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Bahamas
  • Jessica Ekman
  • Jessica Ekman

Bahamas

So, my ex and I decided to go to the Bahamas together. Nothing says 'maybe we can make this work again' like tropical beaches and the constant sound of crashing waves—perfect for drowning out any awkward silences. ❤️ Read more
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  • Trip start
    November 14, 2024
    Jessica EkmanBahamasTraveler

    Stockholm

    Nov 13–14, 2024 in Sweden ⋅ ☁️ 6 °C

    Oh, where do I even begin with this trip of a lifetime?! I should have known the Bahamas with my ex was going to be an adventure, but THIS? 😂 #BuckleUp

    It all started when my beloved ex was like, “Hey, babe, need to bring some aluminum thingys for my new house on Rose Island. Shouldn’t be a big deal, right?” Cue to me, thinking, “Oh, a couple of pipes or something lightweight? No problem!” #Underestimated #FamousLastWords 😅

    But fast forward to the morning of, and BAM, 130 KILOS of checked baggage!! 😳 I’m not kidding, friends—130 kilos of long-ass, 20-30 kilo each packages that we had to squeeze into my car. Between the groaning of my front suspension and the windshield cracking (oh yeah, THAT happened), I’m there, questioning my entire life. Meanwhile, my ex? Cool as a cucumber. 🤘😎 #ChillVibes #NotPanickingAtAll

    But the real “fun” started in Stockholm! Bless those airport employees, but do they know how to make a big deal out of EVERYTHING. We tried to check in the night before (smart, right?!) but had to spend two solid hours arguing, educating, and holding back eye rolls while they called every supervisor in the country. They were convinced we were trying to sneak a bridge into the Bahamas or something. 🤯

    I kept my cool (but it was very close I had to walk away) and reminded them we checked the website, we’d done all the due diligence, but did they care? Nope! #RuleFollowers #ServiceWhatNow

    Finally, they saw the light (or just got too tired of us to keep going) and let us through. And let me tell you, we celebrated like it was Mardi Gras because I didn’t have to lift a finger at 4 a.m. to lug those beasts of a suitcase. 🥂🍾💃 #Thankful #NotAChance

    Checked into the hotel, tossed what was left of our luggage aside like it was cursed, and then hit the restaurant. With some good wine, all the packing drama became just a hazy, hilarious memory (or that’s what I tell myself). We ate, we laughed, and we passed out before anyone could say “Aluminum.” 😴

    Moral of the story: next time your ex wants to go to the Bahamas with a construction load, RUN Or bring wine.    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanBahamasTraveler

    Miami

    Nov 14–15, 2024 in the United States ⋅ ☀️ 27 °C

    Oh honey, the saga continues! 🌴✈️ #BaggageChronicles

    o, we finally got on the plane from Sweden to Frankfurt, and let me tell you, it was blissfully uneventful. No drama, no aluminum shenanigans, just two jet-lagged zombies passing out and waking up like discount Sleeping Beauties. 🤣 The flight attendants probably thought we were hungover, but nope, just pure exhaustion. #GlamorousLife #BeautySleepFailed

    But THEN, we landed in Miami. And that’s when the real nightmare began. Picture this: me, staring down the mountain of our 130 kilos of “house parts” and realizing I might have to cuddle with aluminum beams in a hotel bed. 😱 My brain was spiraling, imagining the cabbie’s face when we’d show up with these packages, or worse, me trying to fit it all into a single elevator. BUT HOLD UP—guess who came to the rescue? My beloved ex, who apparently moonlights as a bribery wizard. 🤫💰 With some smooth-talking (and probably a little green persuasion), he got someone to whisk away our stuff to a storage center. Not only that, but it was conveniently RIGHT across from Bahamas Air, where we’d be tomorrow. Bless his sneaky, charming little heart. #ProblemSolver #AluminumWhisperer

