Day 1 - Never in Doubt

Fed up with the miserable English weather and having self diagnosed as suffering from Seasonal Affective Disorder, Jackie and I decided to head to South-East Asia for Christmas and New Year. After much research, the only country in that region was Thailand who was opening up it’s borders to foreign tourists from 4th November 2021.

Apart from drawing up a broad itinerary for our 56 day trip, I can take no credit for all the planning & form filling that had to be done to make the trip possible. Jackie booked the flights, applied for Thai visas to allow us to stay over 30 days, then applied for a Thai Pass to prove we were double vaccinated and sufficiently insured. She also had to book a Covid PCR test to be taken not more 72 hours before we flew, a Thai Covid PCR test for when we landed and an approved Thai hotel for our first 24 hours in Thailand whilst we awaited the result the Thai Covid test results.

If this wasn’t stressful enough for Jackie, I added to it by announcing that I had three gig nights in a row on the weekend before we were due to fly, which was potentially the worst thing I could do to enhance my chances of catching Covid. A positive PCR test would have meant cancelling our entire trip, but there was no way I was missing a 40th anniversary New Model Army bonanza of 60 songs over 2 nights. (The other gig was Nine Below Zero).

Two days before our flight we duly had our PCR test & if we thought there was any chance of cheating the system, we were sadly mistaken. We had to show our passports as proof of identity & the staff actually performed the test on us through the car window. We were told we would be emailed the result at or before 10pm the following day.

At 10pm the following evening we still hadn’t heard a thing. We went to bed an hour later with Jackie fretting like a good’un. I fell asleep, however my email confirming a negative result arrived at 0005 hours. Jackie, by now nauseous & hyperventilating, was apparently up emailing the testing company until after 1.30am, when they finally sent confirmation she was also negative. Hurrah!!

At 3.30am the alarm went off & after a taxi & coach ride we were all checked in & in the airside bar at Heathrow Airport just five hours later. Heathrow T2 was virtually empty and absolutely no queues anywhere. A very pleasant experience.

Our Thai Air flight TG919 on a Boeing 777 was only half full and the only thing I want to say about it was that the inflight service was very minimal - a small meal at either end of the 11 and a half hour flight with just one drinks service of wine or beer.

It was around 6.40am local when we landed at Phuket International Airport and we discovered that we were the only flight in. Only half of the passengers on our flight were disembarking, the remainder were flying on to Bangkok. This made for a speedy dash through Arrivals, producing our reams of paperwork to the Health Authority, Immigration, Customs & then the Testing Centre, where staff in full Hazchem outfits performed another PCR test on us. Less than 40 minutes later, with all the formalities completed we headed to the exit with our rucksacks and were herded into a taxi to take us to our Phuket Airport Hotel just 600 metres from airport to await this latest PCR test result. Easy!!

We spoke too soon. The taxi driver dropped us off at the Phuket Airport Place, but he was insistent it was the correct place. He then drove off without payment. We were gutted because it was a shithole, but luckily for us the receptionist confirmed we were in the wrong place & very kindly summoned the taxi driver back to take us to the very nice Phuket Airport Hotel. We still didn’t pay the taxi driver.

The exceptionally helpful receptionist at our hotel, sorted us out with downloading the Thai equivalent of the NHS Covid app to our phones, explained how we would be informed of the PCR test result, then sent us to our room with a large bottle of Chang each.

We slept until 3.30pm and discovered that shortly after 11.00am we had been emailed confirmation that we were negative & good to go to enjoy our trip. The final hoop had been jumped through.

We celebrated by getting up for a cold beer with a late lunch. Our hotel didn’t serve food other than breakfast, but our exceptionally helpful receptionist ordered us a takeaway of chicken, basil & egg fried rice which he recommended. It arrived about 10 minutes later by moped and our two portions cost us a total of just £3. It was very nice AND very hot.

We were still tired so went back to bed for a couple of hours before popping out in the evening for dinner. Our chosen restaurant, just around the corner, did not have an English menu and after several attempts we managed to order a Pad Thai & a chicken & cashew nuts with rice. This together with a banana & chocolate pancake for pudding and all washed down with 4 beers came to the princely sum of £10.

The evening was finished on our balcony with a Hong Thong & Coke, whilst tentatively identifying our accommodation for Christmas Day.

Song of the Day : So Sad About Us by The Jam.Read more