Noen Hom

16:00
The public transport options up to Khao Yai National Park are limited. There’s a train that runs to Pak Chong, to the North of the park, but we’re staying South, and getting across the park will prove tricky. We decide to jump in a cab, as the Grab app reckons it’s only going to be 1,100 Baht. This seems very cheap to me, but - ok. Our driver arrives, and immediately starts to negotiate an increase. Part of me wants to tell him to fuck off, but the greater part of me recognises that the price quoted by Grab (an Uber type company) is incredibly low compared to the around town cab prices we’ve been paying during our stay in Thailand. Khao Yai is fully 2 hours / 100 miles away, and the price he’s asking for seems reasonable. I checked with a couple of local cab companies yesterday, and they all wanted upwards of 4,000 Baht for the same journey. Our negotiation is fairly stilted, as our driver speaks very little English, and that’s twice as much Thai as I have. Google Translate saves us though, and soon enough we’re en route.

The drive out is hair-raising. I’ve not done a long (ish) drive in a small vehicle yet. Our minivan experience to Pai and back is the closest to it. It’s ‘interesting’ to be able to see what the driver dude is up to here. He’s obviously keeping an eye on where we’re going, but mainly he’s watching a Thai TV soap opera. He’s definitely in the ‘confidently aggressive’ category of cab driver. We’re happy enough in the back, chatting away, and trying to ignore the occasional sharp braking…

The drive up takes fully 2 hours. We very nearly head in the wrong direction at one point, but I catch it in time. We realise (via the means of Google Translate etc etc) that there is another very similarly named hotel about 10km in the opposite direction. Close one, that. Arriving to Siam Dasada, we realise:

a) we’ve snagged an absolute steal, and
b) we may be the only guests at the lodge

We’re paying around £35 per room, per night, and the accommodation is palatial. Properly deluxe. We pop to the lodge restaurant to grab a light lunch, as neither of us has eaten today. Felix orders ‘shrimp filled doughnuts’ which turn out to be nothing of the sort, but which are delicious, breaded Thai fishcakes. I have a very decent prawn Phad Thai. I ask for a glass of wine, and am brought the bottle, and a wine glass. I ask for a glass of wine. The wine glasss is taken away, and a champagne glass brought in its place. It takes a little while, but ultimately it transpires that they don’t sell wine by the glass. To be fair, with this level of occupancy, they’d risk a lot of wine wastage, and nobody needs that kind of negativity in their life. I dive into the wine, which is a decent Chilean Chardonnay. Felix is heading out for a bike ride around the lodge, and I’m gonna read for a bit. I’m half hoping there might be a snooze lurking…

22:30
There WAS a snooze lurking. I have maybe 1.5 hours of afternoon delight. We head out at 19:30 in search of a bar a short walkaway called Bamboo Bar. It is closed. Several hundred metres down the road is Tipsy Bar. We decide to go and at least take a look. Success! It’s open. There’s a duo setting up on the live music stage, there’s an orange statue of the Incredible Hulk in the garden, and they have wine. We settle in.

We have some food - a mountain of seafood fried rice for Felix, along with some fried squid eggs, and a seafood omelette with crispy pork rice for me. Both v tasty. Vicki and I tried squid eggs back in April, and did NOT enjoy them. These are a marked improvement. I think the ones we had were simply boiled. These are sliced, breaded and deep fried. If you didn’t tell me otherwise, I’d think they were pieces of calamari. Once again, I ask for a glass of wine. Once again, this proves problematic. I’ve still got 1/2 bottle of my lunchtime Chardonnay in my room, and it looks like it’s gonna be joined by half a bottle of red wine in a couple of hours. I comment to Felix that I feel al little like we’re at the only eatin house in the Bayou. There’s a closeness in air, a deafening chorus of cicadas, and real sense that we’re a million miles from the nearest population centre.

We finish eating, as:

a) the band strikes up, and
b) a huge rainstorm kicks off

The rainstorm does drown out the sound of the music, and this is no terrible thing. The rain intensifies, until it’s as heavy as any rain I’ve ever seen. The wind direction changes slightly, so that a light drizzle is being blown into the tin roof under which we’re sitting. It’s not unpleasant. It’s probably the coolest I’ve felt since we arrived. The rain continues, unabated. If it’s even possible, it gets heavier. Then the lightning starts. It’s a good few miles away from us initially, and manifests as thick sheets of lightning across the clouded sky. It gradually gets closer to us though, until vivid forks crack very close by to us. Most everyone else that was sitting outside has moved indoors to stay dry. Not us though - this is way too much fun to watch. Whilst gazing into the eye of the storm, we realise just how batshit crazy the garden ornaments are. Obviously, we’ve got our friend orange Hulk. There’s a Spiderman hanging from the ceiling as well. A variety of Harley-Davidson signs around the place, a red UK style telephone box, and a cartoon mouse. Obviously.

After an hour, the rain starts to lighten. We consider making a run for it. We’re probably a 10-12 minute walk from our room. Neither of us has an issue getting soaked, but equally - neither of us particularly wants to get struck by lightning. We wait for perhaps another 30 minutes, The lightning strikes feel a little less intense, and little less frequent. We call for the bill.

Now - we’re slightly running out of cash. I brought about 20,000 Baht in cash with me, and Felix took out 10,000 when we arrived. We’ve both significantly underspent against our budget over the past week, so haven’t needed to re-up with cash just yet. We’re in Thailand for 2 more days, and have been hoping not to have to visit an ATM before we make it to the Cambodia border. The Bamboo bar that we’d hoped to go to earlier accepts credit cards. The Tipsy Bar, where we’re currently being presented with a bill, does not. It’s fine - we might just be a bit tight for cash when we jump on the train on Saturday to head for Poi Pet… We’ve both got some US Dollars to get us started once we get into Cambodia.

We make our move. Felix strips off his t-shirt. I do not. The rain - which in the UK would constitute heavy rain, but over here is nowt but a light shower, is quite pleasant. As we march down the road, a bolt of lightning cleaves the sky. We’re surrounded by the growling call of bullfrogs. It’s pretty other worldly. We see a few more vivid lightning strikes on the walk back, and we’re both ducking instinctively, as though this is somehow going to improve our chances of not being struck by it. I reason that I’m walking next to a 25 foot tall lightning conductor, so should be ok. Back at the lodge, huge puddles have appeared where there were none when we left. I’m wet through, but not as wet to the bone as was possible. We’re going to try and get some VPN/screen cast action going to watch the England vs Denmark game. Wish us luck….Read more