard but capitalism works harder.

We hit some cool poses, but the machine was very quick and we hadn’t planned anything and during our sister photo, Lily called out “Queen Pose!”

Not a one of us knew what she meant. Do we wave slowly? Do we pretend to wear a crown? Do we lie dead in a coffin? Haha too soon? Anyway.

Lily put her hands under her chin, made me do the same on top of her, Leg sort of had time to get the memo in those three seconds but Tate was so confused. So was I.

When we left the Photo Booth, the one thought on my mind was, “Will I ever know how that is a Queen Pose?”

I bet you’re thinking the same. Well you may find out later in the blog! (Subtle foreshadowing) (very subtle) (hard to pick up).

After that, we had no real plans except buy souvenirs for friends etc. Mum wanted to buy many evil eye stuff, including one for mine and Lily’s new apartment, even though we secretly and not secretly find them weird.

In one shop, Lily moved to let some woman pass, the woman smiled to thank her and put her hand on Lily’s shoulder.

This started a long lecture (to me, not the woman, for some reason) about non-consensual touching and how it’s a problem. Which I suppose is true.

The highlight of the lecture was, “there are some autistic people who actually can’t stand people touching them- I’m not one of them, I’m just a wanker, but still.”

Ah, good times.

After purchasing souvenirs, we wandered further, and it was fast approaching lunch time, so we wandered out of Old Town Rhodes into, idk, new town Rhodes? Town Rhodes? And looked for some lunch.

We found a corner shop selling pastries, and I just about jumped for joy when I saw a potato pastry, something that I ate one time in Lipsi and haven’t found again. It’s so delicious!

We also found a Sephora, which has been called “really beautiful” so even though we had little interest, Lily and I went in.

Me mainly to spray some tester perfume on, but still.

The Sephora was wildly disappointing in that it looked like every other Sephora.

But there was a vanilla perfume (my favourite perfume ever even though I have never owned one much to my chagrin) so all was well, anddd, as we left I noticed they put the pictures of Aaron Taylor-Johnson and Timothée Chalamet right next to each other, so. If you know you know. Sephora is a jegulus fan confirmed.

Anyway.

We made it to our next destination, a “9d cinema experience”. I was pretty sure it would just be 4d, and they were just calling it 9d to sound cooler, and guess what, I was right.

Dad kept making jokes that you can find on his blog that I won’t write in mine since I am just toooo ladylike. The ladiest. No one is ladier than me.

It was kind of fun though, we got a history of Rhodes (which I did already know but still) and the chairs moved, and there were bubbles and smoke and rain and stuff brushing against your legs.

It was fun!

There was a second part that was more for kids, where it was like you were a horse race with different Roman gods (we’re in Greece so I was a little confused). I found it kinda fun and funny, but apparently it made dad feel queasy, hilariously.

Afterwards, we decided to start moseying back to our car. Mum bought some souvenirs, I fruitlessly dreamed of getting a henna tattoo, and then we stopped to look at a place selling bracelets and bangles and rings etc.

The lady who owned it was Australian, and very good at her job, she made us all try on a bunch of stuff that were kind of cool. She was good fun though, I appreciate her dedication. In the end, Lily got a ring (that she is ridiculously happy about; her dream is to have “Phoebe Buffay hands” apparently and Allegra got a bangle.

Lily kept going on an about her ring, which I found, well, let’s just say it was a bit of a hypocritudity, as they say. If I had bought that ring mayhap two years ago, when it was my style of ring, Lily would have hated it, and told me so.

It just goes to show I am ahead of my time, not weird, as people say all the time.

Then we sat down in a chill place to get drinks, and I said to dad, “I’ll get a sprite or an appletini” like JD got all the time in Scrubs. Dad told me to not get an appletini because I won’t like it, which I took to mean, “get a sprite”. Because that was the other option.

And yet, when I then ordered a sprite, Dad gave me the most disappointed, derisive look that I have ever received. Which was ridiculous.

Lily got a Rainbow.

When the drinks came, though, I was tragically disappointed because it wasn’t a Sprite, it was a 7up. Which are not the same. It said sprite on the menu! Why wouldn’t they just put 7up!

It ruined my entire day. I was miserable. People laughed at me. I am addicted to sprites.

