They're a Weird Mob

This title was the title of a book from the mid-seventies, written by new immigrants from Europe trying to grapple with Australian customs and idioms. In the same vein, here is my (Andrea's) take on Hokkaido. Because our cultures are so different. Where we might be slap dash, they are OCD. We can be crude, even coarse; they are the most carefully polite people I know. They are embedded in ancient traditions and customs, whereas we, from a multicultural society, take on new ideas readily.

These are just some of the things we find weird.

Waiting at traffic lights for several minutes until they turn green even though there is no traffic at all in sight up any of the long straight roads. Hokkaido doesn't have any traffic sensing system so you learn to just chill and be obedient. Even Laurie. Sometimes.

Obeying road safety directions from men with flags or red wands who generally outnumber the workers. These men take their job very seriously, either standing completely immobile like the guards at Buckingham Palace, or waving their wands dramatically but incomprehensibly. I believe there has been a huge increase in work-related stress claims since our ride started, as Laurie chooses to interpret the waving as meaning go ahead (whereas I think they are actually saying 'oh shit we don't know what to do about cyclists. Wait till we find the rule book').

Interpreting signs in English. Very little English is spoken, but sometimes road signs are in English .My favourite: "Be Safe - Running Lamps". I giggled imagining a horde of lamps running up the road ahead, before realising it probably meant turn your headlights on. Then there was the official national park brochure with heaps of info on 'Waking in the Forest'. Intrigued, and thinking it was a Dark Mofo-esque public art work, I was most disappointed to realise that with an added 'L' it could mean something much more mundane.

Over-engineering. Everything is bigger and more complex than it need be. At a Marshlands Observatory I asked what the 10m high structures were lower down the hill (see photo ). The answer? No-one knows. Anyone who did know has now left and no remaining staff have any idea.

Talking of complexity, the Japanese written language has over 50,000 characters of which 2156 are commonly used. (Thanks Wikipedia). To pass grade 6, you need to learn 1026. But several people have told us that this means the average teenager cannot read a detailed newspaper article let alone a complex novel. No wonder Manga are so popular. And no wonder problem solving skills seem limited when so much of your brain-growing years are devoted to rote learning.

Beauty. Japanese culture has an exquisite sense of aesthetics - think of it's tea ceremonies, paintings, silk kimonos, films and so much more. But it doesn't apply to the built environment which is strictly utilitarian in this part of the world. Think concrete, then more concrete with no sign of town planning, and a consistent colour of grey. With some exceptions (see photo). Oh yes, and electricity infrastructure trying desperately to get into every photo we take.

But then who are we to judge with our increasingly horrendous suburban deserts and half forgotten country towns.

Anyway these are some things that make us laugh or cry. But of course there is so much more, and we love it.

I can't finish without mentioning the constant soundscape of the Japanese Bush Warbler. A tiny scrap of a bird, rarely seen, it has appointed itself as the bicycle monitor of the forests. It's piercing, bell-like call accompanies us on every puffing and sweating metre as we scale the mountains, and every glorious kilometre as we freewheel down. Tour de France riders don't get half as good a cheer-squad as we do here in Hokkaido!!Read more