New Zealand

A 22-day adventure by Joanna Read more

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Trip start
November 9, 2018
New Zealand Joanna Turner
New Zealand
November 11, 2018 in New Zealand ⋅ ☁️ 14 °C
Day one in Auckland! We arrived mid morning having spent the last 24 hours travelling. I had no idea how I was feeling and seemed incapable of functioning but thankfully was not as tired as I thought I would be thanks to having a spare seat in our row in the long flight from Dubai (thank you Dane Cleaver!) we got the bus into town and then got an Uber to our air bnb which is a cute little annexe in someone’s house not far from one of the main streets in Auckland. We jumped in the shower as we smelled like goat then headed (rather aimlessly) our into the city. The travelling gods were kind to us as we walked past a craft beer place where we had a pint and fish burgers just what we needed. The sun had come out so we decided to go up the Sky Tower to check out the views which were good. Neither of us were making much sense at this point so we decided to head back and try and stay awake until the evening. We lasted 10 minutesRead more
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New Zealand Joanna Turner
Waiheke
November 12, 2018 in New Zealand ⋅ ⛅ 18 °C
I woke up at 3:30 and knew within seconds that I was not going to go back to sleep. This was not helped by the realisation that my Revolut card loaded with £1000 was not where I thought it was. Bugger. Cue panicked message to Lucy to go round to the flat and look in a pile of papers and stuff which was the only place I could think it could be. So without my card and being locked out of the app I am completely dependent on Phil for cash like a 1950s housewife. I could get used to it but I think it might wear a bit thin with him. With all my extra insomnia induced time I looked into stuff to do in Auckland which turns out isn’t that much. When Phil surfaced we decided to go to Waiheke, an island just outside of Auckland. We got the boat over (I have a magnet and have now been on a boat so can go home happy!) and started on a trail round the island which blew our little minds straight away. Unfortunately part of the trail was shut off so we had to cross inland where we discovered that it was an error to have not put any sun cream on and the spare jumper and hat I’d packed definitely wouldn’t be necessary. We ended up at Oneroa Beach which was beautiful (I am going to have to find more adjectives soon). We stopped for some food and local wine before heading back to Auckland sipping beers on the top deck of the boat. I then discovered my phone was not working properly which obviously sent me into a panic of epic proportions like the true millennial I am. We tried a few options of how to fix it but no joy. So I am now completely dependent on Phil. Lucky him. After deciding not to see if there were any tickets left to see Deff Leppard who were playing that night we went to meet Lou in Ponsonby and ate loads of delicious Asian food washed down with countless beers.Read more
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New Zealand Joanna Turner
Britz aboard
November 13, 2018 in New Zealand ⋅ ☀️ 19 °C
We got up and caught an Uber to the Britz place near the airport. Had a lovely driver who loved the chat, mostly about definitions of love and the different states of mind. He didn’t come up for air. After spending over 2 hours at Britz we were on our way in our little camper. After a quick pit stop at the supermarket for essentials (wine, beer, cheese) we headed up to the coromandel peninsula. I asked Phil to do the first drive as we would certainly end up maimed or dead if I got behind the wheel on day one. We divided our time between oohing and aahing and clenching everything within an inch of its life as we went through the amazing scenery (with the bendiest roads with very steep drops) our plan was to head to coromandel town then go to cathedral cove and hot water beach. We worked out (probably too late) that it was not going to be possible to do it all so we only ended up doing hot water beach where we watched people digging into the sand to sit in the thermal water. To be honest they looked a bit mad. We then drove to Waihi (miles away obvs) where we were staying the night, had wine and passed out.Read more
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New Zealand Joanna Turner
Hobbits holes and Redwoods
November 14, 2018 in New Zealand ⋅ ⛅ 19 °C
We both slept well in the camper which was a huge relief as I had convinced myself that I was going to have on average 3 hours a night. The plan was to head to Waitomo to see the glow worm caves then head to Hobbiton but due to our lack of planning (again!) we realised en route that it was it was going to be an expensive ballache to do both so opted to have a chilled day and just see the Hobbit holes. Turns out you have to book in advance so had a 2.5 hour wait for our tour. We used the time to do a bit of planning (good idea) and booking using their iffy WiFi. When it was finally our turn we got on a bus with the worlds most enthusiastic guide and went down to the set which was spectacular (new adjective used) the attention to detail was incredible and we walked through the (real) vegetable patches up the hills to see all 44 of the hobbit holes. I thought it was going to be a total gimmick but it was lovely especially since the sun came out and we got a free beer. We then headed to our campsite which was another hi de hi job but had great facilities before driving to the redwoods and doing the treewalk. We got the whole place to ourself and walked along walkways and platforms in the forest. It was like being back in California again (as much as that makes me sound like a wanker)Read more
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New Zealand Joanna Turner
"Phil have you farted?"