    With that weight off our shoulders (literally), we finally got to enjoy Miami! First stop: the hotel. After a shower that felt like being reborn, we dolled ourselves up, ready to take on the night. My hair? Fabulous. My ex? Still looking suspiciously cool, as if he hadn’t just orchestrated an aluminum heist earlier. 😂

    We celebrated with a fancy drink that looked like a million bucks but tasted like $1.50 juice from the dollar store. It didn’t even matter; we were in Miami, baby! 🍹✨ #ExpensiveAndGross

    Then, the real temptation struck—I stumbled into the coolest clothing store and almost set my wallet on fire. I swear, everything was screaming my name. Of course, I had to make a stop at Steve Madden because SHOES ARE LIFE. 👠❤️ My beloved ex had to literally drag me out of there before I emptied my bank account. “Jessica,” he said, “we haven’t even reached the Bahamas yet.” Okay, fair, but like… shoes. #Shopaholic #Priorities

    Oh, and did I mention we went skinny dipping? 🌊✨ Yeah, it was cold as hell, and my ex almost lost a toe. Who knew ocean water could feel like the Arctic? I ended up playing Nurse Jessica, wrapping him up in towels and trying not to laugh too hard at his over-the-top dramatics. #Heroic #ICouldBeADoctor

    And now, today’s the big day—we’re finally flying to the Bahamas! 🙌 Please, universe, I am BEGGING you: no more arguing with the airline about baggage. We’ve paid our dues. Let us board in peace and carry on with our tropical adventure. 🏝️🙏

    Stay tuned—because if this trip has taught me anything, it’s that there’s always a plot twist around the corner. 😉 #BahamasBound    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanBahamasTraveler

    Nassau landing

    November 15, 2024 on the Bahamas ⋅ ⛅ 27 °C

    Ohhh, the drama and adventure continues, my friends! 🌴✈️ #BahamasBound

    So, this morning started on a shockingly smooth note— no baggage drama at check-in. Can you even believe it? Honestly, I was bracing for another two-hour argument with some overworked airline employee, but nope, it was like the heavens opened, and the travel gods whispered, "Let them pass." 🙌✨ #MiraclesDoHappen

    But then, we landed in the Bahamas, and let me tell you, customs was NOT feeling chill vibes today. They started opening our aluminum packages like it was Christmas morning—but without the joy. 🎁🤯 And of course, did they even tape it back up? LOL, no. They left everything flapping in the wind like a DIY art installation. #ThanksForNothing

    Once we were finally free from customs, the real fun began—riding on the trunk of a car. Yes, you read that right. Apparently, that’s totally legal in the Bahamas, and let me tell you, it’s a vibe. 🚙✨ There I was, perched on the trunk, taking in the sun and feeling like the queen of chaos. Because why not? When in the Bahamas, ride trunks and live your best life! ☀️👑 #IslandStyle #LegalButQuestionable

    Next up: boating out to the island with our now slightly mangled (thanks, customs!) baggage. Honestly, I was just happy none of it fell into the ocean. Smooth sailing, right? Well, until I decided it was time to tackle my fear of heights. Yup, climbing up onto the roof of the house felt like signing my own death certificate. 🧗‍♀️😵 But I did it! Kinda. Okay, I got up there, freaked out, and prayed to come back down. Baby steps, okay? Tomorrow, maybe I’ll conquer it. Or not. #PhobiaChronicles

    But the day wasn’t all stress. We kicked back with some fancy drinks (finally, one that tasted as good as it looked!) and hung out with the chillest neighbor ever. 🍹✨ Just chatting, laughing, and soaking up the vibes. Oh, and we spotted a turtle! 🐢❤️ If that’s not a sign of good luck, I don’t know what is.

