Cảm ơn Vietnam, hello New Delhi.

What a whirlwind getting into New Delhi. The flight was easy enough. However, the times and delays made for a big evening and conjusive foundation for bugs becoming so over tired. My poor love. In the hustle of everything, bugs got a fever and became really hot to touch. Burning. On the plane, I had to strip buggs down, so he was just in your nappy.

I was worried about bugs and felt so upset at the thought of something happening to him. I tried to remain calm and centred to be there for him as much as possible. I look at tyde and he is looking at me for reassurance. I try and cover you so that there is less going on around you, but it makes you even more hot and clamy. The plane is stuffy and hot, and im surprised the aircon wasn't working well. I wasn't the only one who thought so, and a lovely Indian guy offered buggy his electric fan, which we used until it was flat.

We finally get there and go through the process of customs and arrival. The process at Delhi Airport was rather quick and prompt. It was the bags that took forever.
We went outside waiting to pick us up with a sign that had our names on it. Thank goodness! It's weird that we found the sign, but the guy wasn't there. I started to get frustrated, I was so conscious of buggs and how tyde was feeling that I just wanted to get us to the hotel so you could shower and cool down.
The guy eventually shows up and directs us to a taxi service not far from the terminal. Little beaten up hatch back that look like they have seen some harsh delhi roads. We get in, I reasure tyde that everything is OK. I just want to get there.
The driver is nice enough. Broken English but English non the less. Refreshing after Vietnam, where there is minimal. This guy starts taking us down the wrong streets through back alleyways. I had to ask him what was going on and where he was going! My heart was skipping some beats at this stage. Flashes of the worst case scenario penetrative my mind. I'm trying to stay calm and focused. I pull it up on my maps and say we are going here. He uses my phone to get to the hotel.

We get there, and I thank him. Only for me to have gotten the name of the hotel wrong! I should have stayed there in hindsight. The guy called the owner of our hotel and he came to get us. The hotel 5 minute walk around the corner which we had to do in the middle of the night. Horrible feeling, and i was scared a little.

When we arrive, my heart sinks. They were nothing like the photos displayed on the internet. We show up to a beaten run-down building. I tried to remain optimistic, hoping the rooms would be better than the outside and reception, but no. We come into the room, and as we enter a cloud of misquitos, fly in different directions as if woken from a peaceful slumber on the bed. I check that the windows are closed, and the guy shows us a few things and leaves. I lock the door and start analysing the room. I put you down to have a stretch, but you're over it at this point. Don't blame you. it's nearly 1am, and I feel bad and rippled with mum guilt that we are even here.

My heart breaks as I look around the room. Walls covered in stains, sheets dirty and stained laid with little black hairs. The bathroom is shabby, and the shower that I promised you isn't going to happen as there is no shower, only a bucket and tap. Don't think I would even risk the shower anyway even if there was one, It's got bacteria written all over it. We remain smelly and dirty because I'm not risking that water touching you at all. I'm just conscious of your temperature.

This fever. I pull out my first aid kit and measure 3mls of paracetamol for you. You take it down in a couple of gulps, and I work on getting you ready for bed. Fresh nappy clothes. We sleep on top of everything so we aren't close to the mattress and on the sheets. I have the fan blowing hard core on us to try and deter any of the mosquitoes from landing on us, and I keep my pants on as a blanket and protection.

I settle Tyde down. I turn off the lights. It's only for one night. It's only for one night. I keep telling us this. No skimping out in India. At all. But who really knows, i thought i was genuinely booking somewhere good. I can't trust photos anymore. It's so disheartening, and I care so much about it because I want tyde to be safe.

Tyde slowly fall asleep. It took him a little bit to shake off the edge of not being able to sleep. Every time he tried to sleep on the plane and through customs and in the taxi, were woken up again, and there is nothing worse. He did drift off while I lay awake paranoid with a case of insomnia. Hyper vigilant and alert. Time moves past, I don't know how fast. I was lost in it. Then, all of a sudden, tyde started scretching and crying. As if in sheer pain! I try and console him but he still shreaks and cries. It's about 2am. I pick tyde up, try and give tyde some water which you refuse, try give tyde some boob didn't want that either. I'm becoming fanatic watching you in such pain and discomfort. Then, all of a sudden, you power chuck an incredible amount of vomit everywhere. All over me. All over the bed.
Stunned at the amount of it, I comfort you looking in disbelief at the weird coloured vomit everywhere. Must have eaten something or caught something that was passing through tyde. Finally he starts to settle, and it was so relieving tyde was starting to feel a bit better after his projectile vomit.

My darling boy. I've never seen anything like it. Slowly but surely, I re settle tyde back down, cuddling you, and asleep, you fall in my arms.
Thank goodness that day is over.Read more