Thailand day 5

Thailand Day 5: My Spine Filed for Divorce, The Ocean Tried Me & Midnight Food Won 🇹🇭💀🍹

Woke up feeling like a crocked fossil.
My spine had already packed its bags, filed for divorce, and blocked me on all platforms.
I didn’t get out of bed! I escaped it horizontally, crawling like a crime scene survivor.

After the nightmares caused by The Bed (you know that medieval torture device), it was time for breakfast.

Breakfast is now less about food and more about emotional repair.

Then we walked to the city center in search of a smoothie.
Because nothing says “healing” lik
e liquid fruit pretending to fix your life.

Next stop: the harbor.
Why?

Because it was time to take a ferry to Koh Larn
a beautiful island where time doesn’t exist and sunscreen is a lifestyle.

My hubby HERO OF THE DAY!  bribed me with a surprise Piña Colada because he knows I think sunbathing is just lying still while questioning existence.
10/10 emotional manipulation.
Would fall for it again 🍹

We ate DELICIOUS food.
Angels sang.
Stomachs were pleased.
No complaints filed.

Then it was time to go back to Pattaya via speedboat.
Fast.
Fun.
Sexy.
Until it stopped.
In the middle.
Of the ocean.
Just STOPPED!
I stared into the horizon like:
“So this is where my story becomes a documentary.”
But the driver fixed it.
No swimming required.

THANK GOD because my spine is currently on strike 🤣

Back in the city center for a bit, then Bolt back to the hotel for a “quick power nap.”
Quick = 3 HOURS.

We woke up in the middle of the night.
Hungry.
Confused.
Regretful.
Because instead of dinner WE SLEPT

So we tried to order food delivery.
And listen I was emotionally prepared for disappointment.
BUT IT WORKED.
IT WAS DELICIOUS.
AND
MOST IMPORTANTLY
✨ NO FOOD POISONING
A historic win.

Day 5 recap:
✨ Spine divorced me
✨ Smoothies for survival
✨ Island vibes unlocked
✨ Surprise Piña Colada saved a relationship
✨ Boat stopped mid-ocean (character development)
✨ Accidental coma nap
✨ Midnight food delivery victory

At this point, survival is the vibe. 😌
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