    Now, it’s an early night for me because let’s be real—I’m *so over* lifting luggage and my adrenaline reserves are officially tapped out. Tomorrow, though? Who knows. Maybe I’ll befriend the turtle, maybe I’ll face-plant trying to climb a ladder. Stay tuned for more chaotic island adventures! 🏝️✨ #TiredButHappy #IslandLife    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanBahamasTraveler

    Rose Island

    November 15, 2024, North Atlantic Ocean ⋅ ⛅ 26 °C

    So, my ex and I ended up on Rose Island, and let me tell you, it was already shaping up to be a vibe. But THEN we met this German guy named Mike, and everything went next-level. Imagine a dude with the coolest, darkest voice—literally, he sounded like the Terminator. I was lowkey expecting him to say, “I’ll be back.” 😂 But plot twist: Mike turned out to be the NICEST guy ever!

    Turns out, Mike is totally obsessed with lights and music. Like, the man had put lights EVERYWHERE. 💡✨ Fairy lights, LED strips, probably had a disco ball in his pocket for emergencies—who knows. And honestly, I was OBSESSED. It was like walking into a Pinterest board, but way cooler.

    What killed me was that he’s even more immature about lights than my ex, which I didn’t think was possible. The two of them together were like kids in a candy store, geeking out over setups while I sat there making mental notes to kidnap Mike and bring him to Sweden someday to light up my entire house. I’m serious—it was THAT good.

    We spent the evening chatting, soaking in the cozy vibes, with great music playing in the background. 🎶✨ It was the perfect mix of chill and fun. Honestly, who knew the Terminator had such great taste in ambience? Mike, if you’re reading this, pack your lights and get ready for Sweden. #RoseIslandVibes #TerminatorWithFairyLights #LightningGoals #CozyAndLit    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanBahamasTraveler

    The donut Beachbar

    November 16, 2024, North Atlantic Ocean ⋅ ☁️ 26 °C

    🌴 The Bahamas Chronicles: A Sweaty Reunion & a Wild Beach Club Adventure! 🌊☀️

    So there I was, sweating like a maniac 🥵 while building at Mat's house on Rose Island. All I wanted was a nice cold shower to revive my soul. JUST as I’m about to jump in, guess who shows up? Marcus and Nelly… with their American friend squad in tow! It felt like forever since we'd last met, and there I am, greeting them half-naked in a towel. #AwkwardHug #SorryForTheSweat

    💨 In record time, I managed a lightning-fast shower (still probably sweating, though) and tried to look somewhat presentable for our visit to the new Beach Club. Let me just say—WOW. This place is pure magic! 🌅 Beautiful vibes, crystal-clear water, and the kind of laughter that makes your stomach hurt.

    🎭 THEN, the pièce de résistance—meeting the infamous Mark for the very first time. Within seconds, this absolute legend POPS HIS EYE OUT (yes, you read that right 👀🤯) and hands it to me like it’s no big deal. I’m standing there, holding an EYEBALL, thinking, “I freaking LOVE this dude.” 😂😂 #IconicMoments

    We spent the rest of the day chatting, laughing, and soaking in the paradise vibes. Honestly, it was one of those unforgettable days that will be retold forever. 🌟 Who knew sweaty hellos and rogue eyeballs could lead to such an epic adventure?

    #BahamasLife #RoseIsland #SweatyButHappy #EyeballChronicles    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanBahamasTraveler

    Four season

    November 17, 2024 on the Bahamas ⋅ ☁️ 26 °C

    Ohhh, another day of chaos, sweat, and mimosas in the Bahamas! 🌴💪🍾 #IslandLifeAtItsFinest

    So today was all about channeling our inner lumberjacks. 🪓💥 First, we tackled this pile of old sawed wood that must’ve been cursed because it weighed as much as a small planet. Seriously, who needs a gym when you’ve got “island chores”? And just when my arms were ready to quit, we went and chopped down a TREE. 🌳🔥 Let me tell you, it was a workout worthy of its own reality show. #SurvivorBahamas #WoodYouRather

    But don’t worry—we know how to reward ourselves. After sweating like maniacs, we hopped in the boat and cruised into the city for some much-needed brunch therapy. 🌊🚤 Destination: the Four Seasons, because duh, we’re classy like that. ✨ The food was fab, the vibes were unmatched, and let’s talk about those MIMOSAS. 🍾🥂 They just kept coming! I blinked, and another one magically appeared. Is this what heaven feels like?