November 15, 2018 in New Zealand ⋅ ⛅ 18 °C
Happy anniversary Team Denmark! We are 4 today. We celebrated by going to Wai-O-Tapu springs just outside Rotorua. It basically smellled like eggy farts but were very beautiful. We weren’t quite sure what to do afterwards so thought we would break up the journey to our next campsite by stopping in Taupo for a beer and some coromandel mussels which were huge and had really pretty green edges to their shells. I was about to steal one when the waitress came to clear our plates which is just as well as I would have forgotten to clean it and it would have stunk out our van for the next two weeks. We then travelled down through tongiriro national park to our campsite. Basically everyone comes here to do the crossing so we managed to book a (very early) shuttle before drinking too much beer and wineRead more
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New Zealand Joanna Turner
We done a mountain!
November 16, 2018 in New Zealand ⋅ ☀️ 18 °C
We were up at 6 to get ready for our Tongiriro hike. This would normally horrify me but we’ve been going to bed so early I probably got more sleep than I normally do at home. We got on a bus with a load of hardcore keeno walkers and I felt a little bit like got no gear or idea in my Topshop jeans and fake down jacket. At least I had walking boots which came in very handy later on. We bimbled along for an hour or so taking loads of photos and wondering what all the fuss was about until we got to the ascent which was an hour of scraggy pathways and deep steps. My legs were not up to getting up the in one go or even two so we stopped when I felt like they were going. There were quite a few tough spots but we went at our own pace and breathed a big sigh of relief when we got to the top. The views were so surreal and utterly breathtaking. The descent was interesting as it was basically sliding down gravelly sand and trying to avoid sliding off the side of the mountain. Again, never been so grateful for my boots. We stopped at the emerald lakes for food then plodded on, wending our way down the side of the mountain. It was an incredible experience and has made me want to do more walking (I might not be saying this when I can’t walk tomorrow)Read more
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New Zealand Joanna Turner
Windy Welly
November 17, 2018 in New Zealand ⋅ ⛅ 16 °C
We got up early as we had a 4 hour drive to Wellington to get through. I woke up feeling really cocky that my legs didn’t ache that much but after a couple of hours sitting in the van I had fully seized up and was hobbling about like I’d shat myself. We got to Wellington just after midday and went straight to Mount Victoria to get the best views of the city before heading to our “campsite” for the night (basically a car park in an out of town hotel) We jumped in an Uber and went straight on the cable car which was fun but not as thrilling as San Francisco and wandered about the botanical gardens for a bit. We were both feeling the burn from the day before so headed to Te Papa museum. They had a really interesting exhibition on about New Zealand’s involvement in WW1 which we spent ages in so we’re pretty info’d out by the time we got to the Maori bit. We rewarded our cultural endeavours with a pint and then went for some sushiRead more
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New Zealand Joanna Turner
Going down on New Zealand
November 18, 2018 in New Zealand ⋅ ⛅ 19 °C
We got up early (just as well as our campsite was a car park on the edge of a highway) and went to the ferry terminal. After leaving the van we went up and paid over the odds for a cooked breakfast before catching the second half of the Ireland All blacks game. Ireland won largely thanks to a thrilling try that we missed due to stuffing our faces with hash browns and baked beans. We got a deck of cards and we’re just about to start a game when we noticed we were pulling into Marlborough Sounds so we headed for the deck with every other person on board. For the next hour we got to oooh and aaah as the boat slowly made its way through. After arriving in Picton we stopped for lunch then made our way to our latest top 10 campsite for food and further planningRead more
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New Zealand Joanna Turner
Wiiiiiiine!
