2024 Travels

maio 2024 - janeiro 2025
  • Jason and Ricky 's Gaycation
Travels in 2024: Eurovision, Denmark, Swenden, Iceland, the Netherlands, Germany, Thailand. Leia mais
  • Jason and Ricky 's Gaycation

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  • Here we come Copenhagen via Singapore

    5 de maio de 2024, Austrália ⋅ ☀️ 25 °C

    The countdown to our Eurovision adventure had begun. The countdown to our flight had also begun, as we continued to jam more and more crap into our suitcases. Jason wasn’t convinced that suitcases would be better than our backpacks, especially along the cobblestone footpaths of Copenhagen. “We’ll be right” was my mantra. We finished packing with a few minutes to spare before we called an Uber.

    Before we even left the Valley, the new series of the Lost World kicked off. I looked down to find my new jacket that was purchased especially for the Icelandic weather was no longer wrapped around my waist. The few kilos l lost in anticipation of the holiday must have made the difference. Jason’s response was: “do you really need it?”. How else is this Queenslander going to survive the arctic temperatures, albeit spring arctic temperatures!

    So, I made the Uber driver circle back, and as I ran towards our apartment block, there was my jacket hanging on the letterbox. A woman poked her head out from her luxury 4WD – because you need a 4WD in the concrete jungle of Brisbane – and with her freshly plumped lips said that the jacket was laying on the driveway. With said jacket back in my possession, our Eurovision adventure was back on track.

    We checked into our 2:45pm Singapore Airline flight with plenty of time to spare. There was hardly a person to be seen; no line ups at security. You could take your pick of body scanners to go though.

    It wasn’t long before we took off and made our descent into the big blue sky. And then we started to experience some turbulence. As one of the flighties was walking down the aisle, the plane hit a bump and she tripped on my leg which sent her flying down the aisle with her tray still in hand. I just saw this Singaporean woman looking back at me as she flew through the cabin. I have no idea where the contents of her tray ended up.

    We landed in Singapore and had three hours to kill. After aimlessly walking around Changi Airport, we headed to security to board the next leg to Copenhagen. It seems one of us gets pulled up at security every time. This time the body scanner went off like I’d hit the jackpot. Apparently some foreign object was stuck to my right arse-cheek. Security asked whether I wanted to go to a room; at first I said “no”, but then started to think how intrusive was this search going to be and was he going to at least buy me dinner first. Turns out there was nothing there – except my arse-cheek 😂. A free grope for me.

    It was at this point that the Lost World series was axed and replaced with the Destructive World series. Jason’s brute strength split the zippers on the cheap Chinese-made Eurovision backpack. The zip disintegrated upon impact, leaving the contents sprawled out along the floor. Shania Twain wasn’t impressed much. And neither was Jason!

    Jason went about shoving the contents back into his bag, one item and several expletives at a time. I was instructed to be the body guard, as if I was Kevin Costner and he was Whitney Houston. My job was to ensure that there was no lost cargo as we boarded our midnight flight to Copenhagen. One of the flight attendants felt pity for Jason and gave him some Singapore Airline duty-free bags to put his stuff in – now he looked like a slightly upmarket bag lady.

    We paid extra for more leg room but Jason wasn’t impressed. Neither is Shania unless she’s in first class. He reports that people kept him awake all night, bumping into him. I can’t complain, I slept most of the 14-hour journey.
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  • Here we are Copenhagen

    5 de maio de 2024, Dinamarca ⋅ ☀️ 13 °C

    The flight was an hour delayed getting into Copenhagen, which was fine with us because we had hours to kill before we could check-in to our Airbnb in the trendy area of Vesterbro. As we waited for the train to take us to downtown Copenhagen, I was approached by three different people asking for directions, as if I was a local. The first guy came up to me and asked whether the train was going to Copenhagen Central. He struck up a conversation and I found out that he was from Azerbaijan but studying in Romania and on holidays in Denmark and Norway. He was surprised to hear that we were from Australia and not Danish residents. Ricky’s information centre also assisted a Vietnamese guy and an older couple find their destination. It was lucky they were all headed in our direction otherwise Ricky’s information centre would have been no use.

    With eight hours to kill, we wandered around the city centre as we watched the Copenhagen marathon. We didn’t have the energy to join them. We did have the energy to eat our way around town, landing at La Neta, a Mexican restaurant, after a quick bite to eat and a loo break at Burger King – and to use their free WiFi, of course.