    Oh, and the highlight of brunch? My friend Nelly breaking into a mini concert! 🎤👼 Like, who knew she had the voice of an actual angel? we were all just sitting there in awe. Pretty sure she was serenading my lobster at one point. 😂 #NewAdeleWho #BrunchGoals

    After all that fabulousness, we boated back to our little hideout on the island. 🌅✨ And as the sun went down, so did our energy levels. Early bedtime for the win because, let’s face it, once it’s dark out here, there’s literally nothing to do except count stars or bugs. 🌌🤣

    Now, I’m just lying here, the only one awake, staring at the ceiling and praying morning comes fast because I’ve already scrolled through every app on my phone twice. Why does time move SO slow at night? 😩⏳ #RestlessInParadise #SunriseCantComeSoonEnough

    Tomorrow, who knows? More wood? More mimosas? Maybe I’ll chop down a forest while Nelly sings the soundtrack of my life. Stay tuned for more island shenanigans! 🏝️✨ #IslandChronicles    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanBahamasTraveler

    Rose Island

    November 17, 2024, North Atlantic Ocean ⋅ 🌬 26 °C

    So the day consisted of working on the house climbing like a monkey on the walls up to the really high roof. But hey I managed even if im very scared of heights. I dont know how high it is maybe 9 meters up. Got spaghetti legs all the time 🤣 then we met our beloved friends. So happy to see you guys again ❤️ and sadly ny beloved ex got a bit sick so the rest of the day was trying to get some medicin and resging and playing cards. They crushed me in card games 🤣 but hey at least we had fun.Oh, what a day, my friends! The Bahamas adventures continue, and let me tell you, it was a mix of monkey business, spaghetti legs, and card game humiliation. 🐒🃏 #NeverADullMoment

    So, the day kicked off with some serious house work, and guess who decided to channel their inner Tarzan (but way less graceful)? That’s right—ME. 🧗‍♀️💪 Climbing those walls and tackling that terrifying 8 or 9-meter-high roof like a total champ. Well, maybe not a champ… more like a shaky-legged, mildly panicked monkey clinging for dear life. But hey, I DID IT. Spaghetti legs and all! 🍝😂 #ConqueringFears #MonkeyMode

    After the great roof escapade, we reunited with our beloved friends, and OMG, my heart was so full! It’s always the best feeling to see your people again. ❤️✨ Cue hugs, laughs, and a little too much catching up. #IslandReunion #GoodVibesOnly

    But then, plot twist: my beloved ex started feeling a bit under the weather. 🤒😭 Poor thing! Of course, Nurse Jessica was back in action, but the real hero was Marcus who fixed all medicin and drove it out to us. So grateful ❤️ 🏅🩺 #NurseLife #HeroicEfforts

    The rest of the day? A chill vibe of playing cards with the crew. And when I say “playing,” I really mean “getting absolutely DESTROYED.” 🤣 I don’t even know how I kept losing, but they crushed me, game after game. Like, was there a secret team strategy against me or what?! Still, it was all in good fun—lots of laughing and some light trash-talking (okay, mostly from me). 🃏🔥 #LoserButHappy #NextTimeIllWin

    Now, it’s time to wind down and recharge because tomorrow’s another day in paradise. Whether it’s more climbing, card humiliation, or turtle spotting, I’m ready for it.    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanBahamasTraveler

    The dock

    November 18, 2024 on the Bahamas ⋅ ☁️ 24 °C

    So, my ex and I were living the island life when we hopped on a boat from Rose Island to pick up this guy who, spoiler alert, NEVER SHOWED UP. 🚤🙄 Yup, a completely unnecessary boat trip. Thanks for that, mystery dude! Classic Bahamian randomness—you gotta love it. 😂 #IslandLifeChaos

