Palma day 5

Palma Day 5: Walrus mode, toxic wine & cute men I don’t understand 🍷🐋🔥

Yesterday continued in true vacation style:
We had breakfast like the queens we are,
and then spent the entire day in full WALRUS MODE by the pool.
Zero shame, max floatiness, 100% fabulous.
I basically became part of the sunbed.

Eventually, we peeled ourselves off the loungers and went shopping (read: wandered aimlessly in circles),
followed by lunch at a beach club where I contemplated never returning to real life.
So far, 10/10 day.

Then we got back to the hotel, opened a bottle of red wine and OH. MY. GOD.
That sh*t tasted like rat poison mixed with shoe polish.
Had to pour it out like the dramatic diva I am.
Yes, I know a crime against wine,
but I was NOT about to die in Palma with purple lips and regrets.

Dinner saved my soul.
We met our favorite waiter a sweet older man who doesn’t understand a single word we say,
but he’s so damn cute I want to wrap him in a napkin and smuggle him home.
Zero communication, 100% connection.
Honestly, the love story we never expected.

Then we hit a cool bar, and BOOM another cute-ass waiter appears like a flirty little garnish on our cocktails.
Bless that man and his perfect timing. 🍸

We actually went home early (I know, who are we?),
sunburnt, tipsy, and glowing like lobsters with secrets.

And of course because I’m a woman of discipline and delusion I dragged myself out for my morning walk.

AND GUESS WHO I SAW AGAIN?

Tall, blonde, probably-German, Olympic-sprinter-body, lion-on-the-run GUY.
Second day in a row.
Is it fate? Is it a vacation boyfriend speed test?
IDK, but I am sprinting in slow motion toward this storyline.

Let’s see what today serves.
Manifesting: smooth wine, hot men, and zero sunburn on my baboon booty.

#WalrusEnergy
#WineTastedLikeMurder
#WaiterCrushesWorldwide
#GermanGazelleSpotted
#TipsyWithACrush
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