And what was worse, it wasn’t in a can! My collection has not advanced :(

Anyway, I made my peace with it when Lily gave me the parrot that she had with her drink and I could put it in my hair and it just went so well with my skirt that I *had* to keep it.

But I was secretly annoyed still, and so when an argument was struck up between Lily and Mum about f1 and biofuel and trustworthy sources, I jumped to defend Lily because I do love a good argument.

Anyway, we then got up to leave, and on the way home, it seems mum also loves a good argument, because she started a “debate” about “is recycling greenwashing”, which, no, it’s not, but mum thinks it sort of is.

Anyway.

Dad then said I was his favourite because I partook in the debate, unlike my other sisters.

On the drive home, we started the music with “Chunky” by Bruno Mars and then let Spotify radio do the work. It was bopping.

We did make a quick stop at a supermarket, I didn’t go in though, and Lily bought a gross drink that no one liked.

As we finished our drive home, Beyoncé’s “Love on top” started playing, and we all gave it a valiant try. But damn, she can hit those high notes.

We certainly couldn’t!

Upon our arrival at our home, some went into the pool, I preferred to sit inside with mum and read.

At this point, mum cracked open the chocolate biscuits for biscuit time, and we had two each secretly.

Lily then came inside and I watched half of an F1 race with her. Mum was making her famous Greek rice dish, delicious, and playing her bopping tunes.

At the time of dinner, we laughed and joked, I even made Allegra laugh, which is close enough to a Dad laugh. She even said, “not bad Rumple”. Oh yes, not bad.

Although she was also mean to me at some point, because I was very loudly giving my thoughts on a matter. Since her chair was near the pool, I pretended to push her in like mum kept wanting to do, and she absolutely shrieked like a baby.

PTSD from the last time I lost her to a body of water? Who knows!

Biscuit time came around, and Allegra was just scandalized that someone had eaten four chocolate biscuits from the previously unopened pack. She launched an investigation as I struggled to keep a straight face. The best way to avoid suspicion was to join the investigators, so I did.

I watched as Olivia denied it all, so did dad and Lily, before Allegra turned to mum.

Knowing the jig was up, I winced when mum confessed. But then, in her confusion, mum said “me and Lily ate some earlier”.

In horror, Lily jerked upright in her seat, words bubbling to her lips in her defense, but I was just laughing so hard.

It then came out that it was me.

As we ate our biscuits, Lily asked me how I ate mine. I gave a demonstration; Allegra and Olivia followed suit with their way.

Biscuit eating is a very serious affair.

We then asked Lily how she ate hers, and she demonstrated, and it was so funny that I had to film and make her do it again. It was sooo funny. She looks like a chipmunk.

The video can be found in this blog.

Finally, the Photo Booth pictures were passed around, and the three of us younger sisters finally asked the burning question that I’m sure is the only reason you’ve made it this far into the blog.

“How is that a Queen Pose?”

Through laughter and accusations, Lily managed to explain that she meant Queen, the band, and that it had made perfect sense to her at the time. One of their album covers, when they’re sort of one head above the other.

Anyway.

And in the final photo, I had said, “finger guns!” And looking at this photo now, a conversation was sparked about how many fingers are in the finger gun.

I am a firm believer that “finger guns” is when you have only one finger being the gun, and that “guns with your fingers” is two. Because finger guns is not actually pretending to be a gun.

My sisters disagree.

Anyway.

We retreated inside, I began to write the blog and got one of my sisters to send me a screen recording of “woah slow down, Maurice” (the hilarious video I mentioned in yesterday’s blog, it has been added to said blog if you are curious), but then mum said, “who wants to watch 27 dresses?”

This was a romcom that Tate and I had been talking about a day or two ago.

So I put down my phone and watched it with mum and Tate.

Dad was next to us, of course, he tried to pretend that he wasn’t interested, but his phone kept turning off, he laughed, and he was just definitely invested.

Tate and I loved it, the main guy is very good looking and we also laughed at many a moment. I believe that if we just made more romcoms, we would be one step closer to world peace.

Sadly, that absolute classic came to an end (a happy ending ofc), and it was time for bed. I had very little energy for blog writing, so I only made it five paragraphs in before I turned off the phone and went to bed (it was after midnight).

And so this is where we pause our trek up Mount Olympus, folks.
Bye family!!! ✌️Leia mais