    But hey, no time for grumpiness! We’re in paradise, after all. 🌴☀️ Positive spin? We got some unexpected alone time and a scenic boat ride, which, let’s be real, wasn’t the worst thing ever. The ocean was gorgeous, the vibes were chill, and honestly, it was kind of hilarious just waiting around for a guy who clearly had better things to do. 😂

    Lesson learned: Bahamians are amazing but sometimes…you just gotta roll with the island schedule (which means no schedule at all). 🕒✌️ Either way, we made the best of it, cruising back to Rose Island and laughing about how ridiculous it all was. #BoatAdventures #NoShowNoProblem #MakingTheBestOfIt #BahamasVibes    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanBahamasTraveler

    Baha mar

    Nov 22–23, 2024 on the Bahamas ⋅ 🌬 23 °C

    So me and my ex decided to treat ourselves to a mini escape at the luxurious Baha Mar resort—because, after days of lugging building materials and making trips to the city for house projects, we deserved it! 🏝️🛠️💦 #WorkHardPlayHard

    As soon as we got there, the vibes hit differently. Soft white sands, turquoise water, and the sweet promise of no heavy lifting. 🙌 First stop: the bar, because why not? 🍹 While sipping on something that tasted like vacation in a glass, we met this amazing couple. They were so fun, and we ended up chatting like we’d known them forever. #VacationFriendsAreTheBest

    Then came the casino adventure. 🎰✨ Let me just say, my ex got a little too cozy with Lady Luck (or maybe not so lucky). At one point, he was fully possessed by the gambling devil 👿—I’m talking eyes-glued-to-the-machine, "just one more round" vibes. 🤦‍♀️💸 Spoiler alert: he didn’t win. At all.

    Cue me stepping in: “Okay, fun’s over—back away from the slots, sir.” 🤣 Once we called it quits on his money-losing streak, we headed back for more drinks. 🍸 Let’s just say, the tipsy giggles were REAL. The rest of the night was a blissful blur of laughs, relaxation, and swearing we’d hit the gym...tomorrow. (Spoiler: we didn’t.)

    10/10 would recommend a “let’s forget about reality for a hot minute” getaway. 🌴💃 #BahaMarMagic #ExesWhoRelax #CasinoChaos    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanBahamasTraveler

    Baha mar club 25

    November 22, 2024 on the Bahamas ⋅ 🌬 23 °C

    So, my ex and I decided to hit up the beach club at Baha Mar, thinking we’d live the dream. You know, sun, sand, cocktails—peak island vibes. Spoiler: it was a comedy of errors. We started the day like pros, devouring food like we hadn’t eaten in years 🍔🍹 and guzzling drinks like it was a competition. Life was good. But then, as we reclined on the sunbeds ready to bask in the Bahamas heat, we realized something crucial: IT WAS FREEZING. 🥶

    Like, how is it even possible? We’re in the freakin’ Bahamas! Shouldn't it be the kind of hot that has you begging for shade? Nope. Instead, we were shivering under towels like a couple of washed-up seals 🦭, looking at each other and silently regretting every life choice that led us here. #BeachFail #TropicalFreeze

    I must have been on the brink of hypothermia when my ex, inexplicably full of energy, decided it was time to hit the water slides. I was like, "Are you kidding? We’re already freezing, and you want to willingly soak yourself in ice water?" 🫠 But somehow, I was dragged along. Peer pressure is real.

