Manila Mayhem

From Boracay, we travelled back to Manila for three nights. Getting back to Manila was the same ordeal: mini van to the jetty, boat to Caticlan Island and then another mini van to the airport. But getting into the airport itself was just as much of an ordeal. I reckon we were asked for our boarding passes and passports a thousand times. To get into the airport doors, security required everyone to show their credentials. Then again at check-in, security screening, boarding and on the plane. By the time we boarded, I was starting to wonder whether they’d ask for them again once we were airborne.

The next ordeal was going to be whether we were within the airline baggage limits. I’d managed to free up some space. Yes, I had lost some things, nothing of significance. Of course something was left behind when we checked out of the hotel. It wouldn’t be a Ricky and Jason adventure without it. Jason is keeping score: apparently Ricky 3, Jason 0. But that doesn’t seem right; have we crossed into a parallel world where everything is in reverse?😂

With some of our excess items concealed in our jumpers wrapped around our waists, we passed the Amazing Race challenge and got through check-in without needing to pay for extra baggage. We then made our way through customs and found a spot in the waiting area. The seating was rows and rows of metal benches that had enough space for a small child to fit. Perhaps they were getting us acclimatised to the cramped seating on Air Asia.

Boarding was meant to commence at 11:15, but they seemed in a hurry and called our zone an hour and a quarter before take-off. We were loaded onto buses, where we sat for about half an hour before being taken along the tarmac to another part of the airport. Jason surmised that they were making room in the departure lounge for other passengers. We were unloaded and herded onto the aircraft like cattle heading for market. Before we knew it, the pilot was instructing the cabin crew to arm doors and cross-check. We took off half an hour early. That’s unheard of.

We arrived, collected our bags and were still 45 minutes ahead of schedule. We got a Grab taxi to our Airbnb in the centre of Malate. We were dropped off at La Vie Resort and Casino, which looked like a fancy hotel. I didn’t think we were in the right location, but we put our bags through hotel security and started to head to the lobby. It wasn’t the correct location, we weren’t staying in a hotel. So we exited and found our Airbnb next door. It certainly wasn’t winning any glamor award.

After checking in at the lobby, we jumped into the lift. The lift kind of shook as we ascended. It didn’t exactly give me much confidence that we’d make it to the 32nd floor. Instead it felt like we might plummet into the basement. In its heyday, the building would have looked as glamorous as its neighbour, but building maintenance was obviously not a priority for the body corporate.

Our apartment had a great view of Manila city, including all of the pollution. Manila’s metro area has a population of about 25 million. Much of the skyline is dotted with skyscrapers and shopping malls. The Robinson’s Mall was a few blocks down the road and this became our go-to place for food. We had no room to do any shopping.

On our second day, we visited the Spanish colonial area, where a walled city, called Intramuros, housed the citadel and Fort Santiago. The complex is positioned at the mouth of the Pasig River and served as a military headquarters, a prison, and provided defence for the city for many centuries. It is also the place where the Filipino national hero, José Rizal, was imprisoned and executed in 1896 for causing a rebellion against the Spanish colonisers. Many Filipinos consider this the beginning of their nation, after 333 years of Spanish occupation.

Near the fort is San Agustin Church, a UNESCO-listed church, which is the oldest stone church in the Philippines. Across the road is the Casa Manila, which hosts a museum that displays what it was like for the wealthy during the Spanish period.

After the walled city and fort, we wandered around the old town, taking in the colonial Spanish architecture and old cobblestone streets. After walking around a few blocks, we stumbled upon a group of young Filipinos, who asked to have a photo with us. They thought we were so tall they needed photographic evidence 😂.

We started heading in the direction of our Airbnb, which was a couple of kilometres away. I thought we may as well walk home and get our step count up. Jason wasn’t too impressed, but went along with the plan. On the way, we checked out the Plaza Moriones, a public square, and took a pit stop to take some photos of the José Rizal monument.

The walk home worked up an appetite, so we headed to our regular joint, the Robinson’s mall, for lunch. We found it hard to find food that didn’t contain high levels of sugar. The bread that we bought from the supermarket was labelled as sugar free, but it contained a sweetener. Even the air you breathe is sweet. Possibly to cover up the smog. It seems that when the Americans kicked out the Spanish, they left behind not only jeepneys but also diabetes.

After World War II, the Americans left army vehicles, which the Filipinos converted into local buses - Jeepneys. To this day, they have continued with the same design, and they remain a common form of transport for locals to get around Manila.

In the evening, we walked down the street to Navy Army Burgers and Burritos, a military inspired Filipino restaurant chain, serving American and Mexican food. Earlier in the day, we had walked past and heard a kitten crying. A homeless person had tethered it with a rope to a metal hook in the concrete. When we walked passed at dinnertime, the homeless person was asleep. Over dinner we devised an elaborate rescue plan that would have impressed MacGyver. Unfortunately, we lacked a Swiss Army knife or any useful tools. So all we could do was untie the rope from the hook. A few metres down the road, outside the restaurant, the homeless person’s friend whistled out to us. Jason yelled back “don’t be so fucking cruel!”. I hope the kitty was able to get away and live a better life.

Afterwards we wandered around the streets, observing the locals going about their business. We came across Little Korea Town, where there was a place filled with children and their families playing games. We continued on for a bit and then dragged our weary feet back to our apartment.

Our final day was spent exploring the largest mall in the Philippines and the sixth largest mall in the World, SM Mall of Asia in Pasay City. We took a Grab to the mall, and along the way struck up a conversation with our driver. I started the trip with a few Tagalog phrases, which impressed our driver. He proceeded to teach us more words. He provided some suggestions on where to go in the Philippines; that is until he found out how old we were. He thought we were a lot younger, so suggested one of the party islands. He asked us if we took medication to look so young 😂 We’ll take the compliment.

After exploring the mall for a few hours, we had to try halo-halo (mix-mix), the unofficial national dessert of the Philippines. It’s made of layered sweet ingredients (of course!), finely shaved ice, and evaporated milk. I was determined not to indulge too much on this Amazing Race, but as soon as I saw the Tres Leches halo-halo I folded quicker than an old camp chair. Diet stats tomorrow.

The final night was spent packing and repacking to make sure we could get to our next stop.

Next stop clue: A city where dragons guarded the throne and twenty-four emperors called home. For centuries, ordinary people were forbidden from entering.

Filipino Phrases

Walang anuman! (wah-LAHNG ah-NOO-mahn) - You're welcome!

Ingat! (EE-ngat) - Take care!

Magandang araw sa iyo! (mah-GAHN-dahng AH-rahw sah EE-yoh) – Have a good day!Read more