Alta

It's Saturday night close to midnight and my first iboga ceremony begins. I'm sitting on the right end of the sofa with a blanket on top of me and two mop buckets at my feet. Julie is to my left on the sofa, and Trisha is to my right in the arm chair. Opposite me in the other arm chair is Matt. The room dances with the flickering light of the candles, and the music already has me in a relaxed almost trance-like state.

Matt brings out a horn. It looks like a shofar, a ram's horn, but the hole to blow in is about 6 inches down from the end of the smallest diameter, on the side of the horn. Matt says it's a Water Buffalo horn. He places his lips to the hole and blows but is unable to get his lips placed correctly to sound the horn. He passes the horn to Trisha. She gives it a try, but only fart noises are produced. She passes it back to Matt. This time he sounds the horn and we're ready to begin.

After a brief introduction, he serves me my first dose of medicine. With a spoon, he dumps what feels like about 3 to 4 tablespoons, around 1/4 cup of ground bark in my mouth. There's not much room left for water to wash it down and I feel the bitter root stick to the roof of my mouth. With a hard gulp I'm able to get down some of it which then leaves enough room in my mouth to wash down the rest. In order to gulp, I had to bite down first and some root bark is now wedged into my molars. I've done enough medicine at this point to know that I do not like this bitter stuff in my teeth because the taste lingers. Matt asks Trisha to tell the story of how Iboga was revealed to mankind.

The story goes like this... a village man from the Pygmy tribe of Gabon goes out to the forest to check his traps to see what they might be having for dinner. In one of his traps he finds a porcupine which is a rare delicacy in those parts. He excitedly brings it home for his wife to prepare. He's so excited about the porcupine dinner that the man drinks himself to sleep while his wife is still preparing the meal. He sleeps through dinner, but she eats the porcupine. Soon after dinner, she begins to feel strange and "up pops a big screen in front of her and she begins to see things on this big screen". Wait a minute, Trisha, this is years before Hollywood. I don't think the Pygmy woman knows the concept of a screen of any kind. I brush my thought aside and continue listening. I've read this story before, perhaps I saw it on a YouTube video, but this is the embellished version. The village wife sees things that are happening in the other side of the village and surrounding areas, things that she is not privy to and would have no way to know. The plant spirit comes to her and tells her that they need to take the plant to all the villages and it will be their healer, teacher and guide. The next day, the wife goes to her husband to share her strange experience and the husband takes the matter to the village elder. The village elder sees that whatever happened to the hunter's wife gave her the ability to see things, things that were happening and were coming, and he inquires as to what she ate. The village man and elder head back out to the trap to see what they can find. Next to the trap is a plant that is partially uprooted and the roots appear to have been eaten. The elder takes some of the root back to the village and eats some and he has his own visions and instruction to share iboga.

As I listen to the story, my neck begins to tingle; warm tingling circulation permeates the top of my neck and occipital region. This is where my stress and anxiety manifests itself in my body, and I know Iboga is beginning it's work.

An hour after the first dose, Matt serves me a second dose. This one is about half the previous amount. I have no difficulties getting it down. They continue talking. Julie tells me of her story of what happened to her during her first journey. She and her 4 siblings were adopted from Korea; she was just two at the time of her adoption. She was the second oldest of her siblings and was closest to her father. After some intense family issues, her father committed suicide. She was 9 years old and didn't cry when learning of his death or at the funeral. In her iboga journey, her father came to her. They expressed love, and she cried the tears that did not come as a child.

About two hours after taking the first dose, I began to feel like I wanted to lay down. My body was so relaxed that sitting up became difficult. They helped me lay down on the mat and Trisha tucked me in real good with the sheet and two blankets on top of me. My bucket was placed on my left and my water bottle on my right. Matt brought me a eye mask. As I lay there on the mat, full relaxation flowed through my body, the pain dissipated, and I begin to feel very sleepy. I tell them what is going on and they think that Iboga has chosen to work on a physical level in my body. I begin to see purple sparkling string lights on the ceiling as well as pink flashes of light. Dark moving shadows haunt my peripheral vision, but this only amuses me. I suddenly get very shaky and cold and ask for an additional blanket. That little extra weight of the third blanket did just the trick. Matt paints a two inch diameter circle on my forehead with the orange Pygmy paste. This is to help open my third eye.

I turn occasionally from my back, right, left, stomach... trying to get comfortable. It feels to me that I have slept in a light state, tossing all night on the mat. At times I listen to the music, but instead of getting lost in the monotonous rhythm, I begin analyzing all the various parts of the music. I see instant picture flashes, that dissipate almost as soon as they come. None of them seem to mean anything to me or strike a memory. I remember a vision of students getting on a school bus. The tall girl lingering at the back of the line carries her backpack. She doesn't look like me; it means nothing. Picture gone. I see a spirit face. It's not like the face of a man, but rather a spirit and is dark brown like a wood carving. It's not scary, but the face is stern. Is this Iboga, I wonder. Later, I can find no pictures online that come close to matching what I saw.

I need to use the restroom, so I shift or raise my hand and someone comes immediately to my side. Trisha was the first one to help me to the restroom. As I tried to get up, my legs were so shaky and wobbly that I could not stand. One particular time when I couldn't get up, I said I would just wait longer. Once I was pulled up and stabilized on my feet I was pretty okay shuffling to the bathroom with assistance. Through the night I got up four times, I believe.

The rest of the night plays out similarly. I hear loud voices chanting at the end of the Bwiti songs. They seem out of place for sure. "Bassi, Bassi" which is the men's way of saying Amen. I hear a female voice yell out for "MOM". I feel like I'm being called.

I'm aware that the sun is beginning to come up. I cover my head with the covers and continue to sleep, semi sleep. I hear Matt's knee pop a high pitched pop aa he straightens his legs to stand up. I instantly think of my dad and how his knees popped exactly like this all the time. Matt comes to help me move to my bed. The sun has risen.

I move to the bed for the day or until I wake up feeling refreshed. The medicine effects have lessened and I can walk by myself now. However the medicine is still working throughout this day and night. Laying there in a semi awake state, a couple of my questions are answered. I hydrate. My bucket is still next to me, but my stomach has been stellar all night and day.

By late afternoon, I was up sitting outside, drinking coconut water and eating water melon. My legs felt weak and walking was slow. In summary, my first iboga journey was primarily about physical healing and rest. The medicine decides to work specific to an individual's needs. There were a couple of answers received and a glimpse into the psychedelic world. It's way too early to judge an experience. The medicine and it's answers will continue to work.... and my second journey takes flight tonight.Read more