    Later in the day, we continued our explorations and ended up at Freetown Christiana, which was once the hippy epicentre of Copenhagen. Things have drastically changed since last year. The area has been cleaned up and construction work has commenced. There was certainly more of a touristy feel now. Apparently the government decided to “clean” up the area after someone was shot dead during a gang feud.

    We finally checked into our one-bedroom apartment in Vesterbro, which was a long way from the chiming bells of city hall where we stayed last time. I couldn't bear the sound of bells every 15 minutes until midnight. Thankfully we avoided getting tinnitus this time.

    Jason Snoopy McSnoop made himself at home immediately, snooping through drawers and cupboards. It was as if we was ransacking the joint. But I don’t think that he’ll get our host's frilly knickers over his calf muscles.

    Eurovision activities commenced almost immediately with the turquoise carpet parade, but due to security concerns this was restricted to the press. We were left to watch the parade on a live YouTube stream from our lounge room in Copenhagen.
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  • Copenhagen - Day 2

    6 de maio de 2024, Dinamarca ⋅ ☁️ 13 °C

    The next day, we did a dry-run to Malmö to see some of the contestants on the rooftop of Emporia, the main shopping centre. We ended up seeing the Swedish contestants, Marcus and Martinus, who are actually Norwegian pop stars representing Sweden. We also saw Saba, the contestant for Denmark.

    After lunch, we headed back to Hyllie (pronounced heal-lee-a) station to travel to Copenhagen. Outside of the train station, we were approached by a reporter from RTL, a Croatian TV station. She asked if she could interview us about Eurovision. Cameras rolled and she asked us our names and where we were from. People always seem surprised when they hear we are from Australia. She started by asking if we felt safe in Malmö, considering the heightened concerns about security and the numerous protests that were registered during Eurovision. We had to admit that it felt weird seeing so many armed police and tanks in the area. But we felt safe nonetheless.
    The conversation then diverted to Croatia’s chances of winning the competition and a request for us to sing “Rim Tim Tagi Dim” by Baby Lasagna. I told the reporter that I wouldn’t embarrass myself by singing, instead we embarrassed ourselves by doing the dance 😂. It seemed to please the Croatian reporter and we went on our merry way. Some Croatian farmer is going to be shaking their head, thinking what are those crazy Australians doing on my TV bouncing up and down to a Croatian pop song.
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  • Copenhagen - Day 3

    7 de maio de 2024, Dinamarca ⋅ ☀️ 14 °C

    The following day was Semi-final 1. Before we headed to Sweden, we decided to treat ourselves to a slightly more upmarket lunch. I ordered our lunch: 2 hamburgers with bacon and cheese, no meal deal, and one caramel shake (to cut down on calories and cost). As I walked back to our table, I did the conversion: AU$65. I almost needed to use the defibrillator to kick start my heart and get me off the ground.

    After lunch, we returned to our Airbnb and started to get ready for the first semi-final. Just as we were about to leave, Jason had a wardrobe malfunction to attend to. With that sorted, we were on our way. Sweden has a law that no bags are allowed into major events, which meant we needed to be very strategic with what we brought to the show. We were told that we should bring our passports because police would be checking. But that seemed to only apply to those that didn’t look like locals, and apparently we blended right in.

    With another refuelling at Max Burgers, we were set to tackle the long queues at Malmö arena. Australia was in the first semi-final, which was jammed packed with audience favourites. Australia was never going to get out of this bloodbath alive.

    After the first semi-final show, we took the train two stops to Malmö Central to party at Euroclub. Not only do they have a no-bag policy, but also a no-jackets policy in the club. In a cold climate such as Sweden, this policy puzzled us. Even though we were inside, it was still cold. Jason wasn’t parting without his jacket. He convinced one of the organisers to allow us in, on the provision that we didn’t take our jackets off.

    Inside the club, security guards, dressed similar to the police, wandered through the crowd, being oogled by a room full of queers. Jason thought they were police, and even thought they were carrying machine guns. They were only keystone cops with a baton. Such a drama queen!

    When we looked up the return train back to Copenhagen, it seemed the last train was 1:35am (later we found out that Google lied). As we headed to Malmö Central, we stumbled upon the Irish contestant, Bambi Thug. Jason went all fangirl on them and gave them a hug.
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  • Copenhagen - Day 4

    8 de maio de 2024, Dinamarca ⋅ ⛅ 16 °C

    The next day was a day of rest. We had to remind ourselves that this was a marathon not a sprint. Instead, we spent a leisurely day walking around Copenhagen and ended up at Nyhavn, a Seventeenth century waterfront canal and entertainment district.