    The slide was towering, and as soon as we started climbing, I knew this was going to be a disaster. The moment we launched down, my survival instincts kicked in, and I unleashed a scream so loud and deranged, people probably thought someone was being murdered. 🔪😱 Kids were covering their ears, parents were glaring at me like, who let this lunatic in? Meanwhile, my ex was having the time of his life, laughing so hard I thought he'd choke. 😂

    We hit the water at the bottom, and of course, it was arctic. 🌊❄️ But at that point, I was laughing too hard to care. We stumbled out, shaking like wet dogs, and decided to call it a day. Lesson learned: even in the Bahamas, always pack for winter. And maybe don't let your ex pick the activities. #BahamasAdventures #FreezingFun #SendHelp #BeachClubFails    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanBahamasTraveler

    Båt tur och footprints med boysen

    November 24, 2024 on the Bahamas ⋅ ☁️ 24 °C

    So, my ex and I, along with the rest of the crew, decided to live our best lives and hop on a boat tour. 🌊⛵ Armed with coconut rum, cola, and zero self-control, we set sail to explore all these tiny, random islands scattered around. Each one was weirder than the last, but we were too busy vibing to care. The sun was out, the music was blasting 🎶, and we were sipping drinks like we owned the ocean. #BoatLife #RumTherapy

    Of course, things escalated—because why wouldn’t they? The rum was flowing, and let’s just say the mixers became optional. At one point, I just went full pirate mode and started sipping rum straight from the bottle. 🏴‍☠️🥥 #WhenInBahamas

    We stopped at this spot called Footprints for lunch, but here’s the plot twist: I COMPLETELY forgot to eat. Like, who does that? 🙈 I was so tipsy, I probably thought rum counted as a food group. Meanwhile, everyone else was enjoying their meals, and I was just living in my coconut-rum-fueled fantasy.

    It was hands down one of the best days ever—great vibes, great drinks, questionable decisions, and a lot of laughter. Definitely went home with a sunburn instead of a tan because priorities. #BoatAdventures #CoconutRumVibes #TipsyAndThriving    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanBahamasTraveler

    Dinner at Mike

    November 25, 2024, North Atlantic Ocean ⋅ ⛅ 25 °C

    We had the most epic night! 🌊🚤 After our pirate-worthy adventure of boating and sipping coconut rum like we were straight out of a swashbuckling film, we sailed right into Mike’s Place. Yes, THE Mike—the guy with the dark, sexy voice that could literally read a grocery list and make it sound like a James Bond movie. 😏🎤

    But WAIT—things got real when we saw the lobster. 🦞 It was HUGE. Like, Terminator arm huge. We’re talking the kind of lobster that looks like it could pick up a car, then eat it for dinner. 🍽️💪 pure magic in the kitchen, and oh my goodness… it was DELICIOUS. Like, I’m still dreaming about it. 👌

    The night kept getting better with more music, more drinks (hello, mojitos! 🍹), and even cooler lamps. 💡 Like, next-level lighting that made us all feel like we were in some kind of tropical disco palace. 🌴✨

    Honestly, it was a blissful evening, surrounded by amazing company and unforgettable vibes. 💖 #LobsterGoals #CoconutRumPirates #MikesPlaceMagic #EpicEvening #GoodVibesOnly #LivingOurBestLife #TheVoiceOfMike #LobsterLikeABoss #TropicalChill    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanBahamasTraveler

    Restaurant Latitude

    November 25, 2024 on the Bahamas ⋅ ☁️ 25 °C

    Oh, where do I even begin with this one? Picture this: me, Mats, and the squad (yes, I’ve officially been crowned the boss—don’t question it 😎👑) living our best lives in the Bahamas 🌴🌊. Naturally, we decided to hit up Latitude, a swanky restaurant everyone’s been raving about. But before we could even think about food, we had a little… situation 😬.

    Remember Mike? The guy with the voice so deep it could probably scare off a thunderstorm and a face that looks like it was crafted by celestial beings 😇🎤? Yeah, that Mike. Well, let’s just say there were some “dockpeople” who apparently didn’t realize they were messing with our squad 🙅‍♀️💪. Mike steps up, all calm and collected, but with this vibe like, “Don’t make me unleash my angelic wrath.” If I didn’t know him better, I’d have been hiding behind a palm tree myself 🌴😂. Whatever he said or did worked because, poof, problem solved! 🙌

    So off we went to Latitude, high spirits intact 🍹. The menu looked amazing, the vibes were immaculate, and the food? Well… mostly great. My pasta, though? Let’s just say it had been through some things 🍝😭. Overcooked not once but twice. Twice! At that point, I was like, “Okay, Universe, I get it. No more pasta here.” The flavor was nice, though, so it wasn’t a total flop. Note to self: stick to seafood next time 🦞👌.