November 19, 2018 in New Zealand ⋅ 🌧 8 °C
Today we went wine tasting so the van was well a truly redundant as we had no intention of driving anywhere. We were picked up just after 10 by our lovely guide Colleen before being driven to two beautiful vineyards with amazing cellar doors. We supped the local wines (Sauvignon blanc,Riesling’s and Pinot noirs) before meeting the rest of our group who joined us for the next part. We/I pretended to know more than we/I actually know whilst trying to conceal how pissed a few thimbles of wine had got us. After a really good lunch we did a couple more vineyards before being dropped off at the campsite. I fear that I am none the wiser about wine than I was beforeRead more
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New Zealand Joanna Turner
Nelson
November 20, 2018 in New Zealand ⋅ ☀️ 14 °C
We had a leisurely wake up and headed to Nelson via some windy but beautiful roads. We stopped at a place called Urban Oyster in the centre of Nelson and Phil got to have some Coromandel oysters (rather him than me) I bought myself a new down jacket that has more than 2 feathers in it as I consider myself an outdoors person now and needed to upgrade. We then stopped off at Tahunanui beach which was massive but had an enormous black cloud over it so we decided to cut our losses and get back in the van. Wise decision. It lashed it down. We became top 10 members today so will dine out on the $2 discounts like we’re millionaires for the next week and a bit. We parked up the van and went straight for the beers. And wine. We have been playing card games this week which I’m picking up/learning to tolerate.Read more
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New Zealand Joanna Turner
Abel Tasman
November 21, 2018 in New Zealand ⋅ ☀️ 15 °C
We were up really early today as we had a trip kayaking in Abel Tasman national park. After a lengthy but necessary briefing we were on the water in a tandem kayak with Phil in charge of steering. The water was so still and clear and it was a beautiful day so we were both feeling pretty smug. We paddled about and ended up on a tiny beach where we were given lunch before starting the hike back which took about 2.5 hours along a trail along the coastline. We rewarded ourselves with some fish and chips before heading back to camp for more beer, wine and cardsRead more
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New Zealand Joanna Turner
Long drive, Hokitika and Franz Josef
November 22, 2018 in New Zealand ⋅ ⛅ 14 °C
We got up early so we could get on the road as Franz Josef is a hefty mile away. I opted for the first leg and did 4 hours without stopping. Needless to say I was walking like a grandma and had a very full bladder when we stopped (at a countdown for more beer) Phil picked up after and we went to Hokitika gorge which was tucked away in the mountains. Unfortunately everyone else had heard about it too but this meant there was a cafe so we stopped for coffee and some weird whitebait omelette thing on a slice of white bread after marvelling at the powder blue water from the swing bridge. Back in the van after that and after 2 hours we were at our latest top 10 which was right in the mountains. Absolutely gorgeous. I think we have beaten our record for getting a beer on the go after parking up todayRead more
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New Zealand Joanna Turner
Franz josef
November 23, 2018 in New Zealand ⋅ ⛅ 14 °C
We had a lie in and a lazy morning which was so nice after legging it about for the last two weeks. The reason was that we were getting a helicopter onto the Franz Josef glacier in the afternoon. No biggie. We got to the place just after midday and were kitted our with waterproofs, boots and crampons and walked to the helicopter landing zone doing our best Arnold swartzenegger a la predator impressions. We then casually jumped into our helicopter and rode the thrilling 3 minute journey to the landing pad on the glacier which was the size of a tea towel. After multiple smug/excited selfies we followed our guide through the glacier which was batshit crazy when you think we were walking on a moving piece of ice which was sliding down the edge of a mountain. It was mind blowing from start to finish and the photos just don’t do it justice. We were also lucky to be the last group up so essentially had the whole glacier to ourselves for a long while before hopping in our choppers to go back to civilisation. A total treat and worth every penny (I haven’t paid yet thanks to credit cards)Read more
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New Zealand Joanna Turner
So this is Queenstown
November 24, 2018 in New Zealand ⋅ ⛅ 16 °C