    On Thursday, it was Semi-final 2, and this time we decided to leave a little earlier than previously, just in case there were protests blocking the bridge between Copenhagen and Malmö. The day before people were late for the dress rehearsal show because “unauthorised persons” were on the bridge.

    The show seemed to go ahead with little drama. After the show, we continued the party at Euroclub. This was becoming our regular thing.
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  • Copenhagen - Days 5-8

    9 de maio de 2024, Dinamarca ⋅ ☁️ 17 °C

    By Friday, the Eurovision dramas were starting to unfold. The Netherlands was disqualified due to what the EBU deemed unacceptable behaviour from Joost Klein, another crowd favourite, towards a member of the production crew. There also seemed to be some drama associated with some comments that he made during a press conference. The final was shaping up to be one of the most controversial contests for a long time.

    The day of the final arrived and we had gotten into our routine of food, alcohol and getting ready. We made our way to Copenhagen Central and took a seat next to two guys on their way to the viewing party at the Euroclub. We struck up a conversation with them, with Jason spouting off about how he didn’t like Copenhagen when we were here last time, before he realised he was speaking with a local and quickly tried to recover the conversation with how much he like it staying in the outer suburbs of Copenhagen. Jason didn’t dig himself out of his hole by saying that Vesterbro was the suburbs – it’s downtown Copenhagen!

    When we got to Malmö, we did our usual routine: refuel, pee and stand in line to enter the arena. This time, there were more pro-Palestine protestors than previously. One woman was dragged by Swedish police into a paddy wagon, screaming that they were hurting her arm.

    Next minute, there was a camera in my face asking me who I thought would win Eurovision. I have no idea what random TV station or online blog was asking. Another interview that’s somewhere on the world wide web.

    We then ran into a group of Danish boys that helped us get out of the maze that is Copenhagen Central after the first semi-final. At our first meeting, I had the Australian Aboriginal flag painted on my cheek in support of Electric Fields, who was representing Australia. One of the Danish guys mistook the colours as the German flag and started speaking in German. I had to break it to him that I didn’t understand a word. He then broke into English and shared his strong mix of gin and soda.

    For the final, I wasn’t entering the arena without an alcoholic beverage to enjoy during the show. So I lined up at the bar and waited my turn. A Swedish woman came up to me and asked me where I was from; again she was amazed that we had flown 24 hours to come to Eurovision. I thought that I was all set to enjoy the show until I tried to leave the bar area and was repelled by the security guard. Apparently I wasn’t allowed to leave the area with a bottle of beer. So I had to scull it and return to Jason emptied handed reeking of beer. Oh well!

    Even before the show started, the organisers had a pep talk to calm the crowd, tensions were high with one disqualified act and another act many wanted removed from the competition. The head of the EBU, Martin Österdahl, wasn’t a popular man. Every time he spoke there were audible boos from the audience. In fact, I never heard a word that he said. But when you watch the play back, the boos have been removed from the broadcast.

    With the Netherlands disqualified, they refused to give their votes live on air, and Martin had to announce the votes “due to a communication problem”. In the rehearsal show, they use dummy votes and one country refused to say Israel and said Ireland instead. The host, Petra Mede, kept repeating for them to announce the correct country until it became clear that wasn’t going to happen. Luckily, no jury gave Israel douze (12) points. The public vote was another story; I still think that the public vote was rigged. And in the live show, many of us turned our backs on the Israeli contestant in support of a cease fire and an end to the genocide in Gaza. This wasn’t met with positivity from all in the arena.

    After the show finished, we headed to Euroclub for the after party. The final show didn’t finish until 1am so we were already keeping our eyes open with matchsticks. We hung about, dancing in the background of the SVT TV crew who were filming at the club. Another TV appearance which we’ll never see. After an hour or so, and with tired feet, we dawdled back to the train station to make our way back to Copenhagen. Luckily, we had another day to recover and to wander the Danish streets.

