There's paper towels in my shoesJune 25, 2016 in Ireland
This is going to be a long post... And full of shenanigans aplenty. If you're not in the mood to read a novel OR are sensitive to situations that are obviously super fun, stop reading NOW!
Yesterday, after getting back from the Blarney Stone, we needed to eat. We met these two AWESOME friends from the US named Ricarrdo and Azerae and we decided that after we both got back to our respective hotels and ate, we would meet up for drinks later in the night. Taylor, Shaunessa and I had a delicious meal of McDonalds (which is way better here, honestly) we got a message from Ricarrdo saying to meet him at karaoke at a bar called Woolshed and that Azurae wasnt feeling well.
After adventuring what seems like all over to try and find the bar, we got there and immediately got some beer. I'm not going to bore you with all of the details, but we submitted a song to sing (Shania Twain, obv.) and the karaoke DJ DENIED us saying that he would rather Shoot Himself then listen to Shania... HOW RUDE. so obviously, we decided to leave because no one needs that sort of negativity in their lives.
Ok, no, actually the bar closed at 1:30... WHAT KIND OF BAR CLOSES AT 130 ESPECIALLY IN DUBLIN?? ISNT THAT ILLEGAL?? We were making plans to head to another bar when Ricarrdo said he was TIRED and wanted to head back to sleep... Because CANADIANS GO HARD, man.
So we decided to adventure through the city and find another place to procure some alcoholic beverages. On the way, we stumbled upon a gentleman who looked lost, holding a map. He asked us for directions and, being the helpful Canadians we are, decided to lead him in the right direction. Also he promised to buy us each a beer. So Taylor grabbed the map and we forged along.... Except none of us had any clue where we were going and we kind of lead the poor guy around in circles.
After a while, we asked a local and he decided to take pity on our drunk, lost, tourist selves and take us to the bar. Once we got to the bar, our new friend (the lost one) introduced us to his 2 brothers, let us know they were from New Jersey and bought us each a pint of Guinness. We were at this bar called Pygmalion, and it was closer to 2:30 am at this point... And the bar was closing down.
LIKE SERIOUSLY WHAT THE HECK DUBLIN HOW ARE YOUR BARS CLOSED DOWN SO EARLY? IT WAS THURSDAY AHHHHH.
So we ditched the boys from Jersey and wandered off again to find a bar that was open later. I'm not going to go into specifics here... But on the way we were caught off guard by a rick shaw and ended up nearly peeing our pants 😏.
As we rounded a corner... Guess who we ran into... THE BOYS FROM NEW JERSEY. LIKE WHAT ARE THE CHANCES??? As we stopped to talk to the one who we originally brought to the bar, we noticed his 2 brothers had ditched him completely and he was left alone. Again. With no clue where he was or how to get to his hotel. Oy.
Obviously, being the great Canadians we are, we had to help him get to his hotel safely... And for some reason HE TRUSTED ME WITH THE MAP AGAIN. LIKE DID YOU NOT LEARN YOUR LESSON THE FIRST TIME?? Fortunately his hotel was in an area that we knew pretty well, so we actually got him there in one piece and without incident.
When we arrived at the hotel, it was nearly 3:30am and he invited us up foe some snacks and to hang out. We headed up and walked into the room where his 2 brothers already were, sitting and eating a weird Doritos salsa dip (wtf?!) and Doritos! We chatted for a bit, making them laugh harder than little girls when they decided we needed more chips. The youngest brother went down (with his brothers credit card) and came up a few minutes later with 2 salsa jars, 2 bags of chips and a drink... Telling us he had spent 50 euro on it. Excuse me? How the heck did that cost 50 euro???.... Oh... He dropped 2 jars and they shattered and the front desk made him pay for all 4 jars. We were absolutely dying of laughter, and realized it was nearly 4:30am and we should probably head back. I used the bathroom before leaving, and we headed into the stairwell to exit.
When we got to the stairs, I pulled some shampoo and soap out of her purse and I had taken it from the brothers' hotel... To which we immediately collapsed in the stairwell and died of laughter... what can I say... we were running out & they get it for free
After nearly an hour walk home (full of snap chats, singing, and making more friends in the street) we made it to the hostel and settled into bed at 530 am.
We had to get up at 830 to go to the Guinness factory.
Canadians go hard.
Quick note about the morning of the Guinness factory, it was raining quite hard on the way there so the three of us had our ponchos on to stay dry. Of course we looked like we were wearing sperm suits and acted accordingly.
Never a dull moment.Read more