    The evening was full of laughs, great company, and good vibes all around 🥂✨. When it was time to head back, we had to navigate the pitch-black waters. But guess who saved the day? None other than Mats, our fearless captain extraordinaire ⚓🧭. He handled that boat like it was second nature—smooth, confident, and probably humming a tune while the rest of us tried not to trip over each other in the dark 😂🌌.

    All in all? A night for the books 📖🎉. Even with pasta drama and dockpeople antics, the Bahamas delivered as always. Cheers to more adventures, more laughs, and hopefully less overcooked pasta! 😅💃 #SquadGoals #BahamasAdventures #CaptainMats #OvercookedDrama #MikeTheAngel    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanBahamasTraveler

    Footprints with ex

    November 25, 2024 on the Bahamas ⋅ ⛅ 25 °C

    Okay, buckle up for this wild ride! 😂 So, picture this: my beloved ex (who’s honestly the nicest guy ever, like Santa’s cool cousin) lets people borrow his stuff all the time. But, shocker—people can’t seem to take care of anything, and now, they’ve trashed his brand new jetski. 😡 Like, angry ex vibes level 100.

    Anyway, to blow off some steam, he pulls out his personal standing jetski (the one he actually cares about) and is living his best life, zooming around like he’s in an action movie. 🎥💥 Meanwhile, me and Mike are chillin’ on the bridge, watching the chaos unfold. ⛅️

    Enter Mats. The guy literally drops the jetski, and then, in true Mats fashion, casually says, “Oh fuck, it’s sinking.” 🚨🙄 So now we’re all running around like lunatics, trying to lift this mega heavy jetski out of the water. Spoiler: it doesn't go well. 💀 And just like that, the whole day feels like it’s in ruins. 😩

    I turn to my ex and say, “Okay, we need a damn break because EVERYTHING is broken right now.” So we hop on the boat (cue rum and good vibes 🥃) and head off to look at his other properties. We wave at his beach club neighbors like we're royalty 👑, munch on some snacks and just vibe.

    Then, we cruise over to Footprint, and I, like, pass out on a sunbed. 🛏️ Next thing I know, I wake up like, “Oh shit, we’ve been here for way too long!” But honestly, after the disaster of the morning, this is turning into a pretty damn good day. 😎🌞

    And let’s not forget the part where my ex had me running around like a laughing lunatic—so yes, that definitely happened. 😂 #JetskiDrama #BahamasVibes #ExesAndRum #SinkingJetski #Munchies #FootprintChill #RidingTheWave #BestiesAndBeaches #IslandLife    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanBahamasTraveler

    Dinner at Mark

    November 26, 2024 on the Bahamas ⋅ 🌙 25 °C

    So, picture this: me and my ex, Bahamas vibes, heading to Mark's place for dinner. Mark—aka Mr. Glitter Eye (yes, one glittery eye because of some INSANE accident that’s so wild I didn’t even ask too many questions). He’s got this energy that’s like sunshine in human form, with a smile so warm it could solve global warming. ☀️👁️✨ #GlitterMarkRocks

    We roll into his stunning house, and honestly? I was floored. Beautiful doesn’t even cut it. Then, he casually takes us to his office, and BOOM—it’s packed with stuff. I’m talking “organized chaos meets creative genius” vibes. 📚🎨 It was like walking into the mind of a mad, fabulous scientist. Oh, and the pièce de résistance? His collection of COSTUMES. Like, an entire wardrobe straight out of a Broadway show. 🎭👗

