Day 35 - Homeward Bound...

08:56
My body has no idea what time it is. Nor, for that matter, does my brain. The cab down to Mumbai took a shade over 6 hours, with a couple of pit-stops along the way for fuel and toileting. Sham’s driving is eccentric at best. His car’s limited to 80kph, which is great on the highway, but at several points, he deviates from the highway, and still drives at 80kph. I suspect he’s trying to make a bit of cash on the side by avoiding the tolled parts of the expressway, and these are supposed to be included in my cab fare. At one point, not long after we leave Aurangabad, I ask why we’ve left the freeway, and he just replies, “Only 40km.” Righto.

The traffic as we arrive into Mumbai is frantic. The sun is just beginning to light the sky, I remember being driven through this part of Mumbai on my first arrival into India, and being slightly taken aback at the ramshackle and chaotic nature of it. Now, I just take it in my stride. The streets are filthy. It looks like there was a huge street event yesterday, so littered are the pavements with rubbish and plastic.

I’ve not flown from Mumbai International in fully 15 years, and I believe it’s had quite the glow up since then. It certainly feels a lot more spacious and clean than my last visit. I’m quickly checked in, and into the security queue. Now, I’m fully ready for my last vape to be confiscated at this point. I’ve ordered two more to be waiting for me at home, and I’ve got other nicotine options for the journey. I follow Debbie’s advice, which is to put ALL electronics into a single bag, so it can readily be removed and scanned. I slip my vape battery in there, having popped the pod part in with my liquids. Colour me surprised when it doesn't get pulled. I wonder if having ALL of those electronics in a single place made it more difficult to identity the rogue vape battery, or whether as this is for an international flight, they just don’t care. I certainly don’t care - I’m just pleased my vape has made it through in one piece. Nicotine alternatives are great if the only option, but having my vape with me will make the c. 10 hour flight into London a much more pleasant experience.

Emerging from the immigration checkpoint into the departure lounge, it’s clear just how much of a glow up the terminal has had. It’s now bright, open, spacious, well laid out. I’m not particularly hungry, having had a couple of samosas a few hours ago at one of our taxi pit-stops. There is, however, a Hoegaarden bar, and I find myself drawn to it. It’s before 9am, and I’m really not feeling too clever, but I also feel like I should toast the end of what’s been an amazing trip full of ups and downs, and some lifelong memories. I order a large Witbier, and nearly have a heart attack when the bar dude asks for 2180 rupees. WHAT THE FUCK? This, ladies and gentlemen, is the £20 pint. I saw another bar further down the terminal that has Kingfisher on draft. Might need one of those to calm me down after the incredible expense of my Witbier…

12:33
Back on UK time. Not long after take off, my eyes start to feel heavy. I’m starting to feel hungry, so I hang on until the food service, then fall into a deep sleep. I’m out for around 3.5 hours, which is something of a result. I stick to water and soft drinks. My beer(s) earlier didn’t do me the world of good. Hardly a surprise, but they greased the pre-flight skids. My head’s already banging, and doesn’t need anything else to make it worse. I managed to find a pharmacy in the airport, so have some decongestants to go with my painkillers. Not 100% sure they’re doing much, but probs better than not having them at all…

14:30
Flight’s nearly done. It’s felt long. As a result, I expect of not feeling great and not sleeping as much as I’d have liked. It does give me time to watch a few movies:

1) Conclave - 7 pointy hats out of 10. Thoroughly enjoyed. Ralph Fiennes is excellent, as is Stanley Tucci. As someone raised Catholic, I knew a fair bit about the conclave process, but the Machiavellian scheming behind it was good entertainment. Interesting ‘twist’ at the end…
2) Saturday Night - 8 giant penises out of 10. Thought this was excellent. Many of the folks on whose comedy and comedic acting I was weaned as a kid. Have been an avid watcher of Saturday Night Live most of my life, so to see what is apparently a pretty accurate rendition of its genesis was cool.
3) Juror # 2 - 7 biased jurors out of 12. Perfect plane fodder. Utterly inoffensive, moderately entertaining, vaguely interesting premise, largely predictable plot.

The young woman in the seat next to me is a marvel. She’s slept for the very vast majority of the flight. Sadly, when asleep, she’s alarmingly flatulent. Thankfully not heavy stinkers, but she’s quite the trumpet.

20:30
Ended up waiting very nearly two hours for my bag at Heathrow T3. Cheers for that luggage handling dudes. As a result, I miss the 16:20 coach, and am only just in time for the 17:20.

As I get closer to the Brighton, I think the adrenaline that’s held me together for the past 24 hours is starting to disappear, as I’m feeling rougher and rougher.

I stumble through the door, dump my bags, and collapse onto the sofa. Within seconds, I’m covered in cat. It’s good to be home…Læs mere