We left our beautiful camp in the mountains to head to Wanaka and Queenstown. After a longish drive we ended up by the beautiful Lake Wanaka. We mooched for a bit then ate a mega burger before stopping in our favourite shop Macpac for some outdoors inspiration/some cheap t shirts. We ended up in Queenstown via some hair raising roads in the rain and set up camp in our new “home”. A little out of town, thankfully the campsite provided a shuttle into town so buoyed with the prospect of us both being able to booze we headed into town. This dream was quickly dashed when I got IDed in the first bar we went to (they check everyone who looks under 30-i’m not flattered when I have no ID) We tried to persuade the bar staff via dubious photos and WhatsApp messages but they were having none of it so I spent the next half an hour re-enacting the anxiety felt during my life as a 16-17 year old. We thankfully got served in a pub and I gulped down beer like it was going to be taken away from me. We then had the most amazing Japanese food (finally!) at a place called Tanoshi which we could have stayed in and spent a lot of money in but the table was all booked up.Read more
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New Zealand Joanna Turner
Reunions
November 25, 2018 in New Zealand ⋅ ⛅ 12 °C
We got up early and drove through a cloud (!) to Wanaka to meet up with Jonny and Sam who had been at a wedding there and rallied enough to meet us for brekkie and get back on the wine. The best time was had and if we could have I think we could have happy drank the place dry of Sauvignon Blanc. Sadly we had to say goodbye and we headed back to Queenstown and went in the gondola (nice views but expensive) before settling on a bar so I could make up for the drinking I couldn’t do at breakfast (this driving business breaks my heart sometimes) we stopped off for some food at Madame Woos which did nice Asian food then did some laundry because, you know, I need clean pantsRead more
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New Zealand Joanna Turner
Milford Sound
November 26, 2018 in New Zealand ⋅ ⛅ 12 °C
We were up early as it was a mega drive to get to Milford Sound from Queenstown. The drive was beautiful and the scenery some of the best we’ve seen so far. Unfortunately half of New Zealand we’re making their way there too so we got stuck behind quite a few coaches and grandma drivers. We got the last parking space and went to the terminal where we found our thankfully small boat (some of the others were like crap cruise ships). We spent the next 2 hours ambling around the fjord and got to see some seals and penguins. It was lovely but neither of us are entirely sure whether it was worth the days worth of driving. A classic example of tourist peer pressureRead more
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New Zealand Joanna Turner
Arrowtown to Omarama
November 27, 2018 in New Zealand ⋅ ⛅ 12 °C
Last day at our Queenstown campsite. The place we’ve been in the longest. 3 whole nights! We stopped off in a place called Arrowtown on our way. It looks like a set from a goldrush film with sweet and charming little buildings (housing posh/wanky shops) We stopped for a coffee then decided to hit the road. Irritatingly we discovered we got a parking ticket for parking in the wrong direction. Slightly annoying but in the grand scheme of driving misdemeanours I’ll take it. Then it was on to Omarama which is on the edge of Mount Cook national park and turned out to be a right little one horse town whose main attraction is a statue of a sheep. We found a pub and had lunch which was utterly ridiculous. We both thought a steak sandwich would be good but neither of us were expecting a massive baguette with not one but two whole steaks in it. It obviously came with chips just in case just got peckish after your meat guzzle. We waddled back to our campsite, slightly drunk and played shitheadRead more
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New Zealand Joanna Turner
Mount Cook Hookers and hot tubs
November 28, 2018 in New Zealand ⋅ ⛅ 15 °C
We drove for an hour to get to Mount Cook so that we could do the Hooker valley trail which was a nice and easy trail beside Mount Cook which was being a bit of a twat and hiding behind a cloud. We had a good stride out over 3 swing bridges and fortunately the clouds lifted enough so that we could see the snow capped mountain. It definitely feels different here with huge mountains but large open plains which gives it a more desolate feel. Cheery. After driving back we stopped at the hot tubs which were just down the road from the campsite and I’m so glad we did. We were unable to go to Onsen in Queenstown as they were booked up so wanky insta worthy photos felt like a pipe dream. We had our own hot tub which was filled with crystal clear and clean mountain water which was heated by a wood stove AND we could take our beers in so it may just be the best thing ever. Up yours Onsen!Read more
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New Zealand Joanna Turner
Last day with Laurence
November 29, 2018 in New Zealand ⋅ ⛅ 16 °C
We got up and attempted to pack all our stuff into the rucksacks which proved to be much harder than either of us feared. Then it was a casual 4 hour drive to Christchurch where we emotionally waved goodbye to Laurence. We decided to drown our sorrows with a conveniently timed happy hour which turned into quite a session in a cool little food hall type effort near our air bnb. I’m fairly certain I was shitfacedRead more
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Trip end
November 30, 2018