    Was I surprised? Honestly, no. Mark is exactly the kind of person you’d expect to have a glittery eye and 500 costumes. Did I want to try them all on? Obviously. But that would’ve taken a full week, and let’s be real, I had sushi to eat. 🍣💃

    The night took an even funnier turn when my ex did his legendary bathroom routine. Cue him coming out, sheepishly asking Mark if he had any plumber tools. 🪠😂 I nearly spat out my wine laughing, but Mark, the hero he is, swooped in and fixed it like a pro. Meanwhile, my ex was dying of embarrassment and whisper-pleading for me to save him. Nope, buddy, you’re on your own.

    Mark is the kind of guy who’s so full of life and charisma, you leave feeling recharged and slightly obsessed. Truly, a crazy, hilarious lunatic in the best way possible.

    #BahamasAdventures #GlitterEyeVibes #CostumeGoals #ToiletFailsAndSushiTales    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanBahamasTraveler

    The British colonial hotel

    Nov 27–28, 2024 on the Bahamas ⋅ ☁️ 26 °C

    Our last night in the Bahamas was supposed to be chill and classy at the British Colonial Hotel—but, of course, chaos decided to RSVP. Check-in turned into an event. It felt like they were running a background check on us or something because it took FOREVER. Apparently, they had checked someone else into our room? (Who was this mysterious room-stealer?!) Meanwhile, my ex, who has the patience of a toddler waiting for candy, hit his breaking point and just walked away.

    Next thing I know, he’s back with ice cream in hand 🍦, muttering under his breath, “How long can it possibly take to hand us a room key?!” Honestly, the man was not wrong, but seeing him angrily eating ice cream while we waited was the highlight of my evening. #StressEating #HotelDrama

    Eventually, after what felt like THREE HOURS, we finally got our room. I don't know if it was because we were too exhausted to care, but we threw our stuff down, took the quickest showers of our lives, and headed straight to the restaurant. Enter Marcus, the star of the night! We had such a great time chatting, eating delicious food (because, priorities), and saying our goodbyes to our friend. #FoodFixesEverything

    The night ended on a sweet note, but the universe wasn’t going to let us bask in the glow for long—we had to be up stupidly early. Love that for us. At least we left with full bellies, funny memories, and a story to tell about the world’s longest hotel check-in. #BahamasAdventures #HotelFails #GoodFoodGreatFriends    Read more

  • Jessica EkmanBahamasTraveler

    Few hours in miami

    November 28, 2024 in the United States ⋅ ⛅ 26 °C

    So, picture this: my ex and I land in Miami with a few hours before our flight back to Sweden, and as you can imagine, my ADHD ex CANNOT just chill at the airport. 🛬✈️ He’s like, “Let’s go to South Beach!” and honestly, thank goodness we did, because that adventure was EVERYTHING.

    We’re wandering around South Beach, soaking in the vibes, when we stumble upon this insane store. 🛍️ The kind of place that’s so cool and chaotic you have to walk in. Naturally, I spotted this odd, funky jacket for my ex and forced him to try it on (he was NOT thrilled). But let me tell you, it looked so bizarrely amazing that I basically bullied him into buying it. #FashionIconOrVictim

    Meanwhile, the guys working at this store were absolute lunatics—in the BEST way. While my ex was trying on clothes, they started handing me vodka shots. 🍸 One, two, three… by the third, I was like, “Guys, I have to board an international flight—I cannot be this tipsy in the air.” 😂 But they were so sweet and crazy fun that I’m already planning a return trip to check out their women’s store, because if their men’s section is this good, the women’s must be next-level.

    It was hands-down an unforgettable day—Miami chaos, vodka-fueled shopping, and questionable decisions. Who needs airport lounges when you’ve got South Beach and lunatic fashionistas? Next time, I’m heading back, jacket in tow. #LayoverAdventures #SouthBeachStyle #VodkaAndVibes    Read more

    Trip end
    November 28, 2024
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