Vũ Lâm

I went to Ninh Binh back to the mainland of Vietnam. On the bus the guys seat in front of me was broken. He turned to me asking if I can fix it? Mate, do I look like someone who can fix this? Do I have a screwdriver on me? Do my soft hands and (relatively) clean fingernails suggest I am a Handyman to you? 

This admittingly small anoyance turned out to be only one of a few interactions with complete ass-wipes. Let me begin with the biggest one:

I went to the Mua Cave which is less a cave then a viewpoint. The view is amazing but it was really crowded. On top of the viewpoint there is this dragon statue. There was literally a line to climb up to the statue. It reminded me of mount everest and the tourists who line up for the summit. Since I have no will of my own (and Julia and Simon left me) I lined up too and went up this ridiculously dangerous climb. At the dragons head there was this guy who looked exactly like price charming from Shrek. He held on to the head and had a selfie stick in his other hand. Behind him there was this asian dude, apparently blocking his picture. Prince Charming asked him if he could move bc he is blocking his picture. The guy didn't understand or hear him. So our dear mister self-important started speaking in french, then Russian, then polish, then german, then dutch. Purely to show off. The guy didn't react. Some other dude asked Mr. Assface what he was doing and he went "ohh I'm just doing this 360° Picture and this guy is too stupid to understand he is blocking the view". Of all the languages he supposedly spoke, cuntish was his native. 

Later on the climb (again I can't stress enough how insecure it was) there was this rebellious kid who decided to sprint through the slippery mountains. At one point he slipped and barely held himself on a chain which was the only thing to hold on too. Some dutch guys saw this and said "of course the french boy". France-bashing seems to be a thing here. Later I saw the french boy sprinting down those equally slippery stairs. Don't you have a mother boy? (Btw Hi Mom! The climb wasn't actually all that dangerous, I'm over dramatizing for the attention). 

Speaking of slippery stairs, I saw this polish couple who looked like some edgy teens who hated capitalism but loved Starbucks. The girl had sandals on and complained about how slippers the stairs were. "Who makes stairs like that?" She asked. I later saw them in my bus to Phong Nha. The guy had Pyjama pants on. He looked like John Morrison. Meaning dead.

Also at the bus stop there was this British girl. She complained why she had to wait in the office of the bus company and couldn't go to the station (the station was like 200m away). I guess she had a point somewhat but I suppose they do it for organisational purposes so the people don't mix with the other bus companies or something. Now she didn't think this far and decided to argue with the poor patient lady at the office. She insisted on going to be bus stop because she said she will miss her bus. The lady said repeatedly that she WILL NOT miss her bus she will be picked up, the bus driver will wait for everyone. She didn't accept that but eventually stayed and wasted everybodys time. At least gave me content for this blog I guess.

In my Hostel there was this American guy in his 40s. I talked to him at breakfast. He had this aura of arrogance around him. He spoke about how the Vietnamese people try to scam you everywhere and how he can't see anymore Buddhist temples and mountain tops because he saw so much already. He bragged about not being on Social Media and therefore not needing these pictures at the tourist spots. At some point I decided to not speak and let him speak to himself.

Alright enough negativity. Ninh Binh also had lovely people. Like the Hostel owner who had this stern look on his face all the time but I later learned he had this Mr. Miyagi Aura about him and took the effort to learn my name. Or Graham, the Australian whom I shared a boat with. He shared a lot of his wisdom travelling the world without being smug or condescending about it. 

I rented a bike and saw some amazing places while driving around aimlessly. Probably didn't see as much as I could have but I needed a break from more douchebags. I started to feel a sense of what things attract me and what don't. That concerns what people I want to be around but also what things I'd like to see and experience. Ninh Binhs douchebags brought me closer to that. Now maybe that's a good sign but also it estranges me from a lot of people. I just noticed how different everyone is. While waiting for the bus to go further south to Phong Nha the driver was calling out the names. "Dominik, one person" he yelled. It made me feel like a person. It made me feel lonely.Baca lagi