    Next stop: Reykjavik
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  • Iceland: Land of Fire and Ice

    13 de maio de 2024, Islândia ⋅ ⛅ 8 °C

    With Eurovision now over, it was time to move onto our next destination. We packed up our stuff and headed to the Copenhagen airport to catch a 12:40pm flight to Reykjavik. And in customary fashion, as we went through security, my carry-on bag was quarantined for inspection. “Dansk, English?”, said the security guy. And when it was clear that Danish wasn’t my first (or even second or third) language, he followed up with “You seemed to have forgotten to remove liquids from your bag”. That’s strange, I’m almost 100% sure that I’d removed anything that might cause a problem. The aim had been for a seamless security check. But this really wasn’t to be. He proceeded to take everything out of my bag, providing commentary along the way. “You’ve got a bit of a sweet tooth, hey” as he opened the bag of chocolates and lollies. With everything strewn across the counter, he came to the conclusion that there was nothing untoward. “Best you pack this yourself” was his departing remarks. Thanks for that!

    I went about shoving my stuff back in my bag and then realised I still had another tray of crap to collect. The Lost World instantly hit me in the face. But it wasn’t until I boarded and took my seat that I realised I had lost my special pen for my e-notebook. Add that to the list, along with a few other less significant items.

    We were flying budget airline Play, the national carrier of Iceland, and for some reason their computer system didn’t seat accompanying travellers together. Jason was seated against the window in the row in front of me. A girl approached me and asked if I wanted to swap seats so she could sit with her friend. “Sure, no problem”. So I moved to the back of the plane and took what I thought was her seat. I got all the things I needed for the flight and got comfortable, only to find out it was the wrong seat. Maybe she said 46F. So I moved a couple of rows down. But the musical chairs didn’t end there, the music hadn’t yet stopped. Nope, still wrong seat. After reconfirming the correct seat, I was ready for take off, wedged against the window and a big Icelandic man. Oh well, at least it’s only a three-hour flight.

    We arrived in Reykjavik around two in the afternoon to a barmy four degrees; and that is in late spring. Because we weren’t seated together and I was at the back of the plane, I was one of the last people off the plane, and Jason was waiting for me at the gate. Immediately, I could tell by the look on his face that he didn’t seem impressed. As we flew into Iceland, we got a great view of the country. The volcanic landscape was clearly visible. And there clearly wasn’t a big metropolis with skyscrapers.

    There aren't any rideshare companies in Iceland, and taxis, similar to most countries, are ridiculously expensive or try to rip you off. Luckily, we had planned ahead and had booked the airport bus (which was still not chicken feed).

    The trip from Keflavik airport to Reykjavik city centre was about a fifty-minute bus ride through the wide-open spaces of Iceland. We got dropped off at the BSI transport centre and then transported by a smaller shuttle bus. The only problem was the drop-off point was about 800 metres at the bottom of a steady incline.

    We traversed the hill with luggage and bags in hand and eventually made it to our destination, Reykjavik Apartments4U. It was a self check-in process with a pin code to enter. But where was the keypad to enter the pin code? Turns out that the keypad was electronic and we needed to touch the door but that wasn’t really clear from the instructions.

    One of the first things we did was go to the local supermarket, Konan, to get provisions for the next four days. If we thought the prices of food in Scandinavia was expensive, this was on another level. AU$90 get you a soup and a couple of lamb cutlets, or AU$42 will get you fish and chips.

    Later, I went out to explore Reykjavik and on my return locked myself out of the apartment. Three incorrect pin codes and the door locks itself. Unauthorised access, unauthorised access, unauthorised access!!! Luckily, Jason was rugged up inside and was able to open the door. Otherwise I’m not sure how long I would have survived before frost bite would have set in 😂. For some reason, working out how to get into a building seemed more difficult than it should be!
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  • Reykjavik - Day 2

    14 de maio de 2024, Islândia ⋅ ⛅ 9 °C

    The next day, we set out to explore the city centre. Most of the houses are no more than two storeys because of the frequency of earthquakes. Buildings over two storeys need special approval from the authorities. For a small population – just under 400,000 in the whole country and with two thirds residing in Reykjavik and the surrounding areas – the city is sprawled across a large area, but still it can be easily walked.

    It wasn’t long before the next episode of the Destructive World began. Somehow the ugly giraffe statue sitting on the TV cabinet fell onto the ground, shattering all four legs. It had clearly been broken previously with the remnants of glue still visible. Fortunately, MacGyver (aka Jason McDonald) had come prepared with shoe glue. Fixed. No-one would ever know the difference, unless it falls again. There were also a few cross over episodes with the Lost World but we won’t mention that 😂.
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  • Reykjavik - Day 3

    15 de maio de 2024, Islândia ⋅ ☁️ 9 °C

    On our third day, we did the Golden Circle tour, which included Friðheimar Farm, where we learnt about how they grow tomatoes in Iceland. If people think that Australia has a harsh climate and landscape, Iceland probably matches it. Fire and ice. Light and darkness. It has extremes. I don’t think I ever saw complete darkness while we were there.

    The island is so remote that until humans invaded, there was only one mammal native to the island: the attic fox. The first settlers of Iceland, the Norse and Gaelic peoples, must have been really desperate to flee the Norwegian kingdom to settle in such a harsh climate. Fortunately modern conveniences can ameliorate that; the geothermal gas produced in Iceland can be converted into electricity through a complicated process, but provides a lot of green energy to power all of these inventions to make life a little more comfortable. For locals, this means cheap electricity. It’s this energy that the Friðheimar Farm uses to power the greenhouses to fool the tomatoes into thinking that they aren’t in one of the coldest climates.

    The island is so cold that even most insects don’t want to live there, so pest control is not a major issue. Compared to Australia where there are more than 200,000 species of insects, Iceland has over 1000. One of those is the Icelandic fly. The Friðheimar Farm has introduced flies from the Netherlands to fight off the Icelandic flies, which were bad for the tomatoes.

    Moving on from the farm, we headed to Geysir to witness the exploding geothermal springs, including Strokkur, a fountain-type geyser that shoots hot water and steam, every 6-10 minutes 15-25 metres into the air.

    From there, we headed to the waterfall of Gullfoss. The Hvítá river flows into the waterfall, which plunges into a 32m crevice. And then at the end of the tour, we visited Thingvellir, where the first Icelandic parliament, the Althing, was formed in 930CE. Our tour guide, Stefan, proudly claimed that Iceland has the oldest recorded legislative body. He was also proud of how the Icelanders are so liberal-minded. He gave some examples, such as the first elected female President in the 1980s and that in the up-and-coming election there was a “gay running for office who was married to another gay”.
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  • Reykjavik - Day 4

    16 de maio de 2024, Islândia ⋅ ☁️ 8 °C

    On our final day in Reykjavik, we took the fifty-minute bus to the Blue Lagoons, about five kilometres from Grindavik. Earlier in the year and late in 2023, there were several eruptions from the nearby volcano with lava flowing around the surrounding area, blocking the roads to the Blue Lagoon Fortunately, the path had been cleared by the time that we arrived, but the new lava was clearly visible. Grindavik had been evacuated and it is unlikely that people will return to live in the area.

    The Blue Lagoon, a man-made pool created from the geothermal power plant nearby, is one of the most popular tourist destinations. On the day that we visited, it seemed that half of the US has decided to bathe in the 38° highly concentrated silica water. We overheard a group of American guys (although we suspect there may have been a Canadian that had infiltrated the group) say “Copenhagen is just like an American city”. My first thoughts were “what American city has Eighteenth and Nineteenth century Danish architecture?” It's amusing how the point of reference for Americans is America. Although Jason’s point of reference seems to be Dalby and the Darling Downs 😂.

    After a relaxing day in the geothermal pools, it was time to return home, but not before taking a tour of the Icelandic Punk Museum. The museum is housed in a converted 1920s public toilet, with urinals and toilet bowls still in tact. In the early 2000s, the toilet was closed because it didn't meet modern building standards, such as being wheelchair accessible – it’s located underground with a staircase leading to the entrance. The collection featured plenty of international punk and new wave bands that had played in Iceland in the early eighties and the influence this had on Icelandic punk. It also featured plenty of memorabilia from the Sugarcubes and Björk.

    Afterwards we moseyed our way home to prepare to move onto our last destination in Keflavik, about 40kms from Reykjavik. Our flight from Iceland was at the crack of dawn so we decided that it would be easier to stay near the airport, otherwise we would have had to leave Reykjavik at three in the morning.

    But before we headed to the Reykjanes Peninsular, we had time to fit in one more museum: the phallogical museum. The museum displays artwork and over 100 species of phalli. Dicks, pricks and cocks from wall to wall. They even have a specimen of a human, a 95 year old man from Iceland who donated his wang for all to witness. Not sure if it was shrivelled from age or just the cold 😂.

    With the last cultural study concluded, we had to make our way back to collect our luggage and wait for our transfer to the airport. But not before trying a caramel scroll from Brauð & Co, a famous bakery in Reykjavik. The tasty treat went down well.
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